Taff Mason Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 (edited) hello guys, im best man at my brothers wedding on saturday an i need some advice because i've never done it before. im still working on the speach, an looking for a few gags, i like Munglers one about being ''a great cook in the kitchen and a hor.................ticulturalist in the garden'' but i reckon she'll probably start crying an run out might be worth a go though. and any advice on what i need to do on the day would be great too thanks, TAFF Edited May 20, 2008 by Taff Mason Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr W Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 Start writing the speech about 3 months before the wedding........doh! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taff Mason Posted May 20, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 yeah i know that now, who'd of thought it would be so hard Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dusk2dawn Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 hello guys, im best man at my brothers wedding on saturday an i need some advice because i've never done it before. im still working on the speach, an looking for a few gags, i like Munglers one about being ''a great cook in the kitchen and a hor.................ticulturalist in the garden'' but i reckon she'll probably start crying an run out might be worth a go though. and any advice on what i need to do on the day would be great too thanks, TAFF Write down a few factual bulletpoints about the groom, then the couple.... enlarge around these...... start on a serious note, end with a few jokes about the groom NOT the bride or her mother Hope this gives you something to build on, you have left it a bit late D2D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pumpitup Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 Dont envy you mate. Done it twice now, both times more nervous than the bride and groom I reckon! Good advice from D2D, and practice the speech plenty once you've written it. Then jot down some reminders on some small cards so you can refer to them as you go. Best of luck!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maiden22 Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 (edited) . Edited March 10, 2009 by Maiden22 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starlight32 Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 I have never been asked in the whole of my life to be best man... My brother's and sister have all asked people who are nothing to do with the family. I think it is all rather out of order as I am best choice for a factual,unbiased portrait of all the interesting stuff they have done in their life. Even my mother and father said I was not suitable. That is the reason why I wont get married as I tell her indoors- I have no-one to ask as best man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taff Mason Posted May 20, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 cheers for all the advice lads, iv already got a rough speach just touching it up a little. he left it really late to ask me and said ''well i thought you knew i was going to ask you to be best man anyway'' turns out i was the last to know as usual. i'll keep you posted on how i get on too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr W Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 There are also loads of websites with examples of speeches on them, not suggesting you copy one but it might help with the layout and flow of the speech and perhaps a couple of funnies. Only advice I have is to relax and remember the audience is mostly on your side, they've had a nice meal had a few glasses of vino and are ready to have a laugh, they're not going to lynch you.... well unless you tell the one about you ******* the bride the night before. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chard Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 (edited) Very difficult job, I don't envy you that one. My views on speeches are a bit odd In my opinion, as Maiden22 has already said, reading a written speech is a huge mistake. If you close your eyes and listen, you can tell when somebody is reading a speech or even referring too much to notes. They do sound very wooden, and I find it very hard to listen to. The theory is that you should know this person well enough to be able to stand up and spout about them without having it written down . Kind of "straight from the heart" and all that happy ****. I've only been best man twice, and both times, I didn't refer to notes. Both times went OK, once very well but then again, I am a total gob****. Once I start spouting, I'm quite difficult to stop. If you don't have a runaway gob, then it's not that easy, but if you can get a few ideas in order in your mind, it's not as difficult as it sounds. It certainly sounds much better than reading it from a sheet of paper. It's this type of speaking that requires some practice, even if you only speak to yourself in the mirror. Get it so you're reasonably confident that you can remember the general content that you intend to say and have a couple of beers beforehand to help you relax, but DON'T get trousered or even slightly merry because then you WILL forget what you were going to say, until after you've finished, when it will all come flooding back Good luck on the day, mate. You sound like a confident sort of bloke, so I don't reckon you'll have any problems It's worth mentioning that the second time I was best man, when I thought it was "OK" rather than good, I'd had far too much to drink. It was one of those rambling do's that go on and on and Ariston and you just drink, slowly and steadily all day and never really feel drunk, but I must have had loads by the time I stood up. Because I wasn't actually drunk, it was OK, but I did forget a couple of important bits of what I intended to say Edited May 20, 2008 by Chard Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JJaxeman Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 Good advice from all have been through it myself three times now bullet notes on cards is the best advice and secondly don't drink to much before the speach I learnt the hard way could hardly focus LOL LOL LOL Good Luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ferretman Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 i gave my mum away when i was 15 and the speach well i ant going to say no more lol.my best mate has started his already and i dont get marrid till next year lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gixer1 Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 I was once at a wedding and the best man started off his speech - " It's been a very emotional day.......even the cake's in tiers" which got a good round of applause... