MAG1 Posted March 30, 2007 Report Share Posted March 30, 2007 Been there fella.follow your head not your heart.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the last engineer Posted March 30, 2007 Report Share Posted March 30, 2007 LG, we are not married, and we do not have any kids together. I am divorced have two kids with my ex (20 & 17) who live in wales with their mum. We decided when we got together to move to scotland for a fresh start in life, and i have made some friends, got some good ground for shooting, life seemed to be getting on track, then this. I am hurting, just because she has made a mug of me, and what did i do to derserve this??? If i fell out of love with her and then someone else, i would of left, no if's or but's.. I am currently on a managment programme in work, but due to finances i can't afford to get a place on my own, the only option is to go back to wales. The trust has gone, and that is something that can consume you and then things go wrong. If it wasn't for my shooting i would of done something stupid, but i have too much to lose over some bloke and her. Thanks for the wise words from so many FRIENDS having read your plight my heart felt sympathy mate, gone the same road myself, take a read of Axes post again and act on it, in my opinion its the one that hits the nail on the head. good luck in the near future, start thinking of yourself for a change, do whats good for you not her. Martin " I have been in a similar situation in the past, though it did not last that long. One thing I found was that after having tried to sort the problems and succesfully managing to get the relationship back on track, I just didnt have the trust in my partner after that. Relationships arent just based on trust but without it, well you know what I mean. For me that spelt the end, even though I didnt want it to. So I said my goodbyes and never looked back. And you know, I have never wanted to look back ever since and now have a wonderful family. Guess I was lucky. But at the end of the day, you must follow what is right for you. Be strong, keep ya head up and dont do anything silly. -------------------- Regards, Axe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
08shooter Posted March 30, 2007 Report Share Posted March 30, 2007 best wishes kip you will have to do what feels right.on a lighter note there are lots of avon books kickin around here and lots of numbers on her phone mmmmmm . love of my life i know i can trust her. good luck anyhow Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonno 357 Posted March 30, 2007 Report Share Posted March 30, 2007 I have my faults (who doesn't??) but i was committed to this relationship 100%. I am BORING as i don't drink, smoke, like TV sports,Porn etc, i dress in GREEN and there are books with guns on them everywhere, when a passenger or driving for that matter i am always looking out in the fields, her words "God your SAD" Bl**dy ell mate you are SAD. She is right Get a few of bottles of Chablis nicely chilling, must be a nice vino not that cheap junk from tesco . Get the Akon "Don't Matter" CD in the back ground. Bob's yer uncle Jonno Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yorkshire Pudding Posted March 30, 2007 Report Share Posted March 30, 2007 Kip Life is for LIVING , no second goes at it , as your a long time dead . An we only get a few years to grab the bull by the horns mate ! all the best yis yp Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
muckybear Posted March 30, 2007 Report Share Posted March 30, 2007 I have my faults (who doesn't??) but i was committed to this relationship 100%.I am BORING as i don't drink, smoke, like TV sports,Porn etc, i dress in GREEN and there are books with guns on them everywhere, when a passenger or driving for that matter i am always looking out in the fields, her words "God your SAD" Bl**dy ell mate you are SAD. She is right Get a few of bottles of Chablis nicely chilling, must be a nice vino not that cheap junk from tesco . Get the Akon "Don't Matter" CD in the back ground. Bob's yer uncle Jonno ***** Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darebear Posted March 30, 2007 Report Share Posted March 30, 2007 a lot of sound advice and opinions here which echo my thoughts exactly. i hope it all works out well for you. and remember, life is for living Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
njc110381 Posted March 31, 2007 Report Share Posted March 31, 2007 If she was mine, she'd be going. There's no real proof that anything is going on, but to have a guy in her phone under a girls number is just daft, she's obviously got something to hide. You have no kids together so that's one good thing because you don't have to consider them. If there's no proof and she's not honest, you can talk all you like and may never know the truth. My ex did the same to me, and I text the guy as if I was her asking him if he wanted to do anything later as my bloke was going out, and what did he fancy doing! That sorted that, and she was going from the moment I got the reply as she had to admit it once she was found out. She stayed for some time after. She washed up and slaved for me with no thanks, until she was so messed up she packed her stuff and left. Am I guilty, NO. She had it coming from the day she cheated on me and I enjoyed every minute of it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mickymiroku Posted March 31, 2007 Report Share Posted March 31, 2007 Well this is something i would not normally do (washing my problems in public) but i feel that you are after all my friends Your partner is a friendly person, gets on well with fellow work colleagues etc, and you trust them. Then things start happening that seem wrong, so you start snooping and look at the Mobile phone and find a text from a bloke saying "Morning Sexy xxx" and your partner had been out the evening before while you have been to work!!!! Then you find out that they have purchased a Christmas present for this persons child but not your own with your ex-wife. So you have an argument and decide to try and get through this. I phoned the guy in question and asked what his game was, and told him to back off. Then i had to work with him for one shift, and he asked why was i on this shift my reply "To keep an eye on my girlfriend, and to make sure i know your face " Then over a year later your suspicion's are aroused again so you check the phone and there is a text message "Morning sexy, I'm knackered, c u later xxx" but this time it is on the phone under a girls name And the previous evening she said she was going to collect some Avon books from a friend, so when i came home there were no books in the house, so when she was up for work i mentioned the books "oh they are in my boot" and she heads off for the shower. So i get up go to the car and there are NO books in the car either, hence why i checked the phone. So for me it has all ended, i moved to Scotland to make a new life for the pair of us leaving my family in Wales, so no-one to talk to really hence this post to my Friends. If it were not for the fact i hold my FAC & SGC i would of asked for Steven Seagal to possess my body and let loose....... There is a line when you are in a relationship, and how far over the line would you let it go. Now i have never been one for exchanging my number with the opposite sex, some people do but they know how far they can take things. Since i have been here i have had offers, but have always declined because i know where the fine line is in a relationship. I have my faults (who doesn't??) but i was committed to this relationship 100%. I am BORING as i don't drink, smoke, like TV sports,Porn etc, i dress in GREEN and there are books with guns on them everywhere, when a passenger or driving for that matter i am always looking out in the fields, her words "God your SAD" I do not have any one's number i shouldn't and there are NO WOMENS NUMBER OR EMAIL ADDRESS. But she is trying to make out that i have been up to something. So i have to try and get a transfer with my job back to wales, as i cannot afford to stay in Scotland (CSA payments) and will have to move back with my parents(38 yrs old, this is not a good prospect). I would like to hear your thoughts, and i know there are two sides to every story Thank you for taking the time to read this Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mickymiroku Posted March 31, 2007 Report Share Posted March 31, 2007 sorry to hear of your problems, i,v been in a bad situation myself and i can tell you there is no easy way out. having said that, ther has been some great advice given to you on this site, your problem is sorting out which advice is right for you. for me , i just wish i had taken some good advice and acted on it many years ago.i think me and the kids would have had a better life if i had had the nerve to move on .ifyou could only stand back and look at your life from a distance you might be able to see where to go. funny thing , i have never put these words down in writing before ,i suppose i,v been a fool to myself not to take my own advice but it,s easy to go wrong, and very hard to do the right thing at times. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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