Dougy Posted January 21, 2018 Report Share Posted January 21, 2018 I don't normally, but nearly wet myself just. The Mrs is watching dancing on ice and asked if the ice is hard, the rugby player did a lift that could have ended in a nasty fall (apparently) I said yes it would be hard if it was still frozen, and kept my head down in my tablet as I answered. She said what you laughing at. Lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Mighty Prawn Posted January 21, 2018 Report Share Posted January 21, 2018 When I saw the title wife statement I thought there was a way of finding out their financial impact on our lives! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JimLondon Posted January 21, 2018 Report Share Posted January 21, 2018 I seriously could take this thread over with Mrs London’s statements. I’ll submit my favourite, we were sitting on the top deck of a bus going down regent street when she piped up, and not quietly either “who on earth would name an airline polish airlines” the polish said as a buffer,shine product not something from Poland. a bloke looked at me with that sympathetic “ you poor sod” look and I looked back with that “thanks bud”look Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
guzzicat Posted January 22, 2018 Report Share Posted January 22, 2018 Enjoying a seafood meal with Mrs Guzzicat I slid one mussell into it;s neighbours shell so the two nestled alongside each other,& then said " Oh look a double yoker" She was rather excited Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
strimmer_13 Posted January 22, 2018 Report Share Posted January 22, 2018 not me personally but my ex boss convinced his wife while on a road trip - that the cows stood on the hill next to the road (which she was asking about) have been bred to have shorter legs one side than the other. He explained that's how they stand there all day and different ones are bred to face the other way. Months of **** taking after. Years on still makes me chuckle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
haynes Posted January 22, 2018 Report Share Posted January 22, 2018 Whilst driving past numerous wind turbines I said to her I'm not surprised it's so windy up here with all these turbines blowing. She was convincd that they were the cause. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flyboy1950 Posted January 22, 2018 Report Share Posted January 22, 2018 Talking of wind turbines, when going past a wind farm one day, half the turbines were turning and half not, I said it was due to the fact that there wasn't enough wind to turn them all. That seems right she said, so why did they build so many? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ditchman Posted January 22, 2018 Report Share Posted January 22, 2018 right im going the "other way round"..............in other words....my stupidity............ many years ago (whilst i was still on "active service" with the wife)..................in order to facilitate the act of love making...she asked me to drop by Boots the chemist and get some "lubricant for you know where".......and her parting words before i went of to Norwich was.. "dont forget to sign the register at the chemists as it is a controlled issue".................. soooo.......off this total muppet goes...i have my coffee and sausage roll in the Britons arms...then off to London street where Boots is............ go to the counter and ask the girl for the product name....she gets it...gives it to me and i ask to sign the register....appears to be some confusion here ..so she goes off to get the chemist....by this time a cue of wimin had built up behind me and they were all ears..........chemist comes back and asks what the problem is...so i say "she told me i need to sign the register as "IT" is a controlled substance.......".............i hear a couple of snorts behind me from the wimin cued up behind me....and the shop assitant who was standing behind the chemist had gone red and tears were flowing out of her eyes............the chemist looked over his glasses at me and assured me in a very professional manner....so BLOODY EVERYONE COULD HEAR........ that i didnt need to sighn the register for vaginal lubricant........ doooooooooooohhhhooioooooo......... talk about embarrasment all thro' my own damn stupidity and the ablility to trust anyone........... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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