BTMS Posted September 14, 2006 Report Share Posted September 14, 2006 Driving to the office this morning on the Motorway, I looked over to my right and there was a woman in a brand new Mercedes doing 90mph with her face up close to her rear vision mirror putting on her eyeliner! I looked away for a couple of seconds and when I looked back, she was halfway over in my lane still working on that makeup! It scared me (I'm a man) so much that I dropped my electric shaver, which knocked the bacon roll out of my other hand. In all the confusion of trying to straighten out the car using my knees against the steering wheel, it knocked my mobile from my ear, which fell into the coffee between my legs, causing it to splash and burn BIG JIM AND THE TWINS, causing me to scream, which made me drop the cigarette out of my mouth, ruining my shirt and disconnected an important call! BLOODY WOMEN DRIVERS! (Now taking cover and excluding MRS from the site) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fiiish1987 Posted September 14, 2006 Report Share Posted September 14, 2006 :look: excellent. have you changed your name and address yet? you can be sure you'll need to after that post! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axe Posted September 14, 2006 Report Share Posted September 14, 2006 Big jim and the twins. Actually, I think drivers in general are getting far to impatient and seem to have an overwhelming idea that they actually own the road and your not permitted to actually apply the Highway Code to thier driving. I was returning from Wembley and was driving past Heathrow on a section of the M25, on Tuesday. There were two young girls in a hot hatch driving the fast lane. I watched the driver attempt to undertake on several occasions. She did this by constantly looking behind her and worrying about the car infront. After unsuccesful attempts of actually pulling over, she decided to simply pull acroos into the path of the oncoming car, which had to perform an emergency procedure to avoid collision. The girls just laughed and carried on. Worryingly enough though, the same thing happened by a chap driving, you guesed it, a BMW darting in and out. No indication or thought to anyone else. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cranfield Posted September 14, 2006 Report Share Posted September 14, 2006 BTMS, I enjoyed that. :look: :look: We all see lots of examples of the idiots on mobiles and round here, its the map reading while driving ones that are the worse. The strangest thing I ever saw was when crawling round the M25 one evening. All lanes were doing about 20 mph and when I glanced at the driver on my left, who was a bloke in his 50's, he was sucking his thumb. I looked again and again and there was no doubt, he had his right thumb in his mouth, with the index finger stroking his nose. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dunkield Posted September 14, 2006 Report Share Posted September 14, 2006 I can laugh about it now, but when I was a field service engineer, I used to have my map on my lap, diary or PDA on top of that, and then at lunchtime - well you can guess the rest! We ALWAYS used our phones whilst driving, and if I told you how often I was done for speeding you wouldn't beleive me Not big or clever, but we were all under immense pressure to get to that next job in time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axe Posted September 14, 2006 Report Share Posted September 14, 2006 The funniest moment ever was on again on the M25 about a year after they had introduced the variable speed limits/cameras. I was on my way up north with my brother on a business trip. We were approaching the M3 junction and had been driving in the variable 50MPH limit following a guy in an Audi. He had been dodging in and out of the traffic, undertaking and speeding up in between the cameras. At one point he cut us up. On this last stretch towards the M3 he had been frustrated as other drivers had prevented him from undertakeing. He then managed to get into a gap and floored the gas pedal only to go through the speed camera at what we estimated to be 80 MPH. To our amusement the camera went off twice and the guy had realised this and proceeded to thump the roof and steering wheel of his car. My brother in hysterics looked accross as he came level with us, held up 5 fingers and mouthed 50mph. The guys expression was priceless. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
old rooster Posted September 14, 2006 Report Share Posted September 14, 2006 Driving to the office this morning on the Motorway, I looked over to my right and there was a woman in a brand new Mercedes doing 90mph with her face up close to her rear vision mirror putting on her eyeliner! I looked away for a couple of seconds and when I looked back, she was halfway over in my lane still working on that makeup! It scared me (I'm a man) so much that I dropped my electric shaver, which knocked the bacon roll out of my other hand. In all the confusion of trying to straighten out the car using my knees against the steering wheel, it knocked my mobile from my ear, which fell into the coffee between my legs, causing it to splash and burn BIG JIM AND THE TWINS, causing me to scream, which made me drop the cigarette out of my mouth, ruining my shirt and disconnected an important call! BLOODY WOMEN DRIVERS! (Now taking cover and excluding MRS from the site) This has to be a solicitors dream !!!!! Think of all the compensation you could claim: Burnt the poor old family jewels with hot coffee, already a precedent set for that one after some stupid women did a similar thing and got a massive pay out, no doubt some infringements of your civil liberties have taken place here and post traumatic stress is bound to be involved somewhere in this lot. Loss of earnings due to the burns (scalds ?) loss of sex drive (remember the ***** ******* that Martin didn't shoot properly putting in a claim for this !) Damaged clothing, knackered mobile phone, the list goes on. I'd get some legal aid right away, must be a retirement package in there somewhere :look: :look: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Highlander Posted September 14, 2006 Report Share Posted September 14, 2006 This has to be a solicitors dream !!!!! Think of all the compensation you could claim: Burnt the poor old family jewels with hot coffee, already a precedent set for that one after some stupid women did a similar thing and got a massive pay out, no doubt some infringements of your civil liberties have taken place here and post traumatic stress is bound to be involved somewhere in this lot. Loss of earnings due to the burns (scalds ?) loss of sex drive (remember the ***** ******* that Martin didn't shoot properly putting in a claim for this !) Damaged clothing, knackered mobile phone, the list goes on. I'd get some legal aid right away, must be a retirement package in there somewhere :look: :look: Not a chance for BTMS he's a WASP (well maybe C) and not from abroad (unless you count that bonny place) more likely they'll sue him and win Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lurcherboy Posted September 14, 2006 Report Share Posted September 14, 2006 Made my day Brian and the wife says you are a pig LB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mossy835 Posted September 14, 2006 Report Share Posted September 14, 2006 Made my day Brian and the wife says you are a pig LB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BTMS Posted September 15, 2006 Author Report Share Posted September 15, 2006 Sorry lads cannot hear a thing I have ringing in both ears (something to do with a left and right hand well placed to both ears) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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