Big Marty Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 Just got a phone call from a mate to say his lad had died, and he apologised to me for ringing while Iam on holiday that's the sort of caring type he is. Anyway his lad was 23 and died from overdose of Drink and Drugs. Now this lad god rest his soul, was given every chance in life that parents could give a son and still headed this direction. Suppose what Iam thinking is that self destruct element in some people when there born or do they learn from others ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scully Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 I think there are as many reasons for peoples addiction as there are substances to get addicted to. There are many deprived children who go on to great achievements despite their backgrounds and there are those who have every opportunity given to them and hit the self-destruct button,and all the multitude of variations in between.Who can say for certain? What I do know is that no one sets out deliberately to become an addict. There's a bloke in town who is an alcoholic.He is heading towards 50 now and at 11am last Sunday morning when coming back from our shoot I saw his eldest daughter who is 16,helping him along the street.He was absolutely out of it;his skin is starting to turn yellow,his clothes are hanging off his skeleton thin body and he looks about 80.Absolutely tragic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archie-fox Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 my sister-in law is in that situation, could of had anything she wanted in life...but fell in with the wrong crowd, now shes in and out of jail and wont be around for much longer looking at her.. once those druggs get hold of you your done for... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peskyfoxs Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 My old boss died at 28 from alchohol, he just wouldn't stop drinking, his company was doing well, he had a nice car, house and a wife with 2 kids one being only 6 months old when his wife woke up to find him derad next to her in bed. I often had to take him home at lun ch when he get blathered at the pub at lunch, he would bring 2ltr coke into the office but we found out it had bacardi in it, such a shame and I do think he knew what he was happening and where it would end up but he couldn't cope with the consequences of not drinking. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
overandunder2012 Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 very sad, i think these desires are in the genes but some people have better control than others and more luck. i think anything enjoyed regularly could be considered an addiction of sorts so i think we all have a little of it in us somewhere but some peoples addictions are for more destructive things than others. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Marty Posted July 31, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 We had a mate grand chap but just to fund of booze, When we would go for a beer he had to stay till he was drunk.I got him a job up in our unit and he loved it and was damn good at it but started to drink a lot after work and then a bit before and then a bit during and then instead of work. He had a wife and 4 great lads that when he finally Drunk himself to Death didn't even go to his funeral because of what he had done to himself. He was 48 when he died and looked 88. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
overandunder2012 Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 (edited) i had a mate he was an accountant dead at 51 found in a chair in his bedroom was drinking at least a litre of vodka a day , was a lovely guy in the last year of his life he borrowed 40k of the bank went round the world on holiday in great hotels came back and died with a fiver in his wallet. nobody had any idea his life was so of the rails Edited July 31, 2013 by overandunder2012 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pinkella Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 Big Marty sorry to read about this, I guess its put a bit of a dampner on your holiday I have mixed feelings about the whole addiction thing and over doses. My only comment or question rather about wanting to die is "Do you want to die forever or do you want to just sleep while the problem is dealt with?" I think for most or all of us, we have all wanted to sleep through a situation at some time in our lives. But if the situation was resolved and you still want to be dead, then that is very sad, very sad indeed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ack-ack Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 Addictions an awful thing, easy for those that have never been affected by it to be blase and sanctimonious about it. Some folk don't help themselves, some folk can't help themselves. We are all different. Sorry to hear your news fella. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keg Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 +1 ack ack. I've never been there myself but watched my sister ruin her life and her family with an addiction to gambling. She ended up with a prison term yet could have had a fabulous life Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
belly47 Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 everybody has an addiction in them. luckily not everyone finds out what theirs is others do and it is definitely an illness, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cosd Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 That's terrible news. No parent should ever have to bury a child.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Marty Posted July 31, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 +1 ack ack. I've never been there myself but watched my sister ruin her life and her family with an addiction to gambling. She ended up with a prison term yet could have had a fabulous lifeGambling is 1 of the worst I think, because although it won't physically do you any harm it can be kept hidden for a long time, and is so easy accessed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pinkella Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 Gambling is 1 of the worst I think, because although it won't physically do you any harm it can be kept hidden for a long time, and is so easy accessed. Especially now you can gamble online! