white fox Posted August 18, 2006 Report Share Posted August 18, 2006 TESTICULATING. Waving your arms around and talking ********. BLAMESTORMING. Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible. SEAGULL MANAGER. A manager, who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves. ASSMOSIS. The process by which people seem to absorb success and advancement by sucking up to the boss rather than working hard. SALMON DAY. The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die. CUBE FARM. An office filled with cubicles. PRAIRIE DOGGING. When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see that's going on. (This also applies to applause for a promotion because there may be cake.) SITCOMs. Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids or start a "home business". SINBAD. Single working girls. Single income, no boyfriend and desperate. STRESS PUPPY. A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny. PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE. The fine art of whacking the **** out of an electronic device to get it to work again. ADMINISPHERE. The rarefied organisational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the "adminisphere" are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve. This is often affiliated with the dreaded "administrivia" - needless paperwork and processes. 404. Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found," meaning that the requested document could not be located. OHNOSECOND. That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all') GOING FOR A McS**t. Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food, you're just going to the bog. If challenged by a pimply staff member, your declaration to them that you'll buy their food afterwards is known as a McS**t with Lies. BEER COAT. The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise at 3am. BEER COMPASS. The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after booze cruise, even though you're too drunk to remember where you live, how you got here, and where you've come from. GREYHOUND. A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare. MILLENNIUM DOMES. The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from the outside, but there's actually naught in there worth seeing. MONKEY BATH. A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go:"Oo!Oo!Oo! Aa!Aa!Aa!". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferret Master Posted August 18, 2006 Report Share Posted August 18, 2006 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pike Posted August 19, 2006 Report Share Posted August 19, 2006 Fantastic!!! - could have been written for Local Government! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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