Hodmedod.one Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 I watched Ray and the worn out toothed gnomes offering last night. Bang goes the rifle and the next thing we see is him dragging a gralloched deer into camp. Two minutes later and the bloody thing has been skinned off-screen as well. For how much we saw of him harvesting and preparing the beast, he might as well have nipped down to Waitrose and bought a lump of polystyrene trayed, cling filmed **** off the shelf. I appreciate the fact that he is not allowed to kill a deer with his home made bow (assuming that he did actually make it) and the arrow that he made, but for christ's sake we should have been able to watch him shoot it with a rifle. As for the gralloching and skinning, if you don't want to see a bit of blood and guts, you shouldn't be watching this type of programme and can always turn it off it offends you. Now we come to where he was preparing the strips of venison prior to smoking it. If thats the best that he can do with his Ray Mears Dog's Danglies Bushcraft Knife (yours for only £200+ ) god help him. To coin a well known phrase, he shaped like a whore at a christening. I could do a better job with a sharpened hacksaw blade with a bit of gaffer tape for a handle. Then because he is a such a fat pie eating lazy *** he had to get the Gurkhas to dig a pit and light a fire for him. I used to like watching his survival tecniques programmes, but think this latest effort is ****. Most of the stuff that they prepare is so burnt to ******* that it looks inedible anyway. It's about time he bucked his ideas up. I shall now don my tin helmet, retire to my underground bunker and await the torrent of death threats from all his die-hard fans. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pin Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 Agree, I bet he wanted to show it, but the bean counters who run TV wouldn't have let him for fear of complaints from work-shy fop-haired soap-dodging layabout crusty "animal lover" types. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mungler Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 I haven't watched this series primarily because of the dullard beardy he has in tow. However, each time big Ray comes on the telly my wife makes the reasoned comment that you don't get that big on exercise and living off the land, that is unless the land doth deliver up Big Macs. As an exercise in humour, next time you see him in the middle of nowhere, imagine a large silver panelled tea and pie wagon trailing 20 feet behind him just out of camera shot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Axe Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 Well in contrast, I thoroughly enjoyed it. the gnome makes me laugh but all credit to the man, he'll eat anything! I was a little dissapointed not to have seen more of his stalk but it was before the watershed so im not surprised. In all honesty I would have been pretty dissapointed if he had spent most of the program stalking, gralloching and butchering the animal as well. What the program does offer is an insight into how our ancestors may have lived and for that he gets a thumbs up from me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pin Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 I've oft wondered about that. He's always walking and canoeing and climbing and living off harvested berries and that, how come he's such a lardarse? Surely some of this exercise he does would keep him slim, or is nettle tea incredibly high GI/carb? You might be right Mungler, last night there was only a couple of legs of that deer, so I guess he had the rest made into a lardy burger and scoffed it off camera. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
palombier Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 Have to agree with Hod on this one, the format is all a bit tired and it seemed to me neither one thing nor the other. One minute he is foraging for seeds, the next he is bringing out ready made pastry to make a tart. And the deer stalking scene was laughable..oh look at these fresh tracks and then all of a sudden he has a deer in his sights(supposedly) and hey presto! I spoke to an acquaintance who had been on one of his early courses and he(Mears) was showing people how to skin a rabbit with a bit of flint (his birthstone). Fine for the first bit ,but then he starts paring the skin away with it instead of pulling it off with his hands which we all know is a 2 minute job. I quite like some of what he has to tell us but there is a lot of flannel along the way. The first episode they found 'an eel' under some rocks. Wrong it was a butterfish. I could go on.. Regards P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul in North Lincs. Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 I've said it before, and I'll say it again.......................Ray Mears is the man; I never miss an episode...and can watch it all day long.............. just can't wait to get to get lost in the wildernesssometime so I can start 'tin cannin' for trout and brewing nettle soup............The 'bush tucker man' aint got nothing on me Is it me but does his limpet and razor fish fry ups make you mouth drool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pin Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 I think the problem is the makers trying to strike a balance. To the layperson those programs are probably a bit hardcore, to the outdoors type person they don't go into anywhere near enough detail. In trying to strike a balance I think its in the hands of the marketing and market research people, demographics and all that. Its unlikely that something pre-watershed would ever sate the exigent appetite of the outdoors man Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kip270 Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 Well i told the other half that he