bobt Posted August 19, 2005 Report Share Posted August 19, 2005 1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is? 2. People who are willing to get off their *** to search the entire room for the tv remote because they refuse to walk to the tv and change the channel manually. 3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it? 4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their *****! 5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid £12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor. 6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine? 7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new. 8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer? 9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumb***? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
old rooster Posted August 19, 2005 Report Share Posted August 19, 2005 Think you missed out Tony Blair mate ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackthorn Posted August 19, 2005 Report Share Posted August 19, 2005 1.2.4.6.9.think i do all of these Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the last engineer Posted August 19, 2005 Report Share Posted August 19, 2005 bobt , Jesus man ......relax a little ,tis nearly the weekend go out and blast something ,i can just picture you fuming at the keyboard whilst typing :< so if ive told you once, ive told you a million times relax have a good weekend boys and girls ,going golfing saturday ,more of the drinking whilst in charge of a cart , but whatever rolls your cart Martin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ernyha Posted August 19, 2005 Report Share Posted August 19, 2005 My pet hate saying is when people say "It's cheap at half the price" Bloody well should be shouldn't it? :< Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the last engineer Posted August 19, 2005 Report Share Posted August 19, 2005 how about the guy, who looks at your arm in a cast ,and says "DID YOU BREAK IT " OR " DID THAT HURT " Martin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paulos Posted August 19, 2005 Report Share Posted August 19, 2005 and i ****in' hate the ******** who've just taken it upon themselves to jump on my car and run over the roof!!!!!!! :< :< :< :< i swear if i see the c**ts again im gonna tear em apart!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonno 357 Posted August 20, 2005 Report Share Posted August 20, 2005 I think Peter kay has covered must of them before Jonno Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teal Posted August 20, 2005 Report Share Posted August 20, 2005 Agree with you 100% mate!! I found this the other day, it's a copy of Osama's pet hates!! ---------- FROM: Bin Laden, Osama. TO: All Al Qaeda Fighters. SUBJECT: The Cave Hi guys. We've all been putting in long hours recently but we've really come together as a group and I love that! However, while we are fighting a jihad, we can't forget to take care of the cave, and frankly I have a few concerns: First of all: While it's good to be concerned about cruise missiles, we should be even more concerned about the dust in our cave. We want to avoid excessive dust inhalation, (a health and safety issue) - so we need to sweep the cave daily. I've done my bit on the cleaning roster - have you? I've posted a sign-up sheet near the cave reception area (next to the Halal toaster/griller). Second: It's not often I make a video address but when I do, I'm tryin to scare the hell out of most of the world's population, okay? That means that while we're taping, please do not ride your scooter in the background or keep doing the 'Wasssuuup' thing. Thanks. Third: Food. I bought a box of Bega cheese recently, clearly wrote "Ossy" on the front, and put it on the top shelf of the fridge. Today, two of my Bega slices were gone. Consideration. That's all I'm saying. Fourth: I'm not against team spirit and all that, but we must distance ourselves from the Infidel's bat and ball games. And Please - do not chant "Ossy, Ossy, Ossy. Oii Oii Oii" when I ride past on the donkey. Thanks. Fifth: Graffiti. Whoever wrote "OSAMA ***** DONKEYS" on the group toilet wall, it's a lie. The donkey backed into me, whilst I was relieving myself at the edge of the mountain. Sixth: The use of chickens is strictly for food. Assam, the old excuse that the 'chicken backed into me, whilst I was relieving myself at the edge of the mountain' will not be accepted in future. (With donkeys there is a grey area). Finally, we've heard that there may be Western soldiers in disguise trying to infiltrate our ranks. I want to set up patrols to look for them. First patrol will be Omar, Muhammad, Abdul, Akbar and Dave. Love you lots, Group Hug. Os. PS - I'm sick of having "Osama's Bed Linen" scribbled on my laundry bag. Cut it out, it's not funny anymore. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enniskillen Posted August 20, 2005 Report Share Posted August 20, 2005 very good Teal,made me laugh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devilishdave Posted August 20, 2005 Report Share Posted August 20, 2005 dave Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackthorn Posted August 20, 2005 Report Share Posted August 20, 2005 nice one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
digga Posted August 20, 2005 Report Share Posted August 20, 2005 baseball capped youths strolling along spitting!! do i look "dead hard" or what!!? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChrisNicholls Posted August 20, 2005 Report Share Posted August 20, 2005 My pet hate is a lot simpler than some of the above. My all time, super duper pet hate is........ Hair on the soap :< Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Browning GTS Posted August 21, 2005 Report Share Posted August 21, 2005 The *** who says long time no see :< :< :< if you just realised how much i hate the person who uses this bye bye Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
enniskillen Posted August 21, 2005 Report Share Posted August 21, 2005 When ur talking to someone and some other tw*t butts in. :< :< Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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