tazkb Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 well last week my wife just told me she no longer loves me and left i'm totally gutted, she has taken our daughter and 5yo son but left me with our 11 yo son we have been bickering a bit of late, usually about something and nothing but I never expected anything like this, it's all got a bit crappy now, with her taking her pound of flesh and then some and despite what she has done i still love her and am really hurting, being disabled makes life even harder as i am now having to dig deeper than ever before to get by, even though my son has been truly fantastic. she wont talk or discuss things except by text message. the only thing keeping me focused is i promised my lad to decorate his bedroomas it's well over due, but i'm struggling physically, i could do with some cheap labour is anyone fancies giving me a lift, then i would be extreemly greatfull it's mostly just emulsioning the 4 walls, he wants his room all army bunker style so i'm after some cammo netting if anyone has any they dont want or will sell cheaply please let me know. she has said that she won't be comming back and has allready done so much as too burn bridges, changing things and taking her name of things, I really thought after 13 years we would at least be able to talk things through but she wont, I have realised that i am guilty of letting myself go a bit and think i should probably have done more, but since my heart attack i have been feeling pretty sorry for myself and she says that's part of the problem, still after 13 years of trying my best to keep her happy you would have thought she wouldn't just cut and run I have been thrown in at the deep end to sort stuff out and it's not helped being disabled I have been trying to do too much and now i'm in really bad pain from the FM, not sleeping either and trying not to upset my 11yo son as everytime I cry he gets upset as well. don't know what else to do really, sorting my son as i say is keeping me focused but the pain both mental and physical is awfull so if any of you guys on here that know me have the odd hour to spare I would love some help painting and if there is anyone with some cheap or free cammo netting that would be a massive help, i could also do with anything army related,ammo box's empty bullet brass army signs anything like that, sorry to moan but i'm really gobsmacked, i just can't believe she has gone without a fight, i'm fighting and i hope maybe she might think twice but she has allready been sorting out somewhere to live etc tanks Taz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fergie Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 i left the army about 6 months ago mate i will have a dig about see what i can find cant promise anything mind if i was closer i would of helped you pain foc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smig4373 Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 Mate...I feel for you my friend...Im not going to bombard you with cliches that you've probably heard before....Get your friends round,dont sit on your own thinking about it..i know its hard.....Go to the docs to address the pain..and try and keep your pekker up dude... :good: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fisherman Mike Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 Best wishes to you you will be OK... There is professional help out there if things get desperate...remember that and dont be too proud to ask your local social services department or other family members.. Its terrible when a long term relationship breaks down but sometimes it turns out to be the best thing...as it was in my case.. Be strong. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silpig5 Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 feel for ya bud , bin there myself but you need to focuss on the future , and as my brief told me many years ago its everyman for himself . if the bank is in joint names , suspend it . get the papers for the house checked so you cant be out on ya harris . put any savings you have in brothers / sisters name . whilst you are still married you cant do anything after she cleans you out . i know it sounds harsh but sorry things like that happen . i came home to 3 empty bank accounts and a morgage that wasnt paid for 3 months ! chin up , be there and strong for ya boy . coz it will only get bitter and twisted as it draws out . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
den5008 Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 I know what your going through mate,been in the same situation myself,just got to be strong for the lads sake remember he must be hurting like hell as well. pm me your Address and I will send some camo netting free of charge Remember chin up all the best Den Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JR1960 Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 Been there recently too mate, bit far to help with the painting but if you pm me your address i'll have a dig about see what i can find on the Army stuff front, must have something laying about. I know its hard but keep strong for your boy and i'm sure the lads on here will rally round. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikky Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 pm sent mikky Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
M.I.A Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 Stay strong fella, pm me your address I will get some empty brass sent to you ATB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
