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Taking roadkill


Dirty Harry
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I can't remember ever reading that in one of the Acts, but have always understood that to be the case.

 

It would be interesting if someone could find out exactly what Act it is in.

 

That's what I have been trying to do....

 

Bunny Bagger,

 

I think someone was pulling your chain on that one...

 

Harry

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About 15 years ago I had just taken delivery of a new company Estate Car. It was literally hours old when a Roe Buck decided to take me on on a stretch of the A419 just outside Cirencester. The animal came of worse but was not killed instantly. Being late at night and generally deserted I stopped the car and dispatched the suffering animal ( both front legs were broken ) with a few blows to the bonce with a lump hammer from my tool box.

 

As I proceeded to load it into the back of the car the local GK came through the woods in his landy and started shouting and bellowing that I was comitting an offence and had used the motor car to illegally poach a deer contrary to the 1756 game preservation act or something similar. It was obvious he had been having a few sups after dogging in his birds and was taking a short cut from the hostelry and was three sheets to to the wind. I explained that they didnt have cars in 1756 or whenever it was and he said he was going to call the police. Being a rather well known phsyco with the scars from several imbittered battles with the local travellers adorning his face, I decided discretion was indeed the better part of valour and relinquished any claim on the poor deceased beast.

 

Before he left I aked him to sign a hastely written receipt for the deer and let me have his name and address. What the **** for he spluttered. "well I explained its your legal property, as you rightly pointed out and my insurance company will need to know where to send the repair bill for my radiator and bonnet."

 

After much deliberation and discussion (almost ending in a good beating for me*) some 30 minutes later I left the scene with deer in boot and a feeling of satisfaction at my conquest. I think that my agreement at the time to him summoning the police swayed it as I politely pointed out to him that he was in all probability well over the legal limit.

 

Unfortunately my boss at the time was not best pleased with the transaction particularly as the repair bill was some £600 and I only got £25 for the deer !

 

*In all probability I could have took him as he was only about 8 stone wringing wet and I... 6ft and 16 stone of rippling muscle

 

FM.

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What's even worse is when someone can't bare to dispatch an animal they have wounded. :rolleyes: I had a bunny hugger come into school a while back and announce 'we accidently hit a rabbit in the lanes yesterday, both it's back legs were hanging off' I asked how they had killed it afterwards. The reply I got was something along these lines 'Killing rabbits is mean even if you have already hit them on the road, I'm sure it's family will look after it.'

 

We had a squirrel run out into the side of the wheel of the car a couple of weeks ago. We stopped and I got out to check it was dead. It wasn't. Thoughts ran through my head about Pin claiming he necks them. :no: I have enough sense to realise that the squirrel would probably come off better if I tried necking it so just placed the heel of my size 8 Hunter's on it's head. It expired quite quickly.

 

FM :o

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