utectok Posted May 7, 2011 Author Report Share Posted May 7, 2011 (edited) For the record I've never hit my kids or my dogs and we all get along fine. I guess I think once you start shouting at them then you go onto whacking then and it all gets rather out of hand. I try not to lose my temper and find a quiet word does the job. But then I have girls and i am probably considered a soft liberal w****r by most of the real men on here Edited May 7, 2011 by utectok Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
holly Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 i got smacked as a kid by father , and ,school but one things for sure i never got smacked for the same thing twice one smack i learnt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pimpkiller Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 i totaly support smacking, a child has no sense of reasoning or the vocabulary to do so, most people who were smacked themselves as a child agree with smacking i bet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imissalot Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 in a word yes a quick slap sorts it out , and yes thats were we have scum now because they stopped the cane at school kids know they can get away with nearly anything ,bring back cane, public flogging and national service Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
utectok Posted May 8, 2011 Author Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 in a word yes a quick slap sorts it out , and yes thats were we have scum now because they stopped the cane at school kids know they can get away with nearly anything ,bring back cane, public flogging and national service And public executions? Mmmmm share the love forgiveness and compassion !!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alanl50 Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 (edited) I think your getting smacking confused with abuse and there not the same, I was smacked not beaten by my father (not often), primary school headmaster and the local village bobby and I'm sure i deserved too it taught me respect, not to cross the line and to do as I as was told, me and my mates even got caught scrumping in the local village police stations house (young peas) garden by the Sergeant who lived there apart from the statuary kick up the harris, me and my mates had to attend the police station each weekend to sweep up and generally clean the police station yard and grounds as punishment and I never told my parents or neither did my mates, my father should we say would not have been happy. did it affect NO Smacking has to be the final result where reasoning has failed. I wonder if the a-hole of an 18 year old who burgled my mother in laws house making frightened to live in her own home while the father in law lay a provided hospital bed in the living room coupled up to equipment which kept him alive had have been smacked when he was little would have committed the crime!! OH dont tell he comes from a broken home poor little boy, lucky for me I found out who committed the crime from a local lad who been bragged too by the a-hole saying he'd seen the hospital bed in the living room. The sad thing is anyone can have kids and some of those people really should not, but you need a licence to get a shotgun-rifle, perhaps prospective parents should be vetted as to there suitability to be parents and to take responsibility for what there children do when it goes wrong and instead expecting the state to pay actually pay for there own children IE no benefits if you cant afford your children dont have them! Edited May 8, 2011 by Alanl50 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
utectok Posted May 8, 2011 Author Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 (edited) I should imagine my girls will be mugging old ladys anytime soon then (15 and 17yrs) Edited May 8, 2011 by utectok Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frenchieboy Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 My answer to the question "Should you smack you child" is quite simple - NO! This thread has opened up a hell of a lot of old and very painful wound and has brought back some terrible memories! I started reading this thread yesterday and have had a sleepless night worrying about if I should (or could) even post a reply to it! Even now while I type this there are tears in my eyes stemming from some of my childhood memories and what I had to endure, feelings that I would never want any other person, especially a child, to ever have to feel or remember! I have no children and have never wanted any, in fact if the truth be known I have always been terrified of the thought of having children of my own in case I turned into anything like the father that I had! I was brought up in the days when it was socially acceptable to "smack" your kids as a standard and perfectly acceptable way of disciplining children but some times "in the heat of the moment" a "quick smack" can get out of hand and go a lot further and turn into a savage beating, and this is where the real danger lies! - Believe me I know! I am trully ashamed to say that I could not and never did love my father and even though he died some 20 years ago I still hate and despise him for the beatings he gave me - Yes, not "smacks", I could have accpeted them, I am talking about full blown "beatings"! Before any of you think about a smack as a way of discipling any of your children PLEASE TAKE A STEP BACK AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO DO! If you really do decide that a smack is warranted make sure that you really do know where to draw the line between a "quick smack" and a "savage beating" and that you are able to control your self and stick to that (Very fine) line! - Please don't have your children growing up harbouring the same sort of feelings about their parents that I will have to carry to my grave about my father! No child deserves that! I was going to say more but some things are best left unsaid, and please do not even think about saying that I am just trying to play a sympathy card here, you really don't know enough about me or my life to justify such a thought! I don't want sympathy, all I want is to see children living their lives filled with happy memories and love and respect for their parents! