pavman Posted August 30, 2006 Report Share Posted August 30, 2006 Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry Chinese takeaway or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV. And the most British thing of all? Suspicion of anything foreign. Oh and...... Only in Britain ... can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance. Only in Britain ... do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. Only in Britain ... do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke. Only in Britain ... do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters. Only in Britain ... do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage. Only in Britain ... do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place. Only in Britain ... are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink. NOT TO MENTION... 3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue. 142 Brits were injured in 1999 by not removing all pins from new shirts. 58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers. 31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in. 101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet. 18 Brits had serious burns in 2005 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth. A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth. 5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of Control Scalextric cars. and finally......... In 2005 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet....BE WARNED....we've all been there at some time. Many a true word spoken in jest as the old saying goes. be lucky, pavman Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axe Posted August 30, 2006 Report Share Posted August 30, 2006 Out of control Scalectrix Cars. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferret Master Posted August 30, 2006 Report Share Posted August 30, 2006 and finally......... In 2005 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet....BE WARNED....we've all been there at some time. Many a true word spoken in jest as the old saying goes. be lucky, pavman :look: :look: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darebear Posted August 30, 2006 Report Share Posted August 30, 2006 :o :o Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.