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Handy tips?


henry d
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3 hours ago, Retsdon said:

Honestly, the solution is to buy one of these.  All you need is a T junction on the inlet pipe to the cistern and you're good to go.

I know some people will throw their hands up in horror, but in actual fact once you get used to the knack of using one - PM me if you want the key tips -  they're far more hygienic, and way more comfortable than using paper. I dont' know anyone who has made the switch who would ever go back. 

hello, yes have used those many times in parts of Thailand and China, in China the building with ???? small appartment did not even have toilets, oh and those spray gadgets were fitted to the cold tap🤬

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1 hour ago, Retsdon said:

Honestly, the solution is to buy one of these.  All you need is a T junction on the inlet pipe to the cistern and you're good to go.

I know some people will throw their hands up in horror, but in actual fact once you get used to the knack of using one - PM me if you want the key tips -  they're far more hygienic, and way more comfortable than using paper. I dont' know anyone who has made the switch who would ever go back. 

We were looking at installing a bidet and this looks like a possible solution if there is not enough room, thanks for sharing!

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2 hours ago, Retsdon said:

Honestly, the solution is to buy one of these.  All you need is a T junction on the inlet pipe to the cistern and you're good to go.

I know some people will throw their hands up in horror, but in actual fact once you get used to the knack of using one - PM me if you want the key tips -  they're far more hygienic, and way more comfortable than using paper. I dont' know anyone who has made the switch who would ever go back. 

Mine arrived yesterday. 👍🙂

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3 hours ago, loriusgarrulus said:

Mine arrived yesterday. 👍🙂

I don't know if you've used one before, but here's the drill.

When you install it  - put a variable tap between the main water pressure and the hose fitting. You don't want to give yourself an involuntary enema. Turn the tap down until you get a steady but not massive flow. Once youve got it right you just leave it alone.

And here's how you use the thing.

1) You're sitting on the pan and you finish doing your business.

2) take the hose out of its fitting with your right hand.

3) put your left hand down into the pan in front of your nether regions....and here comes the crucial part

4 wet your left hand thoroughly with a good long jet from the hose. If you have a 'wet' bathroom you can do this outside the pan.

5) At this point I turn the 'gun' around in my right hand and reach behind me to go in from the back and my left hand comes in from the front.

6) Direct the spray at your ring. And while you do that,  you help clean your ring with your left hand. if you say this to people they go 'Phew!'. but actually what happens is that when you wet your left hand you put a seal of water between your skin and anything your fingers come into contact with. And it absolutely works. When you finish, if you have a tentative sniff at your left hand ( I know - a bit too much information) you'll find that all you can smell is the chlorine in the water supply. Wash your hands afterwards, and voila. Skid marks a thing of the past.

The key though is to make sure that your left hand is wet before you start exploring. If you forget that part, you'll be scrubbing your hand for ages. But if your hand is wet, it's like wearing a glove.

Anyway, possibly too much info, but if I ever moved back to the UK, the absolute first thing I'd do would be to install a hose and gun. Once you've got used to it, using paper is anathema. Paper, horrible messy stuff that hurts. And it's near impossible to get a proper finished job with it. No, the hose is the way to go. Definitely.

 

Edited by Retsdon
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1 hour ago, Retsdon said:

I don't know if you've used one before, but here's the drill.

When you install it  - put a variable tap between the main water pressure and the hose fitting. You don't want to give yourself an involuntary enema. Turn the tap down until you get a steady but not massive flow. Once youve got it right you just leave it alone.

And here's how you use the thing.

1) You're sitting on the pan and you finish doing your business.

2) take the hose out of its fitting with your right hand.

3) put your left hand down into the pan in front of your nether regions....and here comes the crucial part

4 wet your left hand thoroughly with a good long jet from the hose. If you have a 'wet' bathroom you can do this outside the pan.

5) At this point I turn the 'gun' around in my right hand and reach behind me to go in from the back and my left hand comes in from the front.

6) Direct the spray at your ring. And while you do that,  you help clean your ring with your left hand. if you say this to people they go 'Phew!'. but actually what happens is that when you wet your left hand you put a seal of water between your skin and anything your fingers come into contact with. And it absolutely works. When you finish, if you have a tentative sniff at your left hand ( I know - a bit too much information) you'll find that all you can smell is the chlorine in the water supply. Wash your hands afterwards, and voila. Skid marks a thing of the past.

The key though is to make sure that your left hand is wet before you start exploring. If you forget that part, you'll be scrubbing your hand for ages. But if your hand is wet, it's like wearing a glove.

