Fatcatsplat

Listening to the way the guy was talking, he had every intention of shooting the two guys and was just covering his a**e (Oops American -a*s!!). As far as personal protection goes, i sleep with a very scary wife - Works a treat!!

Given the choice, would you lick it??? Yes i am joking.......Sorry

One on flea bay right now for a fiver

Large Jack Daniels and Clove Cordial - If it don't take the pain away, you don't care by the end of the bottle!!

Any idea how much the moulded ones are? None of the websites seem to mention cost!!

Toilet roll (quilted) and wine gums, but not necessarily in that order.

It's what girls do to keep the flies off their ice cream........******, wrong punchline!!!!

First gun was a lanber sporter (S/H). Added to the collection with a used lincoln trap gun, an ugartechea side by side and finally a new bettinsoli. The bettinsoli looks nice, but to be fair, I'm looking to out it 'cos i can't shoot the bloody thing straight, the action's horrible and it just doesn't feel right. I use the ugartechea and lincoln for a chuckle every now and then, but always go back to the lanber. The wood finish is horribly varnished and whatever cut the engraving in was blunt, but it shoots straight, is completely reliable and feels right when i bring it up. I'm not the best shot in the world by a long chalk, but my lanber certainly holds its own against guns 10 times the price.

Amazingly absorbent :blink:

Townie, but with a bit of straw stuck down me trousers!! Moved from East London to the lovely South Essex countryside, surrounded by fields, sky and....er...... oil refinerys - You wanna see the lovely browns and reds in Autumn when the rust slides down the gasometers!!

Well, i don't shop in Primark......but only 'cos nothing bloody fits me!!

I've got a really bad paper cut on my thumb - Does that count?

Farts with uncertainty

It's something to do with the Essex and virgins paradox

Of all the places.....The second coming had to happen in bleedin' Dartford!!!

Top chaps to a man!! Well shot and a good time had by all. Cheers, Matt

Done the champagne bit last night - Smells a bit like cat's wee this morning though - Will let you know how it turns out.

Got fat finger syndrome and can't hold a chord to save me life, so i bought a set of drums and stuck em in me cellar!! Bog standard cheap CB drum shells, but with remo pinstripe heads and a couple of Sabian and Paiste cymbals to make it sound a bit classier. Got a couple of mates down the road who come down with various semi acoustics and leccy guitars for drunken jams - Pogues, Foo Fighters, Eddy Cochran, Beatles, Stones - All the usual standards. Very occasionally, there are brief moments where we all seem to be playing the same song, at the same time and at the same speed. Lovely when a plan comes together!!

Mind if i tag along to help lower the Essex average?

Used to run marathons about 9 stone ago - 1500 is not an overly long distance, but what you will need is stamina to maintain a reasonable speed, with enough gas left for the last 200 metres. Would suggest you google "Fartlek" (It is a real word, a funny word, but a real word nonetheless) or interval training. Run along a road and use lamp posts (assuming you are not in Mersea) as guides - Sprint for two, go half pace for two and then jog slowly for two - You're trying to get your muscles going, but also building up your oxygen levels - The plan is to go as fast as possible for as long as possible, while still maintaining oxygen and not ending up running on empty. If you have any hills near you, run up and down them - That will get the blood pumping on the way up and will give you time to recover on the way down. Loads of water, loads of bananas and loads of training. Good luck!

....and i had a 2 litre bottle of white lightning!

Congratulations. The bit that was spooky for me was the first time i drove a car without an instructor in the passenger seat!!

Those rabbits look tired

Clumbers came recommended from a family friend, basically for their temperament, brains and ability to work (as well as passing the Aaaahhhh factor for the missus). With a bit of luck, i've managed to attach a picture!! Am working tonight Mrs S, but will give you a call tomorrow evening if i may. Thanks, Matt