Toddles Posted November 20, 2007 Report Share Posted November 20, 2007 Call me old fashioned if you like, but I alway's treat girls well. Turn up early before she's ready, then pace up and down tutting, she feels guilty for making you wait, and will try harder to be nice. Don't skimp on the dinner out, order the best. Prawn cocktail, Steak with peas & onion rings , and a cake for afters. Because after complaining about the food, then falling off your chair gripping your stomach, they won't expect you to pay the bill. You may need to argue a little, but she will respect your authority. By now, she is feeling a little sorry for you, so strike again. When you get to her house, double up with pain and ask her to call an Ambulance. Don't let her of course, so she will ask you to come in. Right, While she prepares the hot milk, you pretend to doze off. When she tries to arouse you, spit some phlegm on her blouse whilst innocently coughing. Got to take her top off now eh! The opportune moment has arrived, give her the After Eights just as she is 1/2 way through taking her top off. This rouse gives ample opportunity to fondle her whilst her hands are occupied. Once I fondle a girl, she stays fondled. Be a bit frosty in the morning, that will make her feel a little inadequate, and will try and regain favour with you by doing a big fry-up. Last but not least: Just before she dishes the breakfast up, casually mention that you like her a little plump, and you will at the very least, get one of her sausages and maybe some fried bread. Sorted! She had a good time as well, she should be well happy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Outlaw Posted November 20, 2007 Report Share Posted November 20, 2007 Love it Pie and mash with liquor and eels, cup of tea and a game of footy. An hour and a half screaming your head off in the North bank as it used to be called at The Boleyn Ground Upton Park, then a mad drive back across London to sane Buckinghamshire. One of our best dates, it worked because we have been together since 1989 and married since 1993. Many happy memories of different dates left to come. Tony Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jerico Posted November 20, 2007 Report Share Posted November 20, 2007 Love it Pie and mash with liquor and eels, cup of tea and a game of footy. An hour and a half screaming your head off in the North bank as it used to be called at The Boleyn Ground Upton Park, then a mad drive back across London to sane Buckinghamshire. One of our best dates, it worked because we have been together since 1989 and married since 1993. Many happy memories of different dates left to come. Tony Make it a dandylion and burdok with meypie and mash and a decent seat in the chicken run and I'll bloody marry ya! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Outlaw Posted November 20, 2007 Report Share Posted November 20, 2007 Love it Pie and mash with liquor and eels, cup of tea and a game of footy. An hour and a half screaming your head off in the North bank as it used to be called at The Boleyn Ground Upton Park, then a mad drive back across London to sane Buckinghamshire. One of our best dates, it worked because we have been together since 1989 and married since 1993. Many happy memories of different dates left to come. Tony Make it a dandylion and burdok with meypie and mash and a decent seat in the chicken run and I'll bloody marry ya! Tony Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Great Cornholio Posted November 20, 2007 Report Share Posted November 20, 2007 I always treat my girl with love and the utmost respect after a night of passion! After a wipe over, I fully deflate her and then, after putting her back in the box, I store her somewhere cool and dry! Seriously though. Toddles seems to have a good approach. However, I must say that I have tried a similar technique about 25 times with as many women, but have only managed success a couple of dozen times Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Great Cornholio Posted November 20, 2007 Report Share Posted November 20, 2007 Make it a dandylion and burdok with meypie and mash and a decent seat in the chicken run and I'll bloody marry ya! Should that read "my pie and mash" or "magpie and mash" ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trakker01 Posted November 20, 2007 Report Share Posted November 20, 2007 gentle & pampered ,like a princess, open all doors & flowers regular...... but dutch 50/50 when out!! always works , with a smart suit & tie........the names .......Mond raymond.. weekend s away do work well toooooooo!! :blink: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
markbivvy Posted November 20, 2007 Report Share Posted November 20, 2007 gentle & pimped ,like a porn queen, open all legs &de flowered regular...... but dutch 50/50 when out!! with the lads always works , with a smart suit & tie........the names .......Mond raymond.. end s away do work well toooooooo!! :blink: good man Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trakker01 Posted November 20, 2007 Report Share Posted November 20, 2007 gentle & pimped ,like a porn queen, open all legs &de flowered regular...... but dutch 50/50 when out!! with the lads always works , with a smart suit & tie........the names .......Mond raymond.. end s away do work well toooooooo!! :blink: good man you'r gettin' to know me tooooooo well!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Calamity Jane Posted November 20, 2007 Report Share Posted November 20, 2007 Wow you lot certainly know how to treat a girl! Toddles - love your style - you must have girls lining up! Jeff - I did wonder what that rubbery smell was around you on Sunday's - now we all know why!! :blink: I would say as long as you have lots of spare money, work long hours or away regularly - ideal, can cook, clean, babysit when necessary for girls night out, have nice looking friends who regularly pop round, is up for plastic surgery when gets too wrinkley, good at running baths and makes a good brew - you would have no problems at keeping a girl..... CJ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Outlaw Posted November 22, 2007 Report Share Posted November 22, 2007 Wow you lot certainly know how to treat a girl! Toddles - love your style - you must have girls lining up! Jeff - I did wonder what that rubbery smell was around you on Sunday's - now we all know why!! I would say as long as you have lots of spare money, work long hours or away regularly - ideal, can cook, clean, babysit when necessary for girls night out, have nice looking friends who regularly pop round, is up for plastic surgery when gets too wrinkley, good at running baths and makes a good brew - you would have no problems at keeping a girl..... CJ How is it you are still with me then because the only one I can say I am good at is the cook bit and thats once in a blue moon. Have you missed something off your list Jane Tony Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
berettaman1 Posted November 22, 2007 Report Share Posted November 22, 2007 I always treat my girl with love and the utmost respect after a night of passion!After a wipe over, I fully deflate her and then, after putting her back in the box, I store her somewhere cool and dry! Seriously though. Toddles seems to have a good approach. However, I must say that I have tried a similar technique about 25 times with as many women, but have only managed success a couple of dozen times Ha Ha Ha, only worked 24 times out of 25? CLASS, UTTER CLASS. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Great Cornholio Posted November 23, 2007 Report Share Posted November 23, 2007 Jeff - I did wonder what that rubbery smell was around you on Sunday's - now we all know why!! That would be my incontinence pants Jane Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lurcherboy Posted November 23, 2007 Report Share Posted November 23, 2007 I always try to treat the rottie as well as I treat my pack but I fear she will never realise her true potential I never let her know of my displeasure at her actions as I feel that will just reinforce her previous owners (liberal parents) mistakes but she gets lots of praise when she does something right When she is really good I will let her have chocalate. Yes I know I spoil her but please remember that these creatures are easilly trained to a very high degree if the fancy takes you. Chocalate is the ultimate fix with daytime TV time coming a close second LB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Outlaw Posted November 23, 2007 Report Share Posted November 23, 2007 Over the last 28 years I have had an interest in ladies rather than cars, motor bikes and fishing. And in this time I been nothing but a Gentleman, Cheeky some have said Funny. But above all true. If you get caught dipping your wick elsewhere, telling porkie pies or doing something wrong by the other half you expect to be dumped. Best advise is to be true to yourself and your partner. Then hopefully your devotion will be reciprocated. Having problems talk about it. The best way to be is honest. The other ways are being romantic and caring but these are useless if you are a cheating lieing ***. Tony Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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