lurcherboy Posted July 17, 2007 Report Share Posted July 17, 2007 2 Texas farmers. Two South Texas farmers, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer. Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the community college and sign up for some classes." Bob thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave. The next day, Jim goes down to the college and meets the Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: Math, English, history, and Logic. "Logic?" Jim says. "What's that?" The dean says, "I'll show you. Do you own a weedeater?" "Yeah." "Then logically speaking, because you own a weedeater, I think that you would have a yard." "That's true, I do have a yard." "I'm not done," the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house." "Yes, I do have a house" "And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family." "I have a family." "I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife." "Yes, I do have a wife." "And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be a heterosexual." "I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of that because I have a weedeater." Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the Dean's hand and leaves to go meet Bob at the bar. He tells Bob about his classes, how he is signed up for Math, English, History, and Logic. "Logic?" Bob says, "What's that?" Jim says, "I'll show you. Do you have a weedeater?" "No." "Then you're a queer" LB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tosspot Posted July 17, 2007 Report Share Posted July 17, 2007 **** i don't own a weedeater :good: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnGalway Posted July 17, 2007 Report Share Posted July 17, 2007 I'm off to buy one as I type Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lurcherboy Posted July 17, 2007 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2007 **** i don't own a weedeater :good: I'm off to buy one as I type Gaylords :look: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tosspot Posted July 17, 2007 Report Share Posted July 17, 2007 I'm off to buy one as I type do you think you can get them in a nice pastel colour? or should that be color? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnGalway Posted July 17, 2007 Report Share Posted July 17, 2007 **** i don't own a weedeater :good: I'm off to buy one as I type Gaylords :look: Just for that, I'm going to make sure it's bigger than yours Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lurcherboy Posted July 17, 2007 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2007 I ain't got one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest rabgoat Posted July 17, 2007 Report Share Posted July 17, 2007 :look: good one LB enjoyed that bit of banter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnGalway Posted July 17, 2007 Report Share Posted July 17, 2007 I ain't got one Handy, I won't have to spend so much now Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
decroyffe Posted July 17, 2007 Report Share Posted July 17, 2007 thats a funny joke Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thornton Posted July 18, 2007 Report Share Posted July 18, 2007 Many Texicans would prefer to be thought of as ranchers tho. What is the difference between a New York zoo and a Texas zoo? The New York zoo will have the common name of the animal and the Latin name of the animal. The Texas zoo will have the common name of the animal and....a recipe! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Briarscratch Posted July 18, 2007 Report Share Posted July 18, 2007 Here's one for ya'll. ( actually, where I'm from it's more like "here's one for youse guys") Tom and Fred were coming out of a corn field on the opening day of Minnesota's pheasant season. Passing in front of them on the road was a hearse and long procession of cars, escorted by a police car. Tom stopped, called his dog, took his cap off, and stood quietly at the side of the road with his dog while the funeral procession passed by. Once it had passed, Tom and his dog rejoined Fred. "Wow" Fred exclaimed, "You sure do show alot of respect for the dead!" "Jane was a hell of a wife." Tom replied, "I'm going to miss her." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lurcherboy Posted July 18, 2007 Author Report Share Posted July 18, 2007 :look: Cheers chaps Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axe Posted July 18, 2007 Report Share Posted July 18, 2007 Pure class :look: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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