Hot financial advice

[Supersonic]

If you had purchased £1000 of Northern Rock shares one year ago it would now be worth £4.95.

 

With HBOS, earlier this week your £1000 would have been worth £16.50.

 

£1000 invested in XL Leisure would now be worth less than £5.00.

 

But if you bought £1000 worth of Tennents Lager one year ago, drank it all, then took the empty cans to an aluminium re-cycling plant, you would get £214.

 

So based on the above statistics the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and re-cycle.

Edited October 1, 2008 by Supersonic

[rimfire4969]

and more and recycle, love it and my wife always tells me to recycle more now i know how to do it.

[Drive By]

Is that accurate?!? If so i might start doing the councils recycling job for them! Sure the guy next door puts out about a thousand empty stella cans every couple of weeks!

[Mungler]

Do you live next door to LV?

[malkiserow]

Do you live next door to LV?

[Drive By]

Its possible, not even sure what the guys name is, surely he wouldn't have time to shoot if he's working his way through that much stella! Unless he's like Bill Werbeniuk (the snooker player)...

[Piebob]

If you had purchased ?1000 of Northern Rock shares one year ago it would now be worth ?4.95.

 

With HBOS, earlier this week your ?1000 would have been worth ?16.50.

 

?1000 invested in XL Leisure would now be worth less than ?5.00.

 

But if you bought ?1000 worth of Tennents Lager one year ago, drank it all, then took the empty cans to an aluminium re-cycling plant, you would get ?214.

 

So based on the above statistics the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and re-cycle.

 

Supersonic, hud on. 1000 UKP would buy you 1863 cans of Tennents larger based on Tesco.com prices. There are 15 grams of aluminium in a 440ml can that means you’d have 28kgs of aluminium or .028 of a tonne (and that’s assuming no cans are lost to shooting incidents, pyrotechnic experiments or whatever).

 

The best 27 month seller rate for aluminium on the LME was $2,827 a tonne. So, in brief, you’d have $80 bucks tops, at the best 12 month exchange of $2 to 1UKP you’d have 40 quid max not 214.

 

However consuming 1863 cans of Tennents, you’d gain approximately 6kgs of body fat (assuming you’re going to have a few curries with said libation). Simple home lipo-suction can be achieved with a Halfords lilo pump on “sook†setting and a length of brake pipe. The acquired fat can be made into ‘very special organic soap’ which can be sold on ebay at £15.99 for a 25 gram bar, netting you £3,837 pure profit.  

 

Ching ching!!

[Supersonic]

If you had purchased ?1000 of Northern Rock shares one year ago it would now be worth ?4.95.

 

With HBOS, earlier this week your ?1000 would have been worth ?16.50.

 

?1000 invested in XL Leisure would now be worth less than ?5.00.

 

But if you bought ?1000 worth of Tennents Lager one year ago, drank it all, then took the empty cans to an aluminium re-cycling plant, you would get ?214.

 

So based on the above statistics the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and re-cycle.

 

Supersonic, hud on. 1000 UKP would buy you 1863 cans of Tennents larger based on Tesco.com prices. There are 15 grams of aluminium in a 440ml can that means you’d have 28kgs of aluminium or .028 of a tonne (and that’s assuming no cans are lost to shooting incidents, pyrotechnic experiments or whatever).

 

The best 27 month seller rate for aluminium on the LME was $2,827 a tonne. So, in brief, you’d have $80 bucks tops, at the best 12 month exchange of $2 to 1UKP you’d have 40 quid max not 214.

 

However consuming 1863 cans of Tennents, you’d gain approximately 6kgs of body fat (assuming you’re going to have a few curries with said libation). Simple home lipo-suction can be achieved with a Halfords lilo pump on “sook†setting and a length of brake pipe. The acquired fat can be made into ‘very special organic soap’ which can be sold on ebay at £15.99 for a 25 gram bar, netting you £3,837 pure profit.  

 

Ching ching!!

 

 

There's always one

 

Hadrian really didn't build that wall high enough!

 

 

[martin1]

:drinks: