Why Santa Can't be a Man

[P03]

Apart from the obvious fact that all the reindeer would have been shot during the Buck/Stag season and Rudolphs head would be on it's way to the Taxidermists Santa can't be a man because:

 

1. Men can't pack a bag.

2. Men would rather be dead than caught wearing red velvet.

3. Men would feel their masculinity is threatened - having to be seen with all those elves.

4. Men don't answer their mail.

5. Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described, even in jest, as anything remotely resembling a "bowl full of jelly."

6. Men aren't interested in stockings unless somebody's wearing them.

7. Having to do the Ho Ho Ho thing would seriously inhibit their ability to pick up women.

8. Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a commitment.

 

 

PS. I nicked this from t'interweb