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foxbuster Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 You deserved physical pain?? inflicted by a parent??? REALLY??? What could make an adult feel so threatened, that they could find the need to injure a kid? We see this every day on the news, and the kneejerk gang go off on one about "lets hang the ********", yet when we do it to our own, its called discipline. Im sorry, but your generation had it wrong! There was as much bad news back then, but there was not the media to report it. 'Father beats child to death' was he only trying to teach him right from wrong? There is more than one way to skin a cat (in a non violent way mind). Many a wise man has quoted that violence breeds violence. There must be some truth in that. Man, you talk some ****! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GW80 Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 I personally don't have any kids of my own, but have a few neices and a nephew. I have near enough brought up my nephew as my own and have given him a slap now and then when he needed it, I have to admit if i ever have any kids i would like them to end up up like him! Nothing wrong with chastiment but like dog training it must be timed correct!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
utectok Posted May 8, 2011 Author Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 Terrible story frencieboy and I like you think if you escalate violence in the home it's not easy to draw the line. I wee spank is best kept for the wife in the bedroom IMHO Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FalconFN Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 i totaly support smacking, a child has no sense of reasoning or the vocabulary to do so, most people who were smacked themselves as a child agree with smacking i bet. No, but as am adult you should. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kdubya Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 My answer to the question "Should you smack you child" is quite simple - NO! This thread has opened up a hell of a lot of old and very painful wound and has brought back some terrible memories! I started reading this thread yesterday and have had a sleepless night worrying about if I should (or could) even post a reply to it! Even now while I type this there are tears in my eyes stemming from some of my childhood memories and what I had to endure, feelings that I would never want any other person, especially a child, to ever have to feel or remember! I have no children and have never wanted any, in fact if the truth be known I have always been terrified of the thought of having children of my own in case I turned into anything like the father that I had! I was brought up in the days when it was socially acceptable to "smack" your kids as a standard and perfectly acceptable way of disciplining children but some times "in the heat of the moment" a "quick smack" can get out of hand and go a lot further and turn into a savage beating, and this is where the real danger lies! - Believe me I know! I am trully ashamed to say that I could not and never did love my father and even though he died some 20 years ago I still hate and despise him for the beatings he gave me - Yes, not "smacks", I could have accpeted them, I am talking about full blown "beatings"! Before any of you think about a smack as a way of discipling any of your children PLEASE TAKE A STEP BACK AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT TO DO! If you really do decide that a smack is warranted make sure that you really do know where to draw the line between a "quick smack" and a "savage beating" and that you are able to control your self and stick to that (Very fine) line! - Please don't have your children growing up harbouring the same sort of feelings about their parents that I will have to carry to my grave about my father! No child deserves that! I was going to say more but some things are best left unsaid, and please do not even think about saying that I am just trying to play a sympathy card here, you really don't know enough about me or my life to justify such a thought! I don't want sympathy, all I want is to see children living their lives filled with happy memories and love and respect for their parents! like I have said before some people can't differentiate a controlling smack from a vicious beating, I would suggest that anyone having this problem is in need of phsycoligical help,the old saying spare the rod and spoil the child rings true, having brought up 7 kids I feel suitably qualified in saying that, oh and just thought Id mention it but the intolerant kid bashing bully (me) will be at one of the grandkids birthday party later today, the bully will be enjoying himself with his kids and grandkids, and the bully will be presenting a nice new shiny bike to the birthday boy, now I dont suppose I will hear the words "hide the bully is here to give us vicious slap" no it will be can I have a kiss grandad/ dad oh and frenchie boy sorry to say this but I now think Im not sure how to take you anymore, you state you "hate and despise" your father for what he did to you, and that you're in tears thinking about it, yet last november you were standing up for him and saying "how proud I am of him and his achievements? KW Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artschool Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 Surely there is the world of difference between a smack the bottom and dishing out a beating? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
