wabbitbosher Posted January 24, 2004 Report Share Posted January 24, 2004 How to shower like a woman Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry basket according to whites and coloureds. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups. Get in shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumicestone. Wash hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash hair again to make sure it is clean. Condition hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural avocado oil, leave on hair for 15 minutes. Wash face with crushed apricot ! facial, s crub for 10 minutes until red. Wash entire rest of body with ginger-nut and jaffa cake body wash. Shave armpits and legs Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower, spray mould spots with Tilex Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover any exposed areas. How to shower like a man Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed leave in a pile. Walk naked to the bathroom if you see wife along the way - shake **** at her making woo-hoo sound. Look at manly physique in the mirror, admire size of **** and scratch your ***. Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse it off. Make **** noises (real or artifical) and laugh at how loud they sound in the shower. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Wash your butt leaving those coarse hairs stuck on the soap. Shampoo hair. Make shampoo mohawk. Pee. Rinse off and get out of the shower. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on the floor. Admire **** size in mirror again. Leave shower door open, leave wet mat on the floor, leave light and fan on. Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake **** at her and make woo-hoo noise. Again. Throw wet towel on bed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neil Posted January 24, 2004 Report Share Posted January 24, 2004 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rick O'Shea Posted January 24, 2004 Report Share Posted January 24, 2004 Me and the wife have just peed ourselves reading that! Very good and very very true! :*) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
red_stag88 Posted January 24, 2004 Report Share Posted January 24, 2004 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BTMS Posted January 25, 2004 Report Share Posted January 25, 2004 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leon Posted January 25, 2004 Report Share Posted January 25, 2004 so true!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Butchers Dog Posted January 25, 2004 Report Share Posted January 25, 2004 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Columbus Polumbus Posted January 26, 2004 Report Share Posted January 26, 2004 I just got a B******in at work for laughing so much............ but its so true... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ollie Posted January 26, 2004 Report Share Posted January 26, 2004 but did you's notice that the wife didn't wash the conditioner out of her hair after leaving it in for 15 minutes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BIG BILL Posted January 27, 2004 Report Share Posted January 27, 2004 Brill" Keep em coming BIG BILL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dead-eye-dick Posted January 27, 2004 Report Share Posted January 27, 2004 I just got a B******in at work for laughing so much............ but its so true... Me too - very good. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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