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Friday joke


henry d
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A guy walks into a pub with 3 ducks and places on the bar. He asks the barman to tend to them while he goes to the toilet. The barman agrees to which the man replies "you can have a chat with them as they actually talk".

 

The barman asks the first duck "Whats your name then" the duck replies "Mathew". "I see" says the barman, "what have you been doing today?". The duck replies "I have had a great day today, I have been in and out of puddles all day long, its been great!".

 

The barman asks the second duck "Whats your name then" the duck replies "Mark". "I see" says the barman, "and what have you been doing today?". The duck replies "Well like Mathew, i've been in and out of puddles all day long, its been great!".

 

So the barman says the the third duck "If he's Mathew and he's Mark, you must be Luke?" "No" the duck replies, "My name is Puddles"!

 

:good:

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man walks in to pub

 

the cigarette machine tells him to ****off

 

but the bowl of peanuts on the bar says how nice he looked

 

don't worry said the barman

 

the cigarette machine is out of order

 

but the peanuts are complimentary

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Whats the best thing about dating homeless girls?

 

 

 

 

You can drop them off anywhere. :good:

 

 

Please read all!

 

1.Start at LondonHeathrowAirport.

 

2.Catch flight from London Heathrow to DallasFort WorthAirport.

 

3.Hire car at DallasFort WorthAirport.

 

4.Start going toward the "Airport Exit" on "International Parkway South" follow for 0.2 miles.

 

5.Bear left onto the highway toward "Terminal East Parking" - follow for0.3miles

 

6.Bear left onto "International Parkway North" toward "North AirportExit" -follow for 2.9 miles

 

7.Take the "Highway 114 west" exit toward "Fort Worth" - follow for 29.2miles

 

8.Then continue on "US287 north" - follow for 91.1 miles

 

9."US287 north" becomes "Interstate-44 east" - follow for 0.7 miles

 

10.Take left fork onto "US-287 north" toward "Vernon" - follow for 104.0 miles

 

11."US 287 north" becomes "Avenue F (US-287)" - follow for 2.8 miles

 

12.Continue to follow "US287 north" - follow for 104.9 miles

 

13.Take left ramp onto "Interstate 40 west" toward "Dumas" - follow for 7.8 miles

 

14.Take "Exit 70" onto "US 60 east" toward "Dumas" - follow for 0.5 miles

 

15.Take the "Buchanan Street" exit toward "Dumas/Pampa" - follow for 1.7 miles

 

16.Turn right onto "Old Route 66 (Interstate 40)" - follow for 0.1 miles

 

17.Arrive at the centre of town.

 

please scroll down

 

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Now that's the fu#&ing way to Amarillo!

 

SO CAN EVERYONE STOP SINGING IT NOW . . . . .

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