Jim Sarakun Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 I'll have to admit that I was bought up in a black and white world. Anyone born before 1980 will probably not be able to understand this forth coming gripe. The country is becoming too girly for my liking, it's going down the toilet and I think and hope that Cammeron will change it. My job sends me all over the country and these last few days it sent me to Wales. I love Wales and the people who live there, they are mostly Polish or Lithuanian. Having stopped in the services on the M4 in Welsh Wales I concluded that I needed a dump. Well, I'll have to admit that I have never been so intrigued or fascinated in a WC in all my life. Having sat down to make my deposit to the Welsh economy, I was unexpectedly awakened with a cold jet of water in my crack and on my sack. Now, under other circumstances this would have been a paid for pleasure. Though on this occassion, it was all for free. It seemed that every move I made, would give me a delightful squirt of freezing cold water onto my never exposed or played with parts, well, rarely. So I jiggled and I squirmed in that bog for maybe an hour, just for the hell of it, before the Pakistani attendant decided that, even after my pleas of constipation, I should get out. Now, I have been in these idiot proof dump and go bogs before, but never had the sack and crack cold wash, well, not in England any way. So, is this a Welsh thing? Is this some kind of a conspiracy, to get the UK visitors to return. What do you, the salt of the earth, PW members think? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sha Bu Le Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 mmmmmmmmm?? were you sittng on a bidet? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bruno22rf Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 Idiot!-they are designed to double up as a Sheep trough in case the lady gets thirsty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pheasant Feeder Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 I'm guessing it was the movement sensor type. I personally am not a fan of having the cold under chassis wash, hence have to be in a state of constant readiness to stand up, its worse than going to church! More to the point as you stand to admire your work it is swiftly whisked away before you get the chance. On a similar vein, in some of the services stations they have female attendants, so whilst stood there with your old man out, reading the poster adverts for sat-nav's and malaria in walks a rather plain looking female cleaner. May be I'm old fashioned but it all seems a little too continental for my liking. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Catweazle Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 Are you sure you're in Wales ? Did you get here over a bridge or through the tunnel ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Imperfection Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 That wasnt water being squirted at your rectum. It was thinned down Vaseline and the locals had other plans for you... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
henry d Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 I think it was a 3am kinda thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sha Bu Le Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 Idiot!-they are designed to double up as a Sheep trough in case the lady gets thirsty. +1 :good: :good: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LondonLuke Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 Post of the year! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vipa Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 jim... why would only post 1980 youngsters get the gripe? agree... i'd pay good mony for a service like that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Sarakun Posted October 20, 2012 Author Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 Post 1980 I thought because that is around about when everything started becoming confusing and more electronic so youngsters were bought up with this kind of thing. I think you guys are right though because I got a squirt every time I moved. It even washed my hands, well hand, as I did the paper work. When I win the lottery I plan to buy a cliff side farm with one of those lovely beaches all to itself. I love Wales and actually volunteer to go and work there. Stopped at 2 services, they both had the same spray facility, on the M4 going to and coming from Haverfordwest. It was much warmer there too, than here in East Anglia. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ack-ack Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 Sit on the pan the other way round next time. You can pretend you're in a german film. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clayduster Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 I'll have to admit that I was bought up in a black and white world. Anyone born before 1980 will probably not be able to understand this forth coming gripe. The country is becoming too girly for my liking, it's going down the toilet and I think and hope that Cammeron will change it. My job sends me all over the country and these last few days it sent me to Wales. I love Wales and the people who live there, they are mostly Polish or Lithuanian. Having stopped in the services on the M4 in Welsh Wales I concluded that I needed a dump. Well, I'll have to admit that I have never been so intrigued or fascinated in a WC in all my life. Having sat down to make my deposit to the Welsh economy, I was unexpectedly awakened with a cold jet of water in my crack and on my sack. Now, under other circumstances this would have been a paid for pleasure. Though on this occassion, it was all for free. It seemed that every move I made, would give me a delightful squirt of freezing cold water onto my never exposed or played with parts, well, rarely. So I jiggled and I squirmed in that bog for maybe an hour, just for the hell of it, before the Pakistani attendant decided that, even after my pleas of constipation, I should get out. Now, I have been in these idiot proof dump and go bogs before, but never had the sack and crack cold wash, well, not in England any way. So, is this a Welsh thing? Is this some kind of a conspiracy, to get the UK visitors to return. What do you, the salt of the earth, PW members think? If you think Cameron will change it, You were I'm sure sitting on the sink. Try using the cubicles where the more traditional pot resides. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vince Green Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 You are right about Wales being full of Polish though, I was amazed when I visited my mate in the summer. He said the village where he lives has been brought back to life by them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ack-ack Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 You are right about Wales being full of Polish though, I was amazed when I visited my mate in the summer. He said the village where he lives has been brought back to life by them. .....................(though the village pond hasn't a Carp in it or a Swan on it) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 .....................(though the village pond hasn't a Carp in it or a Swan on it) Is that because they are using the swan-down to wipe their bums? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
billytheghillie Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 My welsh mate died recently. He went just the way he would have wanted-- Peacefully in his Sheep! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gixer1 Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 (edited) Was there still paper or are you expected to use the jet wash until its all off? Could be unfunny if you had a prolapse that was very sensitive... Edited October 20, 2012 by gixer1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clayduster Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 Beware, was there an ATR button? Most people think it is the automatic toilet roll, but it is actually the automatic tampax remover. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pigeonblasterian Posted October 20, 2012 Report Share Posted October 20, 2012 Cold water does havoc to my sack.Makes me feel as though i have inwardly ingested a couple of plums. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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