steve_b_wales Posted December 1, 2007 Report Share Posted December 1, 2007 Have you, or anyone you know, said something and then wished you hadn't. I'll start this off. Once, when on holidays in Bulgaria, I found a sock on my balcony, which had obviously fallen from one of the balcony's above. I took it down to reception and said to the receptionist, "I've found this sock on my balcony, it's no good to me, but would be suitable for someone with one leg!" A man standing nearby said, "Well I'll have that then" and proceeded to lift his trouser leg, showing off his false leg! I could have died!!! Luckily he saw the funny side of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidibear Posted December 1, 2007 Report Share Posted December 1, 2007 I had some guys on site at Tesco Stafford refurnishing some shelving, taking it down, taking it away to be recoated and then return to site to re install it. They phoned me and said one of the managers had stopped them working and said they couldn't start again for five hours. I drove up to stafford to sort it out. I was introduced to the guy who stopped them working and proceeded to inform him that the store are having an important meeting with some bloke from head office, I would still have to charge the store for the delay and if the works are not completed then it would be me who gets it in the neck. I was not going to be responsible for him causing me grief so I asked who he was and what right he had to step in and stop these works. "I am Terry Leahy" he replied, "Well actually, its Sir Terry Leahy, and I own Tesco's". He then went on to say that the noise was disturbing the meeting, he gave me his business card and said to send the extra costs direct to him. I sent him the bill, and yes, it was paid :blink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
benbaikal Posted December 1, 2007 Report Share Posted December 1, 2007 bumped into a old school mate in a pub had not seen him for years asked how is dad was said he died last month :blink: then asked him if he has seen anything of his best mate at school he said yes he ran off with my misses time to drink up i think Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vole Posted December 1, 2007 Report Share Posted December 1, 2007 Phoned my mate and his (ex) Wife,a bit of a battleaxe said hes down the garden and proceeded to walk to him with the cordless phone talking to me. She said he,s up a tree ( he was pruning it). I said "has he had enough and is stringing himself up?") THEN she went quiet and I remembered something about her past...HER ex had hung himself. ******! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poacher Posted December 1, 2007 Report Share Posted December 1, 2007 I had a driving lesson a few days ago, the instructor was waiting in the car park to meet me, i get the keys off him (he's in the passenger seat) and get in, but the chair was really close to the wheel, (now me being lanky 6ft something) said to him whilst adjusting the chair, jeese who was in here last they must have been a bit of a short ****. And he replied well it was me actually. Dohh Another one, whilst at work the other day i asked a young chap 18-20 odd if he was working tommorow (tommorow being sunday) he replied no i never work sundays. I then replied jokingly oh you lucky sod, what you going to do; go to church ? He replied well actually Yes. The rest of my shift with him was spent commending him on his stance and on how younger people should take more interest in religion. :blink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mungler Posted December 1, 2007 Report Share Posted December 1, 2007 Phoned my mate and his (ex) Wife,a bit of a battleaxe said hes down the garden and proceeded to walk to him with the cordless phone talking to me. She said he,s up a tree ( he was pruning it). I said "has he had enough and is stringing himself up?") THEN she went quiet and I remembered something about her past...HER ex had hung himself. ******! I choked and then coughed out what I was eating through my nose when I read this :blink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferret Master Posted December 1, 2007 Report Share Posted December 1, 2007 Phoned my mate and his (ex) Wife,a bit of a battleaxe said hes down the garden and proceeded to walk to him with the cordless phone talking to me. She said he,s up a tree ( he was pruning it). I said "has he had enough and is stringing himself up?") THEN she went quiet and I remembered something about her past...HER ex had hung himself. ******! I choked and then coughed out what I was eating through my nose when I read this :blink: Saw a boy do that with a strawberry flavoured gummy lace at school a couple of years ago! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vole Posted December 1, 2007 Report Share Posted December 1, 2007 I told him after they split,she never mentioned it to him so put it down to ignorance of her past.A real Get My Coat moment. :blink: I am usually the epitome of discretion as part of my job is dealing with death and bereavement,saying all the right things etc.Suppose one is permitted the odd lapse.Oops. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bagsy Posted December 1, 2007 Report Share Posted December 1, 2007 he said yes he ran off with my misses :blink: Did you not know he'd run off with your Mrs? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jerico Posted December 1, 2007 Report Share Posted December 1, 2007 Move in with me :blink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the last engineer Posted December 1, 2007 Report Share Posted December 1, 2007 Move in with me :blink: been there done..........said that :blink: what was i think...........drinking Martin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Griff36 Posted December 1, 2007 Report Share Posted December 1, 2007 He then went on to say that the noise was disturbing the meeting, he gave me his business card and said to send the extra costs direct to him. I sent him the bill, and yes, it was paid :blink: Sidibear, what do you do for a living? Shop fitting? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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