foxbuster Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 Surely there is the world of difference between a smack the bottom and dishing out a beating? Of course there is mate, but a lot on here are living in the nambi pambi state in thinking a smack is wrong!! And people wonder why kids are like what they are today-i wonder Anyway i do think its the parents decision on how they bring up they're kids, and if anyone told me how to bring up my kids they'd have a 'smack' too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gnome of the Woods Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 I have smacked mine in the past but they are past that point now. As a last resort and only on a handful of occasions. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ack-ack Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 (edited) If i had kids would I hit them? I'd like to think not. It works for some people and its their choice how they raise their kids. Good luck to them but its not for me. Edited May 8, 2011 by ack-ack Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boromir Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 Yes I agree with smacking. My mum used to smack me if I did wrong and have accepted that was right. I remember stealing chocolate bars from a shop and kept on doing it until I got caught and my mum gave me a good smack. Never stole again in my life. MM you say it encourages violence, so why is it today kids more than ever committing crime? Just the other week a 12 year old boy raped another girl the same age. Or yesterday I saw a group of kids kicking a ball at a war memorial and you can't say anything cause you the one who gets in trouble. Kids today have no respect and its going to get worse as time goes on with too many do gooders in charge. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kyska Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 (edited) Of course there is mate, but a lot on here are living in the nambi pambi state in thinking a smack is wrong!! And people wonder why kids are like what they are today-i wonder Anyway i do think its the parents decision on how they bring up they're kids, and if anyone told me how to bring up my kids they'd have a 'smack' too! Its not nambi pamby as you say, its our choice as parents what we believe in. Things move on dude, slapping kids just has no place in our society, but I agree with you, it is up to you, I just don't sanction it.. My belief, is that hitting another person is assualt, why do kids not get the same protection of the law as any other person? Thats a direct question, why do you think its ok to assualt a young person, but not ok to assualt an adult, elderly person? (although you have stated that if anyone told you how to bring up your kids, you'd fill them in too) How would you feel if someone slapped one of your children? Surely the right to hit children extends to all adults as we all know we don't 'own' our kids, we nuture them. Hitting children just shows that that parent has lost control of the situation, acting much like a child I would say...doesn't give the right message IMO. I've nevr hit my daughter, and nor would I want to, why would I want to scare, cause pain and confuse the very item I would give my life for? I've always used the tactic of telling how dissapointed I am with her if she does wrong, its takes very little time for her apologise and feel guilty. I find it incredulous that because kids haven't been slapped about a bit, its caused all of the wrongs in our society! Its a far, far more complicated social issue than the lack of a slap around the ears! Edited May 8, 2011 by kyska Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frenchieboy Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 KW - Yes, you are quite right, last November I was standing up for his "achievements as a soldier" just as I was standing up for the French in general. As I recall the thread in question was was what might have be classed as an attack in general on the French. My father was a very patriotic frenchman and fought with the Free French Army during the war and received many commendations including one which was given personally by De Gaulle, that is something I can respect. While I am allowed to honour or respect those that fought for our freedom, our rights and the life that we have today it does not stop me from harbouring resentment, hatred or other feelings that I have for things that happened in life! I have never tried nor wanted to "opened up" about parts of my childhood or to discuss any of the things that happened behind my family's closed doors to anyone except my wife before! If that makes me wrong or a "bad person" then so be it! I am now wishing that I hadn't tried to advise others about the "potential" dangers of "smacking their children"! Maybe it is better that some things are left unsaid! Maybe I am misguided or wrong in thinking that I ought to be able to love and respect my parents! I posted my reply to the original question posed on this thread "Would you smack your children" purely in the hope that it might save a few children from having to carry similar sad or painful memories or resentment throughout their lives. If you wish to follow this post up with me or question my honesty could I respectfully ask you to please be kind enough to do so via PM rather that on open forum? