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My anniversary


jimdfish
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As a year has passed since may accident I feel I can now talk about it without experiencing any of the jokes which i have had to endure over the past year. Once you have read this, although it is quite funny,it is a precautionary tale to not repeat what you see on TV. It had not rained for several weeks and the ground had baked hard as concrete. I decided to go and do a bit of stalking on my local pond and see if I could pick up some of the elusive carp that haunt the margins in high summer. As I had just watched Chris and Bob in their passion for angling for the umpteenth time, I decided to follow their lead and scale the tree nearest the water to await the emergence of the mystial leviathans. Before I had chance to see any of these creatures I awoke to find myself hooked up to several life support systems and a week older. I fractured my skull, punctured both of my lungs, broke all of my ribs on one side, broke most of the bones in my right hand, broke a hip, shoulder, collar bone and snapped the knuckle clean off the tibia in my left leg. I now have a doctors note so that I can get through customs without being stripsearched due to the massive amounts of metal in my body. If you do decide to scale a tree or do something which could endangr you while out alone.DONT

jimDfish

P.S any original jokes will have been heard before but please do not let this stop you trying

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Glad your better, I'll try and cut back on my tree climbing in future.

 

Reminds me of a work mate who did something similar and ended up with load of stainless steel in his legs. When in California he made a wrong turning and got stopped by the guys in a black-n-white, they thought he had been drinking or drugs and asked him to walk the line. With all the steel he was unable to, he spent the night banged up with nice local drug dealers and muggers. After many phone calls back to UK they believed him and let him go.

 

Gentle advice ... don't take a wrong turn in the USA near a black-n-white ;)

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Seems like your a lucky man to survive all of those injuries, and I do hope your right hand has healed and you can get a proper grip with it ;)

 

When I was a school I had a friend that decided to slide down a goalpost one bonfire night.

 

The nets had been removed off of the poles, but the hooks that held the nets on hadn't.

 

The night ended up with my mate in an ambulance, and one of his gonads outside in the cold.

 

Put me off of climbing for a long time!

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that was the only bit of me that I did not breal. My family all stll laugh about the time I was there and I had to have a catheter fixed. After a few weeks I had had enough with my old fella being pulled out of the door i my jimjams and thought this is coming out. I braced mysely and gave the tube a good old tug. It never moved On closer inspection there was a black thread holding the tube into my nudge. "B#stards" I thought, they have sown it in. It was only when my missus came up later and I complained about this that she had a look. Much laughing by her later she composed herself and told me it was a pube., Very red face. Probably way too much detail but I am having a wee nip tonight

jimDfish

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ooh that doesnt sound to good. sorry to hear about the incident, good to hear you have recovered from it. a pube, thats quite funny, dont want to think which 1 of you's it was.;)

 

when my dad was young he got ran over by a car, he was in hospital for over a year, he's still got metal in his legs and that was 33years ago, he is ok now and swims, drives, runs and even plays rugby and football from time to time. :blink:

Aled

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