Anyway, possibly too much info, but if I ever moved back to the UK, the absolute first thing I'd do would be to install a hose and gun. Once you've got used to it, using paper is anathema. Paper, horrible messy stuff that hurts. And it's near impossible to get a proper finished job with it. No, the hose is the way to go. Definitely.

 

I have never had skid mark's in my knickers anyway. I think that is a man thing.  :)

I have a dedicated bum sponge, which I will use with the shataff. 👍

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10 minutes ago, Retsdon said:

I'm so sorry. I didn't realize. I'd have been more discreet if I'd known I was talking in mixed company. Pleas accept my apologies....

yvonne is a very intelligent a scientifical type lady , a little bit of poop talk wouldnt make her blush :good:.

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27 minutes ago, Retsdon said:

I'm really glad you can still laugh, and hope you're doing OK with your medical thing. We might have disagreed about politics but if it's what we hope it's not, I'm pulling for you. 

I’m fine thankyou; a few sniffles but nothing to write home about. 
Thanks for the sentiment, and I wish you and yours a safe journey through this also, as I do everyone on this forum and their extended families.  👍

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55 minutes ago, loriusgarrulus said:

Thankyou for the compliment.  Hope you and Lin are keeping well. OH and I are staying in as much as possible and coffin dodging at the moment. 👍

youre very welcome , and we wish you all the best with the coffin dodging . lin is keeping out of the way of things as much as possible , and im getting sprayed with snot encrusted toilet tissues from school bins about fifty times a day , while im at work :sick:.

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20 minutes ago, mel b3 said:

youre very welcome , and we wish you all the best with the coffin dodging . lin is keeping out of the way of things as much as possible , and im getting sprayed with snot encrusted toilet tissues from school bins about fifty times a day , while im at work .

Hope you have a good immune system. At least the school bins will be empty after this week for a while. 👍

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9 hours ago, Retsdon said:

Honestly, the solution is to buy one of these.  All you need is a T junction on the inlet pipe to the cistern and you're good to go.

I know some people will throw their hands up in horror, but in actual fact once you get used to the knack of using one - PM me if you want the key tips -  they're far more hygienic, and way more comfortable than using paper. I dont' know anyone who has made the switch who would ever go back. 

jeesus..........its all very well you premoting something like that in 100 deg climate..............there is no way im stuffing that up my jacksie in near freezing conditions............i will have a bloody heartattack

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4 minutes ago, ditchman said:

jeesus..........its all very well you premoting something like that in 100 deg climate..............there is no way im stuffing that up my jacksie in near freezing conditions............i will have a bloody heartattack

You can get them to fit on your mixer tap on the sink next to the toilet. That's what I have got.  Warm water. 👍

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18 minutes ago, loriusgarrulus said:

You can get them to fit on your mixer tap on the sink next to the toilet. That's what I have got.  Warm water. 👍

yvonne that aint goin to work....we havt sinks and stuff in the toilet and there is no way i can thro my rear in the long room sink............anyway with the water we have around here my nipsy would get clogged up with limescale

i can see the merits of using it in saudi...........suppose it beats using sand..or getting a goat to lick your rear...

i will stick to the old way.......when i run out of loo paper i will use spagnum moss from the lawn...

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15 minutes ago, ditchman said:

yvonne that aint goin to work....we havt sinks and stuff in the toilet and there is no way i can thro my rear in the long room sink............anyway with the water we have around here my nipsy would get clogged up with limescale

i can see the merits of using it in saudi...........suppose it beats using sand..or getting a goat to lick your rear...

i will stick to the old way.......when i run out of loo paper i will use spagnum moss from the lawn...

Watch out for snails. You don't want to get lung worm via your back passage. 😂

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9 minutes ago, loriusgarrulus said:

Watch out for snails. You don't want to get lung worm via your back passage. 😂

toooooo late Retson and Hernry D both agree that i talk out of my back passage already...its all that heavy breathin i do

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I've a mate who has lived in Thailand/Cambodia for years, he refers to the above device as "THE BUM GUN"

I visited him whilst he was in Bangkok and it was one of the first things he pointed out to me in my hotel room, encouraging me to give it a go.  However he never gave me such detailed instructions as you.  After my first and only attempt I needed a complete change of clothes and used up all my towels drying the bathroom floor!!!

I switched back over to using the paper, even though it was so flimsy you had to use 6 layers to avoid the dreaded POO FINGER.

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