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kdubya Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 KW - Yes, you are quite right, last November I was standing up for his "achievements as a soldier" just as I was standing up for the French in general. As I recall the thread in question was was what might have be classed as an attack in general on the French. My father was a very patriotic frenchman and fought with the Free French Army during the war and received many commendations including one which was given personally by De Gaulle, that is something I can respect. While I am allowed to honour or respect those that fought for our freedom, our rights and the life that we have today it does not stop me from harbouring resentment, hatred or other feelings that I have for things that happened in life! I have never tried nor wanted to "opened up" about parts of my childhood or to discuss any of the things that happened behind my family's closed doors to anyone except my wife before! If that makes me wrong or a "bad person" then so be it! I am now wishing that I hadn't tried to advise others about the "potential" dangers of "smacking their children"! Maybe it is better that some things are left unsaid! Maybe I am misguided or wrong in thinking that I ought to be able to love and respect my parents! I posted my reply to the original question posed on this thread "Would you smack your children" purely in the hope that it might save a few children from having to carry similar sad or painful memories or resentment throughout their lives. If you wish to follow this post up with me or question my honesty could I respectfully ask you to please be kind enough to do so via PM rather that on open forum? first off I was not questioning your honesty, simply stating you confused me ( a rare occurance I might add I can usually suss someone out in short time) as for opening up your life, you do that not I, I will leave that there. as for those who blindly believe that discipling a wayward child is assault, I would suggest that they read this, it sort of puts it in a nutshell. KW http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/245359/the_worst_child_abuse_lack_of_discipline.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
utectok Posted May 8, 2011 Author Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 Its not nambi pamby as you say, its our choice as parents what we believe in. Things move on dude, slapping kids just has no place in our society, but I agree with you, it is up to you, I just don't sanction it.. My belief, is that hitting another person is assualt, why do kids not get the same protection of the law as any other person? Thats a direct question, why do you think its ok to assualt a young person, but not ok to assualt an adult, elderly person? (although you have stated that if anyone told you how to bring up your kids, you'd fill them in too) How would you feel if someone slapped one of your children? Surely the right to hit children extends to all adults as we all know we don't 'own' our kids, we nuture them. Hitting children just shows that that parent has lost control of the situation, acting much like a child I would say...doesn't give the right message IMO. I've nevr hit my daughter, and nor would I want to, why would I want to scare, cause pain and confuse the very item I would give my life for? I've always used the tactic of telling how dissapointed I am with her if she does wrong, its takes very little time for her apologise and feel guilty. I find it incredulous that because kids haven't been slapped about a bit, its caused all of the wrongs in our society! Its a far, far more complicated social issue than the lack of a slap around the ears! well said that man!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frenchieboy Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 first off I was not questioning your honesty, simply stating you confused me ( a rare occurance I might add I can usually suss someone out in short time) as for opening up your life, you do that not I, I will leave that there. as for those who blindly believe that discipling a wayward child is assault, I would suggest that they read this, it sort of puts it in a nutshell. KW http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/245359/the_worst_child_abuse_lack_of_discipline.html Thank you for your Reply KW. I have sent you a PM! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beretta28g Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 I dont know, but when i was at school, i was badly beten up by another pupil who had beten up many others too. He was onlu suspended which suited him perfectly as he didnt have to do any school work. I cant help thinking whether a slight tap insted would have done more good? Some thing for thought? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Imperfection Posted May 8, 2011 Report Share Posted May 8, 2011 i got smacked as a kid by father , and ,school but one things for sure i never got smacked for the same thing twice one smack i learnt Snap. At junior school in the 70's i was given ten of the best (cane) and when he got to five it got worse because i refused to cry even though i was in agony so he hit me even harder.Was this abuse? Yes because this isnt being repremanded,but someone simply taking out their frustrations on a child.However i didnt do what i'd done wrong again. My mother used to cane me also and to be honest i began to despise her from quite an early age.Only stopped when i got big enough to defend myself and she knew i could inflict pain on her. Children need discipline,but not abuse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.