NorfolkBoy Posted August 14, 2006 Report Share Posted August 14, 2006 Just wondering...... A list of points to ponder… Should crematoriums give discounts to burns victims? How did a fool and his money get together in the first place? If a mute kid swears, should his mother wash his hands with soap? Who’s cruel idea was it to put an ‘s’ in the word lisp? If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer? Is it true that cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny? If Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers? Why isn’t the word ‘phonetically’ spelt with an ‘f’? If a clown dies, do all the mourners turn up in one car? Do radioactive cats have eighteen half-lives? If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his walkman? What’s another word for Thesaurus? Why do they use sterile needles for lethal injections? Who benefits from a sign that says ‘To the Braille School’? What happens if you put a slinky on an escalator? If a word were misspelled in the dictionary, how would we know? If blind people wear dark glasses, why don’t deaf people wear ear muffs? If you are sending someone Styrofoam, what do you pack it in? Why are there 5 syllables in the word monosyllabic? Why don’t they make mouse flavoured cat food? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trakker01 Posted August 14, 2006 Report Share Posted August 14, 2006 well i tell ya ....that made me smile....good on ya buddy.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the lizard Posted August 15, 2006 Report Share Posted August 15, 2006 Just wondering...... A list of points to ponder… Should crematoriums give discounts to burns victims? How did a fool and his money get together in the first place? If a mute kid swears, should his mother wash his hands with soap? Who’s cruel idea was it to put an ‘s’ in the word lisp? If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer? Is it true that cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny? If Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers? Why isn’t the word ‘phonetically’ spelt with an ‘f’? If a clown dies, do all the mourners turn up in one car? Do radioactive cats have eighteen half-lives? If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his walkman? What’s another word for Thesaurus? Why do they use sterile needles for lethal injections? Who benefits from a sign that says ‘To the Braille School’? What happens if you put a slinky on an escalator? If a word were misspelled in the dictionary, how would we know? If blind people wear dark glasses, why don’t deaf people wear ear muffs? If you are sending someone Styrofoam, what do you pack it in? Why are there 5 syllables in the word monosyllabic? Why don’t they make mouse flavoured cat food? And a list of answers to consider : Should crematoriums give discounts to burns victims? Abso-bloody-lutely. Or a free Large Fries and some Crackling. How did a fool and his money get together in the first place? by luck or inheritance, usually. If a mute kid swears, should his mother wash his hands with soap? No - toothpaste. Who’s cruel idea was it to put an ‘s’ in the word lisp? some blo..uh..uh..uh..dy lexico..co..co..cographer's. If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer? a quiet brick works fine. Is it true that cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny? No. All fat stupid westerners taste funny. If Americans throw rice at weddings, do Asians throw hamburgers? Noodles 2 U. Why isn’t the word ‘phonetically’ spelt with an ‘f’? Ahh - now this is a goodie.... Because the word "phonetic" is not actually phonetic itself. Derived from the Greek word "phonos" using the ancient Greek alphabet - i.e. different phonemes. ETYMOLOGY: 19c: from Greek phonetikos, from phoneein to speak. remember - the word "onomatopoeia" is not an onomatopoeia itself. If a clown dies, do all the mourners turn up in one car? Hopefully. It's called a hearse. Do radioactive cats have eighteen half-lives? Of course. But do double-check with Schroedinger's cat first. Or maybe after ? If a jogger runs at the speed of sound, can he still hear his walkman? Yes. The walkman's signals are transmitted electronically, through metal wires. Therefore they travel at the speed of light. What’s another word for Thesaurus? Dictionary-of-Synonyms. OK, that's 3 words. I cheated. Why do they use sterile needles for lethal injections? Interesting NON-ethical question this... 1) because it would be too difficult and impractical NOT to. 2) well, you wouldn't want to contaminate the corpse either, would you? Who benefits from a sign that says ‘To the Braille School’? depends what kind of sign it is, really. If it is a acoustic sign (repeated public-address announcement), then the blind will benefit. If it is a Braille sign within a building or corridor, etc. then again, the blind will benefit. If it is a written sign on the side of a road - then it's going to be a waste of time. What happens if you put a slinky on an escalator? you can have a lot of fun. Going up or down ? If a word were misspelled in the dictionary, how would we know? check against another dictionary. (Preferably more than one.) but never rely on a single source of information. If blind people wear dark glasses, why don’t deaf people wear ear muffs? because you don't normally look into people ears when you are talking to them - you look into their eyes. (unless you are whispering, of course.) If you are sending someone Styrofoam, what do you pack it in? Itself of course. And save money. Why are there 5 syllables in the word monosyllabic? Actually it’s 10 syllables - but there were counting in base-5 when they did it. Why don’t they make mouse flavoured cat food? Don't they ? Now there's a thought. Maybe we could make some money here..... the Lizard Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dazza Posted August 15, 2006 Report Share Posted August 15, 2006 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darebear Posted August 15, 2006 Report Share Posted August 15, 2006 however, i reckon the sterile needle for the lethal injection is all about human rights, in some kinda weird and twisted irony. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.