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unapalomablanca Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 (edited) All I can say is, that just achieving an average status in life, seems an incredible success. I used to think that I had to be wealthy at all costs, quite frankly I couldn't give a toss now, a winner and a man is someone who tries his or her best, to do the right thing for those around him, meaning his family and friends and then wider society and of course himself. I reckon there are plenty of people who get into the drink and drug state because they believe the narrative, that you are nothing unless you are a high achiever. Edited July 31, 2013 by unapalomablanca Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ack-ack Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 Especially now you can gamble online! ..............and the TV adverts are virtually back to back of a night, the only break being an advert for a pay day loan company. I can't understand why the gov.com seems to think it's acceptable to promote gambling so heavily. Utter utter madness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Marty Posted July 31, 2013 Author Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 (edited) They think he has been dead for a couple of days,and is mother is blaming herself by thinking if she had gone to see him a few days ago she could of saved his life. My opinion is if he hadn't of died this time it would only have been a matter of time until he did.. This poor woman should have no regrets as she tried everything to help him as did his father,but as parents I suppose you would blame yourself. Edited July 31, 2013 by Big Marty Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry d Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 ... Suppose what Iam thinking is that self destruct element in some people when there born or do they learn from others. Terrible thing to hear. The hardest thing to find out is why something like this happened and in general we will never know. Many young people tend to view risky behaviours as a part of growing up, however there are all kinds of other things that can further send someone on a spiral of self-destruction such as peer pressure, "wrong" friends, wrong place at the wrong time. There are no real answers and as parents we wonder what we could have done differently, but in reality it is no one thing, just a whole load of circumstances that we have little control over. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pimpkiller Posted July 31, 2013 Report Share Posted July 31, 2013 Im firmly in the "drugs are bad" camp just say no because this is exactly the sort of thing that happens. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goodo123 Posted August 1, 2013 Report Share Posted August 1, 2013 I think ultimately it's how people are wired. We are taught at school, shown on tv, told by parents etc thatdrugs are bad, tthat they kill and that their addictive. I'm a smoker, I have tried to quit and it is VERY hard. At the end of the day I blame no one but myself, it's me who started. I don't understand alcohol or drug addiction tho as they seem to demand more and more, if I carried on like that I'd be smoking 200 a day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
novice cushie shooter Posted August 1, 2013 Report Share Posted August 1, 2013 Trouble is younger folk tend to think the done thing is to have x drinks then snort a few lines. It seems to be a social thing even cultural. I was at an engagement party and the ammount of illegal drugs kicking around was shocking. As said before we all have it in us its weather we can ignore it,deal with it or try and be a big man with our friends. OP sorry for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phaedra1106 Posted August 1, 2013 Report Share Posted August 1, 2013 Very sad :( Couple of years ago I was trying to ring a friend and couldn't get hold of her, when I finally did I found she'd been at the hospital and with the police most of the day. Her son (23) had been out for drink on previous evening, no history of drink or drug problems just your average young lad out with his mates for a "good night out". He'd came home around 3am so she went to wake him around 10am, no answer, tried again a couple of times then got that feeling you get when you know something isn't right, went into his bedroom to wake him and he was dead. She was told he'd drank that much alcohol it had killed him, his blood alcohol level was over 450mg :( Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scully Posted August 1, 2013 Report Share Posted August 1, 2013 we were both Trouble is younger folk tend to think the done thing is to have x drinks then snort a few lines. When I was still at school in the early 70's there was a girl who was a complete stunner.Exceptionally good looking,intelligent and from a well to do family.I never bothered chasing her as I realised she was out of my league even though we had a lot in common with the arty farty types.I got a job on leaving school and lost contact but heard all sorts of tales and rumours regarding where she was and who she was mixing with,which turned out to be an arty hippy type commune on the edge of town.I remember feeling quite envious at the time,feeling I was missing out,but unsure as to what. Anyhow,time moves on and she disappeared only to turn up for our school reunion in our 40th year.Hardly recognised her;to say drugs etc had taken their toll would be an understatement.Everyone was shocked to see how ravaged she had become.She sat outside all night glugging shorts and chain smoking. She admitted to me that at the time,she thought she was the coolest thing on the planet,and said she would give anything to able to go back and start again.Great shame. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goodo123 Posted August 1, 2013 Report Share Posted August 1, 2013 Trouble is younger folk tend to think the done thing is to have x drinks then snort a few lines. It seems to be a social thing even cultural. I was at an engagement party and the ammount of illegal drugs kicking around was shocking. As said before we all have it in us its weather we can ignore it,deal with it or try and be a big man with our friends. OP sorry for your loss. I wouldn't say that, not every young person takes drugs, it's the groups you knoc around with, from what I see it's normally a idiot who the group looks up to, it only takes one idiot to take drugs and the others follow like sheep. Seems as tho people in these groups cannot think independently. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twistedsanity Posted August 1, 2013 Report Share Posted August 1, 2013 Cocaine and amphetamines are both stimulants and alcohol is a depressant , people take cocaine to enable them to drink more without passing out and stay up for longer, the stimulant wears off long before the alcohol then the person becomes increasingly more drunk as the booze wins the intoxication battle ( a line of cocaine lasts for about 20 mins) . It's about peer pressure and not being the only one who is asleep drunk in the corner by ten o clock rather than addiction Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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