was on and if there was any other programme she wanted to watch,TUFF. Within 20 mins i was in the land of nod,(she was not impressed ) just didn't grab me at all, and it hasn't bothered me at all that i have missed them Not Ray Mears thing at all i don't think, i wonder who had the say so on how this programmes format should be, some city person without a scoobie of the wilderness He seems to huff and puff a lot as well you would think someone who trys to live off the land would be a bit healthier. (maybe he cooks for the programme then heads off for a few big mac's ) sorry mungler didn't read your post Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lancs Lad Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 Its a bit dissapointing. Was really looking forward to this being UK based. A real good UK forraging show. I do enjoy the show though, yes its annoying that you dont see the gutting etc, but think thats just the softies in the big house saying we cant show that... And who ever said that he might as well just have unwrapped it was right too... I would love to know what I could pick up when Im out beating, shrooms etc etc.................and thats why I would really love a UK based show.. But then again,,,have we cocked the country side up that much that he has to go to places like scandanavia etc to find what hes looking for..... As for the food side...............I just fancy muching on some grass cakes.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hodmedod.one Posted January 25, 2007 Author Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 I haven't watched this series primarily because of the dullard beardy he has in tow. However, each time big Ray comes on the telly my wife makes the reasoned comment that you don't get that big on exercise and living off the land, that is unless the land doth deliver up Big Macs. As an exercise in humour, next time you see him in the middle of nowhere, imagine a large silver panelled tea and pie wagon trailing 20 feet behind him just out of camera shot. Glad to see I'm not the only one who thinks that the figures on his calorie intake/energy expenditure spreadsheet don't quite balance. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorfolkBoy Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 This guy Bear Grylls popped up on the Discovery Channel over here a couple of weeks ago... Anyone heard of him? Ex-British Special Forces and a bit slimmer that Ray.. http://www.beargrylls.com/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
njc110381 Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 I really enjoyed the programme myself. It's been said already, the big chiefs probably wouldn't let him show the whole job on the deer. They have to cater for the leaf munchers who watch him, they'd be crying into their lentils if they had to watch him grallock the deer on set Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wickedandlazee Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 This guy Bear Grylls popped up on the Discovery Channel over here a couple of weeks ago... Anyone heard of him? Ex-British Special Forces and a bit slimmer that Ray.. http://www.beargrylls.com/ Yeah I've seen him on that legionairre programme that was on over here where they went through 6 weeks of foreign legion training - it was pretty good - at first I thought he was a bit of a toff but the more I watched it I realised it was just his accent Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wookie Posted January 25, 2007 Report Share Posted January 25, 2007 I read in a magazine interview with Ray that the reason he's a bit lardy is the time spent in hotels before and after as shoot and also the travelling to and from the place where they are filming. There's a lot of decent food about and it would be rude not to take the hotel up on it... That said, I do a lot of that and I'm carrying a lot less excess that Ray. Mind you, he's probably a dman site fitter than me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SNAKEBITE Posted January 26, 2007 Report Share Posted January 26, 2007 Well a fair few of you have picked holes in the programme but just a few points............ Could you survive in a "megolithic" age? When scratching out a living would you really be that bothered how you skinned your lunch? "Oh I made a bit of a mess of that, I'll just go get another one", no I don't think so. The programme is balanced and if anyone really is interested then they can go further and discover more. At the end of the day Ray could out live us all in a survival situation, he would be living the life of Riley whilst anyone of us here would have died, and for that he has my upmost respect. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr W Posted January 26, 2007 Report Share Posted January 26, 2007 I imagine that his girth is purely to keep himself warm when he's living in a tent in the artic (I know that's my excuse, bit of winter insulation) I wonder if there is a Mrs Mears she must get quite hacked off with him disappearing for months. My Misses calls him Big Gay Ray just to hurt me as I'm always watching his programs on sky even if I've seen them several times before. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
njc110381 Posted January 26, 2007 Report Share Posted January 26, 2007 My other half calls him all sorts of names too! I have a lot of respect for people like him, considering the majority of his knowledge is self taught (nobody gave a **** about outdoor survival then, he motivated himself to learn). I'm trying to pick up a lot of this stuff, and could probably survive if I had to. Not sure I'd be as comfortable though! I can make smoke wih two sticks which has to be the most fun bit, and also make shelter and find food. It tastes rough though. I don't care what he says, dandelions are not nice spring salad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
