Lord Geordie

[hawkeye]

Can you remember last year when LG ran over his Berretta after he had been clay shooting with some of the lads from here and hunter world.

 

we gave him some stick pizz taking and the like and i have just found this on my PC.

 

dont know if its been on here before he posted this on the other site at the time its takeing the pizz out of me but i dont mind.

 

Just say it to the tune of ERNIE AND THE FASTEST MILK CART IN THE WEST (ENJOY)

 

 

Here you go a bit of a re write just chant along to the tune to Ernie and his fastest milk cart in the west and you get the picture

 

 

 

You could hear his big feet pound

as he walked across the ground

and the creaking of his loading press

as he reloads another round

he rode right into Thimbleby

his gun across his chest

his name was Hawkeye.

And he owned the cheapest shell press in the west

 

Now Hawkeye loved a rifle

a Tikka 223

he set off to shoot 10 foxes

but he only managed 3

he's such a tight ***** ***

he reloads his own brass

one day he over loaded one

and it knocked him clean on his ***

They call him Hawkeye. HAWKEYE

and he owned the cheapest shell press in the west

 

The clays they started flying

and Mike took out his gun

it ****** off the guy who ran the place

we were there till half past one

he tried to shoot 100 straight

but no matter what he tried

he couldn't get past 60

and then Danger Mouse said "Step aside"

 

Now Mike he had a rival

a better shot they say

called Andy Alias Danger Mouse

who couldn't half smash them clays

he out shot Hawkeye on the stands

he never missed a one

he shot like a professional

and Mike threw down his gun

Hawkeye wanted a rematch

but Danger Mouse said no way

we made a bet for £20

I won so now you pay.

Mike he had to admit defeat

and handed him the cash

out of 100 clays only 60 of them were smashed

poor Hawkeye. Hawkeye

and he had the cheapest shell press in the west.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now Mike he stormed off in a huff

his tail between his legs

it ****** him off cause he was beat

he was really seeing red

see Mike he SOLD to Danger Mouse

the Gun that won the day

Hawkeye said I WANT IT BACK

but DM said NO WAY!

His name was Hawkeye. HAWKEYE

and he owned the cheapest shell press in the west

 

When the cards were handed in

the scores were tallied up

Andy grinned as the scores were read

and DM won the cup

why don't we have a shoot out

Mike sneeringly replied

and just to make it interesting

we'll have a days shooting on the side

Now Mike he dragged him from his seat

and beneath the blazing sun

the pair of them stood face to face

and each loaded up his gun.

But DM was to good for him

things didn't go the way Mike planned

when a 28g of 7.5s

turned the orange clays to sand

Now we all stepped between them

and tried to keep them apart

but Mike just pushed us all aside

and defeat sank into his heart,

and he looked up in pained surprise

at the lead shot in the dusk

then it hit and smashed DM's final clay

and Hawkeye bit the dust

 

poor Hawkeye HAWKEYE

and he owned the cheapest shell press in the west

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Now Hawkeye's only 60

he didn't want to concede

but Mike he comes from Hartlepool

where they found the Monkey deed

so rather than face a ribbing

he thought he'd go one better

and take the ****

out of me instead

and the story of my beretta

But a shooters needs are many fold

and Mike he'll try again

but there is no way he'll do 100

his shooting is so lame,

Is that the clays a trembling

at his shots getting better

or a pair of shots of 28g

fired from my ghostly beretta

 

It will NEVER forget old Hawkeye. HAWKEYE

and he owns the cheapest shell press in the west…….

[Tom Janaway]

:(