Yorkshire Pudding Posted March 25, 2003 Report Share Posted March 25, 2003 (edited) A Cockney, Geordie and a Scouser were in the pub one Sunday lunchtime discussing football and generally putting the World to rights. "That fella on his own at the bar looks familiar" said the Geordie, "I've seen his picture around somewhere." Looks like Jesus to me says the Cockney with that long hair and beard - "Oy Jesus, fancy a pint?" he laughs. "How did you recognise me?" replied the stranger. "I will have a drink with you, and in return I will offer you each a healing in gratitude." Well, as you can imagine the 3 of them start laughing and order up the drinks. "Come on then JC - do your stuff", says the Cockney. "I've had these arthritic knees for years now and the Doctors can't give me anything." The stranger knelt down and touched his knees, muttered a few words and the pain and stifness disappeared immediately! They were all dumbstruck, "Me next," shouted the Geordie excitedly - "can you do anything about my exzema?" Jesus laid his hand upon the fella's head, whispered a short prayer and pronounced that he was healed of the skin condition. It was true and again they were all amazed. "Now it's your turn" said Jesus turning to the Scouser, who flew vertically off his barstool and jumped back. "You're not touching me you ****, I'm on Disability Benefit!" :unsure: all the best yis yp :ph34r: Edited March 27, 2003 by William Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neil Posted March 25, 2003 Report Share Posted March 25, 2003 :unsure: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dead-eye-dick Posted March 26, 2003 Report Share Posted March 26, 2003 I'll bet the scouser didn't put his hand in his pocket for the beers...... :unsure: :( Sorry boyz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skuta Posted March 27, 2003 Report Share Posted March 27, 2003 How do you manage it YP up 2 days and not Edited (Blue Eyes or Brown Arm) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teal Posted March 27, 2003 Report Share Posted March 27, 2003 YP, after skutas suggestion I reread your post. You specifically tried to get around the swear filter, its there for a reason. If you wish to continue to break the rules you're going to have to find somewhere else to post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yorkshire Pudding Posted March 27, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 27, 2003 Eh ? all the best yis yp :ph34r: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teal Posted March 27, 2003 Report Share Posted March 27, 2003 A little harsh perhaps but rules are rules :unsure: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yorkshire Pudding Posted March 27, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 27, 2003 " You specifically tried to get around the swear filter, its there for a reason. " Maybe will you could enlighten me to how i managed this ? all i did was cut and paste that joke. all the best yis yp :ph34r: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deako Posted March 27, 2003 Report Share Posted March 27, 2003 What do you call a Scouse bird in a white shell suit?....The bride! :unsure: ...lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teal Posted March 27, 2003 Report Share Posted March 27, 2003 No. The word ******* would have been blanked out, but you changed the letter a so it was á. If you did not change it and it was already like that (very much doubt) then you should be more careful what you post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yorkshire Pudding Posted March 27, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 27, 2003 Will Yup your right. i have been back to the site where i cut and pasted the joke from and yes it did have 1 of them slanty things over the a.If you would like me to paste the link i would be more than happy too. all the best yis yp :ph34r: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teal Posted March 27, 2003 Report Share Posted March 27, 2003 No its okay YP I believe you Its just a sneaky trick to avoid the filter and I accept it was genuinely an accident, its only if it happens repeatedly :unsure: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ernyha Posted March 27, 2003 Report Share Posted March 27, 2003 :unsure: Interesting point,what constitutes an illegal word in the forum. I would have thought that words that are listed in the Oxford English dictionary could hardly be considered obscene. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
columbus Posted March 28, 2003 Report Share Posted March 28, 2003 Little girl is cying in tescos, security guard ask her whats the matter, cant find my mother she replyed, whats she like the gaurd asked her. Big c**** and vodka the little girl said. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brain dead Posted March 28, 2003 Report Share Posted March 28, 2003 i've got a new car radio. shout pop music, it plays pop music. shout rock, it plays rock. some kids ran infront of my car and i shouted " f%*$ing kids " ............it played Michael Jackson. i'm helpin the boy scouts in making the worlds largest pancake on Saturday but we need more help so i thought of you. we are ok for cooks but we need a t***er. i woke early 1 morning the earth lay cool and still when suddenly a tiny bird perched on my window sill he sang a song so lovely so carefree and so gay that slowly all my troubles began to slip away he sang of far off places of laughter and of fun. i stirred beneath the covers crept slowly out of bed then gently shut the window and crushed his f%ing head i'm not a morning person! p.s. tried not to swear to badly in it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.