proud to be scottish

[kirky640]

>>> Proud To Be Scottish

>>>

>>> Being Scottish is about driving in a German car to an Irish

>>>pub for a

>>> Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry

>>>or ,aTurkish

>>> kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch

>>>American shows on

>>> a Japanese TV.

>>>

>>> And the most Scottish thing of all? Suspicion of all

>>>things foreign!

>>> Only in Scotland can a pizza get to your house faster

>>>than an ambulance.

>>>

>>>

>>> Only in Scotland do supermarkets make sick people walk all

 

>>>the way to the

>>> back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy

 

>>>people can buy

>>> cigarettes at the front.

>>>

>>> Only in Scotland do banks leave both doors open and

>>>chain the pens to the

>>> counters.

>>>

>>> Only in Scotland do we leave cars worth thousands of

>>>pounds on the drive

>>> and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

>>>

>>> Only in Scotland do we use answering machines to screen

>>>calls and then

>>> have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we

 

>>>didn't want to

>>> talk to in the first place.

>>>

>>> Only in Scotland are there disabled parking places in

>>>front of a skating

>>> rink.

>>>

>>> NOT TO MENTION..

>>>

>>> 3 Scots die each year testing if a 9v battery works on

>>>their tongue.

>>>

>>> 142 Scots were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from

 

>>>new shirts.

>>>

>>> 58 Scots are injured each year by using sharp knives instead

>of

>>> screwdrivers.

>>>

>>> 31 Scots have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas

>>>tree while the

>>> fairy lights were plugged in.

>>>

>>> 19 Scots have died in the last 3 years believing that

>Christmas

>>> decorations were chocolate.

>>>

>>> Scottish Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after

>Xmas

>>> cracker-pulling accidents.

>>>

>>> 18 Scots had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper

>>>with a lit

>>> cigarette in their mouth.

>>>

>>> A massive 543 Scots were admitted to A&E in the last two

>>>years after

>>> trying to open bottles of beer with their teeth.

>>>

>>> 5 Scots were injured last year in accidents involving

>>>out-of-control

>>> Scalextric cars.

>>>

>>> and finally...

>>>

>>> In 2000 eight Scots were admitted to hospital with fractured

 

>>>skulls

>>> incurred whilst throwing up into the toilet.

>>>

>>>

>>>

>>> SCOTLAND - Love it

[PestController]

Aye, lived there for 3 years, memories, memories....the land of the deep fried Mars bar.

[hawkeye]

Aye, lived there for 3 years, memories, memories....the land of the deep fried Mars bar.