dead-eye-dick Posted August 3, 2002 Report Share Posted August 3, 2002 In true Dead-Eye style..... Anyone who knows me will know this is me all over...... Enjoy.......... :evil: :evil: 1. Every year, parks in London alone are doused in one million gallons of dog urine. 2. The germs present in human faeces can pass through up to ten layers of toilet paper. 3. The best recorded distance for projectile vomiting is 27 feet 4. Contrary to popular belief, if you swallow chewing gum it does not stay in the gut. Usually it will pass-through the system and is excreted without incident. However, several cases have been reported where the gum has stuck in the rectum, causing the unfortunate sufferer to excrete long sticky trails of gum, like a pink spider's web. 5. Several well-documented instances have been reported of extremely obese people flushing aircraft toilets whilst still sitting on them. The vacuum action of these toilets sucked the rectum inside out. 6. It is physically possible to cough your guts up. 7. If your body's natural defences failed, the bacteria in your gut would consume you within 48 hours, literally eating you from the inside out. 8. What is one of the most difficult items for sewage works to handle, as it is insoluble, yet fine enough to pass through most filtration systems? (Every month Thames Water removes over a ton of this substance from its water treatment plants, whereupon it is taken away to a landfill site and buried) You guessed it - pubic hair. 9. Parasites count for 0.01% of your body weight. 10. Henry II was murdered by his homosexual lover, who pushed a red-hot poker 0.5 metres up his rectum. 11. The longest recorded tapeworm found in the human body was 33 *metres* in length. 12. A woman who had recently visited South America, where she had safaried in local rainforest, began to experience severe pains in her left ear, accompanied by headaches, dizziness and constant rustling sounds, at first put down to tinnitus. It became so serious that exploratory surgery was required, which revealed that a spider which had become trapped in her ear. Eventually it had eaten through her eardrum and was living within the aural cavity. The rustling sounds were from the spider crawling around inside her skull. An egg sac was also removed. 13. A man in Australia was concerned about a growing lump on his nose, was examining it in the mirror and saw a red back spider crawl out. Doctors found an entire red back nest inside his nose. 14. An obese woman was admitted to a Queensland hospital with stomach pains, it turned out that her T.V. remote control was stuck in between rolls of fat and had become an abscess. 15. Another woman in Queensland who had lost a lot of weight went to the doctor with a big, hard, horn-like object protruding from her abdomen. Closer examination determined that it was years of compacted belly-button fluff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigDave15 Posted August 3, 2002 Report Share Posted August 3, 2002 K mum no tea for me tonight! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
everygoodnamewastaken Posted August 5, 2002 Report Share Posted August 5, 2002 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.