Topgunners Posted May 31, 2007 Report Share Posted May 31, 2007 A lady walks into a high class jewellery shop. She browses around and spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to look more closely she inadvertently breaks wind. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that a sales person doesn't pop up right now. As she turns around, her worst nightmare materialises in the form of a salesman standing right behind her. Cool as a cucumber and displaying complete professionalism, the salesman greets the lady with: "Good day, Madam. How may we help you today?" Very uncomfortably, but hoping that the salesman may just not have been there at the time of her little 'accident', she asks: "Err, what is the price of this lovely bracelet?" He answers: "Madam, if you ****** just looking at it, you're going to **** yourself when I tell you the price." And one for all you "Paddywacks" Irish Buses Paddy and Mick are walking home after a night on the ****. They've got no money to get a taxi and are staggering all over the place when they find themselves outside a bus depot. Paddy has a brainwave and says to Mick "get in there and steal a bus so we can drive home and I'll stay out here and look out for the police" Mick duly breaks into the depot and is gone for twenty minutes while Paddy is wondering what the hell he is doing. Eventually Paddy sticks his head around the door and sees Mick running from bus to bus looking very worried. "What in all hell are you doing Mick, get a move on!" to which Mick replies" I can't find a number 7 anywhere Paddy", where upon Paddy,holding his hands to his head in disbelief, shouts" You ******* idiot Mick, steal a number 9 and we'll get off at the roundabout and walk the rest of the way!" Dave K Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lurcherboy Posted May 31, 2007 Report Share Posted May 31, 2007 ***** LB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Highlander Posted May 31, 2007 Report Share Posted May 31, 2007 Brilliant lovely way to start the day LMFO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darebear Posted May 31, 2007 Report Share Posted May 31, 2007 :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
codling99 Posted May 31, 2007 Report Share Posted May 31, 2007 :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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