Zapp Posted May 1, 2008 Report Share Posted May 1, 2008 Ron has asked me to pass on his deepest condolences to MelB3 and his family/inlaws, Mel, Ron's thoughts are with you all. ZB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mel b3 Posted May 9, 2008 Report Share Posted May 9, 2008 thank you for the kind words guys , as you can imagine we are all devastated ( me , holly 14yrs old , matthew 12yrs old) but hopefully we will come to terms with a new normality. me and cheryl met when she was 15yrs old and i was 17 yrs old . we've seen a few highs and a few lows together and we always stood side by side. i can't begin to imagine what things will be like in the future as right now i'm feeling so lonely. cheryl had been fighting breast cancer for around 3 1/2 yrs and she fought like a lion to her last breath , she was so brave that it was heartbreaking to see this beautifull young woman go through this terrible ordeal. i'd like to thank the guys that helped me and chez in her last few weeks (paddy , rachel , tony ) because if it hadn't have been for the support of family and friends like these we would never have coped . many thanks , mel ps next time you see a tickled pink ribbon for sale , drop a quid in the box , it might just be the quid that saves another family from feeling how we're all feeling right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony9r Posted May 9, 2008 Report Share Posted May 9, 2008 Mel, my sincere condolences to you and your family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ice Posted May 9, 2008 Report Share Posted May 9, 2008 Im so sorry for your loss, i can only begin imagen what it must be like for you at this terrible time. Best wishes Ice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Floating Chamber Posted June 3, 2008 Report Share Posted June 3, 2008 Mel! Your mates say you ain't too good! I asked about you when the collection was made yesterday. Send me a pm; let's talk! FC Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mel b3 Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 Mel! Your mates say you ain't too good! I asked about you when the collection was made yesterday. Send me a pm; let's talk! FC i'm a mess , i thought i would be able to get on with things but i can't . i went back to work for a few days after the funeral but i cracked. each day i think that things can't possibly get any worse , then i get up the next day and they are. i can feel myself slipping into mental illness daily. nobody had seen me cry since i was 8yrs old , i can now quite happily sit in front of a stranger and cry until snot runs down my face. i'm smoking 60 fags each day and the thought of lung cancer cheers me up now. the final insult was when they paid our mortgage off and sent me enough money to feed the kids until they're 30yrs old , i'm now surplus to requirements. a few people have said i'm depressed and i should see the doctor , i'm not depressed , i'm just missing cheryl. i have never known such heartbreak , i never knew that emotional pain could be so much worse than physical pain. i keep telling myself that thousands of other people feel just like this , they get on with it so why can't i. i have always been a very together sort of person and nothing scared me , well , this has got me beat. the last few months of cheryls life consisted of 20hr days for me , i was fine with that , i would have done anything for her as she would have done for me , when she passed away my watch stopped(it really did) and time has stood still ever since. we always had plans for the future , i can no longer look forward , i can only see the past. please excuse me if this sounds like a suicide note , it's not , i couldn't do it to the kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr W Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 I really feel for you mate. I guess you just have to deal with each day at a time and help your kids as they must be feeling the same, hopefully together you can all be there for each other. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry d Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 Mel, you are far from surplus to requirements, you can use the strength of the love you shared with Cheryl to bring up Holly & Matthew, but you do need some help and you need to seek it as soon as possible. You`ve done well to get this far and I cannot even begin to know what you are going through, but as I`ve said there is help out there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
webber Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 My deepest sympathy to Mel and his family. webber Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ice Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 Like i said mate, i have no idea what these times must be like for you so i can only begin to imagen. Just try to look to the future, think of your kids, try to help them think positive and enjoy there youth, make plans for the future to get away with your kids, get away from it all. I know it must be terribly hard, but try to remember the good times you had togeather, when you laughed and had fun, this should bring a tear of happiness to your eye. Be strong! your family and closest friends is what you need at this time, they will be your backbone!!! Take good care Ice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mel b3 Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 Mel, you are far from surplus to requirements, you can use the strength of the love you shared with Cheryl to bring up Holly & Matthew, but you do need some help and you need to seek it as soon as possible. You`ve done well to get this far and I cannot even begin to know what you are going through, but as I`ve said there is help out there. i know h , i've been in touch with cruse , i'm on the waiting list so it should be any day now. i don't know what they can do though , only one thing will make me feel better and that can never happen. i've been talking about it as much as i can, in fact , i'll talk to just about anybody about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr W Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 Well we're all here if you want to talk/write about anything if it will help in any way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cranfield Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 Mel, don't forget your children need you to be strong for them, they will be suffering as badly as you are. I'm glad you are getting some help, Cruse were a great comfort to a friend of mine in similar circumstances about a year ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hawkeye Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 Mel i feel for you mate i went through this 5 years ago my wife fell ill and died a few hours later. I did have the thought that we had been together 31 years, i was the same as you talked about it all the time to friends and relatives. It does get easier as time passes but it is a slow healing process even now after 5 years i can shed a tear or two thinking about her. We have never met but if i can be of help in any way feel free to PM me... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mel b3 Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 Mel, don't forget your children need you to be strong for them, they will be suffering as badly as you are.I'm glad you are getting some help, Cruse were a great comfort to a friend of mine in similar circumstances about a year ago. it's the other way around , they're supporting me . we've always bought them up to be very indipendant , we always taught them to have a go at anything because "you never know when we won't be here to help you" , they can , cook , wash , iron , clean , handle finances ,handle firearms , my lad has even been able to drive a car for around 3yrs. my sister has moved in with us so i have no domestic problems(i could do it anyway) and i certainly have no financial or work worries. i think a lot of my problem is that i've never shown any negative emotion during her illness , i was only ever positive with cheryl and i never let my face crack. now that she's gone , 31/2 years of pain and anguish are flooding out. from the very beggining she said , "if the cancer becomes terminal , don't tell me " and " don't let me die in hospital " . i kept my promise on both counts , we saw it through to the bitter end without her knowing that she was going to die , i was never able to say goodbye to her or else she would have known. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peter-peter Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 deepest sympathy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ice Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 JESUS Christ mate!! your bringing a tear to my eye just reading you words........ I really feel for you, as im sure so many other are feeling right now...... take good care of yourself mate!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MM Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 just do your best Mel, let you kids be there for you and be there for them. best wishes mate Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackthorn Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 JESUS Christ mate!! your bringing a tear to my eye just reading you words........ I really feel for you, as im sure so many other are feeling right now...... take good care of yourself mate!! as ice said, look after your self Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mossy835 Posted June 4, 2008 Report Share Posted June 4, 2008 so sad two hear this,hope you do get over it and can carry on with life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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