16 Bore Posted January 26, 2007 Report Share Posted January 26, 2007 I wonder if there is a Mrs Mears she must get quite hacked off with him disappearing for months. Unfortunately, Mrs. Mears dies of Cancer last year, He has three (I think) children though, wonder where they spent the summer holidays? Ian Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jimdfish Posted January 26, 2007 Report Share Posted January 26, 2007 BIG FAT BLOATER. He eats everything dead mincer like along with his "friend". OOOhh, just take a tiny nibble Gordon and then exaggerate all mouth movements like your Jilly *******' Goolden. Cant afford a Hotel Ray? Well I can. I dont want to live outdoors eating cack. I can skin a rabbit with the best of them but sleeping outdoors is for tramps. You are just a fat stone age big issue seller. Not today Tubby Yeh, and another thing If I told the wife I was getting dressed up like Baden Powells "special friend" and going camping with Gordon who is camper than a jamboree she would leave me. I mean why does he have to wear "short" shorts. Its obscene. Jim P.S FAT FAT FAT FAT. p.s and obscene Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Millomite Posted January 26, 2007 Report Share Posted January 26, 2007 BIG FAT BLOATER. He eats everything dead mincer like along with his "friend". OOOhh, just take a tiny nibble Gordon and then exaggerate all mouth movements like your Jilly *******' Goolden. Cant afford a Hotel Ray? Well I can. I dont want to live outdoors eating cack. I can skin a rabbit with the best of them but sleeping outdoors is for tramps. You are just a fat stone age big issue seller. Not today Tubby Yeh, and another thing If I told the wife I was getting dressed up like Baden Powells "special friend" and going camping with Gordon who is camper than a jamboree she would leave me. I mean why does he have to wear "short" shorts. Its obscene. Jim P.S FAT FAT FAT FAT. p.s and obscene Have you seen the price of his courses as an aside? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul in North Lincs. Posted January 26, 2007 Report Share Posted January 26, 2007 BIG FAT BLOATER. He eats everything dead mincer like along with his "friend". OOOhh, just take a tiny nibble Gordon and then exaggerate all mouth movements like your Jilly *******' Goolden. Cant afford a Hotel Ray? Well I can. I dont want to live outdoors eating cack. I can skin a rabbit with the best of them but sleeping outdoors is for tramps. You are just a fat stone age big issue seller. Not today Tubby Yeh, and another thing If I told the wife I was getting dressed up like Baden Powells "special friend" and going camping with Gordon who is camper than a jamboree she would leave me. I mean why does he have to wear "short" shorts. Its obscene. Jim P.S FAT FAT FAT FAT. p.s and obscene : we do have different opinions...but you my friend, are one very funny bloke *****. Havn't seen you on here for a while either Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SNAKEBITE Posted January 26, 2007 Report Share Posted January 26, 2007 You wouldn't have, he has been camping. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hodmedod.one Posted January 26, 2007 Author Report Share Posted January 26, 2007 Well a fair few of you have picked holes in the programme but just a few points............ Could you survive in a "megolithic" age? When scratching out a living would you really be that bothered how you skinned your lunch? "Oh I made a bit of a mess of that, I'll just go get another one", no I don't think so. The programme is balanced and if anyone really is interested then they can go further and discover more. At the end of the day Ray could out live us all in a survival situation, he would be living the life of Riley whilst anyone of us here would have died, and for that he has my upmost respect. His plethora of camping kit didn't look very mesolithic, neither did the 4x4 they were packing it into at the end of the programme. If he had used a bit of flint to cut up his meat. fair enough. He used his Ray Mears "thank god there are cretins stupid enough to buy these for £200+ 'cos they have my name on them" whoopdee-doo knife and a red polypropylene cutting board (both available from your local Cave Dwellers R Us since 4000bc). There was no excuse for him making a balls up of it. The Gurkhas probably thought he was a right *****. Don't get sucked in by the hype. If Ray was dumped stark ******* naked in the middle of the Arctic he would die just like the rest of us would. If Ray was dumped stark ******* naked in the middle of the Amazon Rain Forest he would survive and soon be living quite comfortably. The chances are most of us would survive too, it would just take us a while to reach his comfort levels. If anyone with half a brain cell was dumped anywhere and given all the kit Ray now takes with him (which costs a sh*tpot full of money) if they couldn't survive, they would be doing the Gene Pool a favour. I like watching Pie-Meister Rays older programmes, but think that his new series has strayed too far from the stuff that he is really good at. Sorry to here the news about his missus though BIG FAT BLOATER. He eats everything dead mincer like along with his "friend". OOOhh, just take a tiny nibble Gordon and then exaggerate all mouth movements like your Jilly *******' Goolden. Cant afford a Hotel Ray? Well I can. I dont want to live outdoors eating cack. I can skin a rabbit with the best of them but sleeping outdoors is for tramps. You are just a fat stone age big issue seller. Not today Tubby Yeh, and another thing If I told the wife I was getting dressed up like Baden Powells "special friend" and going camping with Gordon who is camper than a jamboree she would leave me. I mean why does he have to wear "short" shorts. Its obscene. Jim P.S FAT FAT FAT FAT. p.s and obscene You are a funny man Jimdfish Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.