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My wife!


steve_b_wales
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Continuing with the 'wonderful' things she comes out with, we were taking about horse racing etc yesterday, and she commented, 'I'm always wanted to go to the dogs'. I couldn't help myself when I said, 'Love, you went there years ago'!

I'm currently writing this in the A&E department at my local hospital.:)

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you see chaps, the ladies are up in the middle of the night checking what you've been up to, while your fast asleep and vulnerable ?? 

5 minutes ago, loriusgarrulus said:

And the frying pans.

Plus you never know what could be put in your food.

 

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2 hours ago, Mice! said:

you see chaps, the ladies are up in the middle of the night checking what you've been up to, while your fast asleep and vulnerable ?? 

 

Checking my pigeon watch is what she's been doing...... 

If this forum was a woman we'd be having an affair according to her. 

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 4/1/2018 at 08:16, steve_b_wales said:

Continuing with the 'wonderful' things she comes out with, we were taking about horse racing etc yesterday, and she commented, 'I'm always wanted to go to the dogs'. I couldn't help myself when I said, 'Love, you went there years ago'!

I'm currently writing this in the A&E department at my local hospital.

LOL, Mine once said that she wished her boobs were bigger and i told her to wipe them every morning with toilet paper.

She said "will that make them bigger?"   I said it's worth a try coz it worked on your ****!!!!..bless her.

My bruises soon healed!

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On 4/3/2018 at 04:20, loriusgarrulus said:

And the frying pans.

Plus you never know what could be put in your food.

Some years ago the husband of one of my wife's friends did something that badly peed her off. Two days later he was stricken with a serious case of continuous runs resulting in the bathroom being occupied for long periods over the next two/three days. The husband lost three days work and wages and was not a happy bunny but put it down to a virus.

Around two months later she managed to let slip that his gippy tummy was down to the triple dose of laxatives she had put in his curry, he was an even unhappier bunny and plotted his revenge.

One night she was feeling frisky so they retired to the bedroom and spent a pleasant hour or so passing the time. Next day he asked if she would like to see a short video and then showed her the results of the previous nights friskiness. Told her if she ever pulled anything like the laxative stunt again he would put it on youtube with her email address and name.

The girl would not say what they had been up to (in detail), husband told the girl the video recording was on a disc and now in a secret place. She turned the house upside down but never found it and he never told her he had erased it afterwards.

EVERY WORD TRUE 

 

Edited by Sha Bu Le
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34 minutes ago, Sha Bu Le said:

Some years ago the husband of one of my wife's friends did something that badly peed her off. Two days later he was stricken with a serious case of continuous runs resulting in the bathroom being occupied for long periods over the next two/three days. The husband lost three days work and wages and was not a happy bunny but put it down to a virus.

Around two months later she managed to let slip that his gippy tummy was down to the triple dose of laxatives she had put in his curry, he was an even unhappier bunny and plotted his revenge.

One night she was feeling frisky so they retired to the bedroom and spent a pleasant hour or so passing the time. Next day he asked if she would like to see a short video and then showed her the results of the previous nights friskiness. Told her if she ever pulled anything like the laxative stunt again he would put it on youtube with her email address and name.

The girl would not say what they had been up to (in detail), husband told the girl the video recording was on a disc and now in a secret place. She turned the house upside down but never found it and he never told her he had erased it afterwards.

EVERY WORD TRUE 

 

Is this another someone else story or  is it nearer to home?

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  • 1 month later...

Another 'classic' from my wife:

She was helping me remove the old cement grouting from between the patio stones, using a hammer and chisel. I commented later, that I had a blister on the palm of my hand, and she replied, 'I've got a blister under my ring'. Later she commented, 'I've now got blisters on both sides of my ring'.

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