NorfolkBoy Posted April 26, 2007 Report Share Posted April 26, 2007 How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened when she brings it ------------------------------------------------------------------- Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you. -------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink. ------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..." ------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you fix a woman's watch? You don't. There is a clock on the oven. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do men **** more than women? Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure. ------------------------------------------------------------------- If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in. ------------------------------------------------------------------- What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig? A woman who won't do what she's told ------------------------------------------------------------------- I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%. It's called Wedding Cake. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do men die before their wives? They want to. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy. ------------------------------------------------------------------- In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suffolk shooter Posted April 26, 2007 Report Share Posted April 26, 2007 SS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pavman Posted April 26, 2007 Report Share Posted April 26, 2007 Scientists have discovered a food that diminishesa woman's sex drive by 90%. It's called Wedding Cake. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axe Posted April 26, 2007 Report Share Posted April 26, 2007 very good Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
naddan28 Posted April 26, 2007 Report Share Posted April 26, 2007 Brilliant, although Mrs naddan28 is in uproar over that!!! Haps she should be in the kitchen? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monkeyjaimz Posted April 26, 2007 Report Share Posted April 26, 2007 Awesome Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sundodger Posted April 27, 2007 Report Share Posted April 27, 2007 Fantastic I was in fits and the other half even managed a smile Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Highlander Posted April 27, 2007 Report Share Posted April 27, 2007 Oooops I just let Ms H read that and boy are you in for a rough time next visit Personally I thought it was damn funny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
berettaman1 Posted April 27, 2007 Report Share Posted April 27, 2007 How many men does it take to open a beer?None. It should be opened when she brings it ------------------------------------------------------------------- Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you. -------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink. ------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..." ------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you fix a woman's watch? You don't. There is a clock on the oven. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do men **** more than women? Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure. ------------------------------------------------------------------- If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first? The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in. ------------------------------------------------------------------- What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig? A woman who won't do what she's told ------------------------------------------------------------------- I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%. It's called Wedding Cake. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do men die before their wives? They want to. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy. ------------------------------------------------------------------- In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created Man and rested. Then God created Woman. Since then, neither God nor Man has rested. hee hee hee, oh great, your the kind of bloke my wife says i am ,ha ha ha ha. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Dog Posted April 27, 2007 Report Share Posted April 27, 2007 My wife is out shopping, I can't wait to she get back in Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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