955i Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 Sorry to hear this mate. My wife did the same thing (ironically also after 13 years). Bit too far to help with the decorating, but if you want to chat/vent to someone who has been there, feel free to PM me anytime. Keep your chin up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CZ550Kevlar Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 Has someone been putting something in the water recently, far too much heartbreak going on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gordon R Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 Keith - very sorry to hear your news. Hope things get better. Regards. Gordon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
digger Posted March 18, 2012 Report Share Posted March 18, 2012 Hope things work out for you mate. Ive been through it as have others. Its important to remember you are not alone and you have friends and family who care deeply about you. However dark it may seem their support will see you through this time. Pm me your address, be glad to help if I can. Hope things work out for you mate. Ive been through it as have others. Its important to remember you are not alone and you have friends and family who care deeply about you. However dark it may seem their support will see you through this time. Pm me your address, be glad to help if I can. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bullet boy Posted March 19, 2012 Report Share Posted March 19, 2012 Sorry to hear of this mate. It happened to me 13 years ago when my wife of ten years told me she didn't love me anymore.My two boys were 7 and 5 at the time so it was tough for me as I went back to my parents to live which was 25 miles away. My way of thinking was to keep around my close friends who were nothing short of brilliant.My two mates were with me everyday making sure that I was holding up. I bought some new clothes and although times were hard I wanted to show my wife that I wasn't going to hit the bottle or crumble because of this but wanted to show her that I was better off without her even though I really wanted her! Through all the tough times I remained calm was very civil and always seen my boys on time and even brought them back to her on time. My advice to you mate would be keep around your son and also your friends,try not to dwell on things and you WILL get over this! I thought my world had ended at the time but deep down I always knew there was someone else out there for me!My second wife is 13 years younger than me and we now have a 19 month old little boy.My life is now better than ever before!! Keep believing and keep trusting!As I said you WILL get through it Taz. ATB mate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rushjob Posted March 19, 2012 Report Share Posted March 19, 2012 +1 on that ^^ My ex wife went over the side after 22 years without a warning, did the moping bit but good mates pulled me through it. I refused to enter a new year being a miserable *** and after a few months met a very nice lady who is now Mrs Rushjob, she loves going on holiday on the bike, doesn't moan when I go shooting and I now have myself a fantastic step daughter too. Life for the last 5 years has been awesome. It can be for you too Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gamekeeper1960 Posted March 19, 2012 Report Share Posted March 19, 2012 Hi fellar, "bin there done that" but at least you have your son with you and thats the thing to keep focused on. when it happend to me she took my daughter an left me with my son ( mind he told her he wouldnt go and he was only 9 at the time) the one good thing is He helped me as much I help Him , we probable ended up doing more together than we would if his mother was still there and as a result we have a great relastionship. Hes now nineteen and a well grounded to boot,in fact most of the local girls reakon he alway sure they get home safe from the pubs clubs and hes more careing than the rest of the lads who only seem to care about themselfs.So chap I feel for you but remember to enjoy having your son with you and spoil him as much as you can believe me you'll have as much fun doing it as he does Dave. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shaun4860 Posted March 19, 2012 Report Share Posted March 19, 2012 Im sure im not the only one wondering this, Why did she only take 2 of the children? Is the older one not hers? chin up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OddJob Posted March 19, 2012 Report Share Posted March 19, 2012 Good luck fella, sounds like you've got a lot to deal with. Get some new activities done or a new hobby or something that is just you. Don't be on your own, don't drink, make new roads in life that are about you. Say yes to new things, anything. Live for what life is now, don't dwell to much on what is gone. It will heal, it just takes time and there is no speeding that up. All the best squire. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
storme37 Posted March 19, 2012 Report Share Posted March 19, 2012 agree with what someone else said 5 years on you will prob be happy with a better model Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikky Posted March 25, 2012 Report Share Posted March 25, 2012 hiya keith....nice to eventually meet up with you and your lad..you have got quite a few problems on your plate,looks like you are heading in the right direction,hope those few bits go towards sorting your lads room out,if i can find those targets i will post them over to you,failing that i will ask my lad to email his mate when he gets back from afghan.. mikky mikky Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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