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr lee Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 I have done it 3 times now and it doesn't get easier. If your mate and his new wife is quite easy going and you have a good 'audience' then try what I did last time round. Go to a locksmiths, get about 30 blank keys and pay him a set amount with a promise to return them all and he keeps £20 or so. Hand the keys out to as many of the guys as possible just before the meal discreetly and tell them to bring them back when asked. In your speech finish with 'Now that *wifes name* is married and officially off the dating scene, could all those guys who still have keys to the back door of *wifes name* house please return them now as *husbands name* is changing the locks.' All the guys you handed keys to should walk out and put the keys on the top table with a sad look upon their face. Guaranteed a laugh. Good luck with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BSA Shaun Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 (edited) My best man got me with a right good 'un. "Shaun used to be a keen farmer, until wages etc took its toll, however his past interest is still reflected in his ex-girlfriends!" Never forget that one, I tell you! Edited May 20, 2008 by BSA Shaun Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim145 Posted May 21, 2008 Report Share Posted May 21, 2008 When I was best man for my Bro I raided my parents loft for around twenty embarasing old photo's (not too hard as he used to be a new romantic) I made enough copies so there was a set for every table. I then bunged a set on each table in a big brown sealed envelope. When I stood up to start my speach I instructed everyone to open the envelopes - everyone was in hysterics for five mins! I made quite a short speach after with a couple of light hearted digs at my brother - job done I got lots of people after saying how much they enjoyed it As has been said above, learn it and don't get ****** before hand! Oh, and Good Luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UnclePete Posted May 22, 2008 Report Share Posted May 22, 2008 Jolly good luck to you. I would say keep it short, keep it sincere, and don't try to be the comedian unless that's the natural you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mossy835 Posted May 22, 2008 Report Share Posted May 22, 2008 i done it 1 time and that was the last,no more Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
charadam Posted May 22, 2008 Report Share Posted May 22, 2008 You could try......... "As Marjory (insert name of actual bride ***) came into church, her Dad whispered to me her last few words as a single woman. She told him that the Vicar had said all she had to do was remember that she would walk down the aisle, they would kneel by the altar and that the solemnisation of marriage would be celebrated by a hymn or two. As she came up the aisle on her Dad's arm, her Dad heard her recite in time with the Wedding March: I'll....... Alter....... Him............" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BSA Shaun Posted May 23, 2008 Report Share Posted May 23, 2008 Never forget the 3 rings of marriage......... Engagement ring Wedding ring and Suffering Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taff Mason Posted May 25, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 25, 2008 (edited) hiya lads, thanks for all the advice. it went brilliantly yesterday!!! i decided to jot down a few bullet points in case i forgot the speech. which was just as well because i got stuck twice but managed to just keep chatting while i looked down and it all blended in seamlesly. i had the whole room in fits of laughter an i still managed to keep it quite sincere and personal to my brother and his new wife. i was absolutely terified though, but everyone came up and shook my hand to say how good my speech was. i eventually staggered out of the hotel around about 4am. i hardly had to buy a single drink all night. thanks for all the advice Taff Mason Edited May 25, 2008 by Taff Mason Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chard Posted May 25, 2008 Report Share Posted May 25, 2008 hiya lads, thanks for all the advice. it went brilliantly yesterday!!! i decided to jot down a few bullet points in case i forgot the speech. which was just as well because i got stuck twice but managed to just keep chatting while i looked down and it all blended in seamlesly. i had the whole room in fits of laughter an i still managed to keep it quite sincere and personal to my brother and his new wife. i was absolutely terified though, but everyone came up and shook my hand to say how good my speech was. i eventually staggered out of the hotel around about 4am. i hardly had to buy a single drink all night. thanks for all the advice Taff Mason Fantastic Well done mate, glad you did well. Scary isn't it?. Bet you were glad when you'd finished Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taff Mason Posted May 25, 2008 Author Report Share Posted May 25, 2008 Fantastic Well done mate, glad you did well. Scary isn't it?. Bet you were glad when you'd finished cheers mate, yeah its one of the scariest thing i've had to do definately glad when it was over though, i could just chill out and have a few beers then Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mossy835 Posted May 25, 2008 Report Share Posted May 25, 2008 would you do it again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chard Posted May 25, 2008 Report Share Posted May 25, 2008 would you do it again. I think it's one of those things where it's very hard to say no I couldn't say no, you're supposed to be honoured and all that When a good mate asks you, I just couldn't imagine knocking him back The second time I did it, I knew it was coming and I thought "Oh ****" but the acceptance was out of my gob before I had the brain in gear Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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