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Anybody send their kids to private school


fuzzypigeon
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Just wanting to hear from anyone who has or does have their children in private school as I've been looking at sending mine to private school and wondered what the thoughts of anyone who has or is doing it already.

 

Cheers

 

Paul

 

We do. We make a lot of sacrifices to do so.

 

Pros

 

Quality of education

Small classes

Facilities

Sports Ethos

Children have respect for teachers and adults

Builds well rounded and very confident children

 

Cons

Cost

Your children mix with children whose parents are significantly richer you. There is a danger that it rubs off on them.

Some of your so called friends resent you

Pressured environment (also a plus)

 

Feel free to PM if you have specific more private questions

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I agree with AVB, we moved ours from one to another to get away from loathsome parents. Go for academic reputation not the cache of the fancy name in other words as the latter attracts the parents who spend the money mainly for the daily car park parade snottiness.

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My parents put me and my brother and sister through public school - they made a hell of a lot of sacrifices to do so and still live in the small 3 bed house that they first bought in the 70s. Fortunately there were still assisted places at the time before labour stopped them. I don't think I would be where I am now having been to university and got myself a good job...the local comprehensives were pretty poor and no grammar schools were available. I would like to put my future kids through public school as well if I can afford to.

 

There are some normal down to earth kids go and of course there are many who have no idea of the value of money because daddy can buy them anything.

 

If you. Can afford it then it is worth doing and I hope I am fortunate enough in the future to be able to try to repay my parents some how.

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I went to one for two and a half years.

 

The education is better, but some of the people and teachers can cause problems from what i found. Also, if you play for any of the sports teams you'll probably never get in trouble for anything :lol:

 

You can get a damn good education at private schools. I did find that if certain teachers took a disliking to you, then you were doomed to be leaving the school on slightly "unfriendly" terms, but thats a whole different story.

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Its all about knowing what will suit your child. I have two girls, chalk and cheese. The eldest was driven study wise from the word go, the other practical like me. The eldest won a place at a girls high school (we could not afford the fee's) and has done herself proud, graduating uni and in a job she likes at Boots HQ. The doer also went through training at Radbrook to study hair dressing and is out earning her clever big siss!

You realy have to take a long hard look at your kids, will they be happy? the work load at private or grammar schools will crumple a lot of average kids, "THEY" have to want to do it, if not you will be resented for life.

 

atvb Paul.

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I was, my brother took commmon entrance but ploughed it twice so went to the local state school. Career wise and earnings we are about the same. I was good at sport but no interest in academic stuff.

 

At reunions i find i am doing as well if not better than most of the other. I'm happy in what i do and no degree could really prepare you ( maybe a bit of business studies).

 

Like many of you on here, my parents sacrificed a lot and it's my only regret in life that i didn't take more of an advantage of what was on offer.

 

The school looked at each pupil as a whole thank god so i had a great time there. took 9 O levels, got six in my mocks so did no revision for the real ones and as a result got.....1, geography grade C. It's been useful at times but all joking apart, a good eductaion is never wasted.

 

My daughter is at the village primary school. It's a great school and she knows everyone. When the time comes we will go private but it will be a school that is right for her. Some friends children go to my old school and it has changed dramatically ( call it new money if you want) and they have no concept of the real world. Some of the stuff i hear woudl not have been tolerated in my day and makes yoiur skin crawl.

 

Hamster, you summed it perfectly

Edited by keg
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Its all about knowing what will suit your child. I have two girls, chalk and cheese. The eldest was driven study wise from the word go, the other practical like me. The eldest won a place at a girls high school (we could not afford the fee's) and has done herself proud, graduating uni and in a job she likes at Boots HQ. The doer also went through training at Radbrook to study hair dressing and is out earning her clever big siss!

You realy have to take a long hard look at your kids, will they be happy? the work load at private or grammar schools will crumple a lot of average kids, "THEY" have to want to do it, if not you will be resented for life.

 

atvb Paul.

The best advice I have read well put SS :good:

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I went to both private & state schools. Met nice people at both.

 

The girls, bunking off, playing cards and smoking was better class at the local comp though :good::lol:

 

At state schools the kids are streamed so you are generally lumped in with your intellectual peers anyway.

 

Money isn't everything, but if it is an indication of success, then I know more successful self made people that went to school in the state system than in the private system.

Edited by ME
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One of my mates who has just moved into his 1.4 m house was fretting that his daughter (who is at the school I went to) was the only child in her class that didn't have her own pool.

 

The school used to be where local businessmen and professionals made sacrifices and sent their kids. Now it is full of geezers, gangsters and wannabes and at £14k out of net income per child per year...

 

Hamster has nailed it in what he says.

 

I've got 3 kids and we vowed we wouldn't do for 1 what we couldn't do for all 3.

 

Long story short, massive push on the 11+. The eldest takes it at the end of this year and he's bright enough alright but it all about what happens on the day and that's rolling the dice still.

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One of my mates who has just moved into his 1.4 m house was fretting that his daughter (who is at the school I went to) was the only child in her class that didn't have her own pool.

 

The school used to be where local businessmen and professionals made sacrifices and sent their kids. Now it is full of geezers, gangsters and wannabes and at £14k out of net income per child per year...

 

Hamster has nailed it in what he says.

 

I've got 3 kids and we vowed we wouldn't do for 1 what we couldn't do for all 3.

 

Long story short, massive push on the 11+. The eldest takes it at the end of this year and he's bright enough alright but it all about what happens on the day and that's rolling the dice still.

 

The swimming pool quote is exactly what I have heard from other children. The day one of mine says is they will get a clip around the ear.

 

I mentioned in a previous post though about the 'goody bags' given away at birthday parties - £60 boxes of lego for example. My daughter (6) attended one of her classmates birthday parties recently and the 'goody bag' was a £70 pair of converse trainers! Work that one out. This child is one of the grandchildren of the founder of a national high street chain of shops so they are not short of a few quid (although they are probably doomed to go broke after that statement).

 

Not sure I agree that the schools are full of geezers, gangsters and wannabes although mine is just over the border in Herts so we do get a better class of parent compared to Essex. :hmm: It's a bit like shooting though. People assume that is it a 'toffs' sport whereas as we know it is very varied. Likewise the population at private schools. I don't know the exact breakdown of the parents amongst my childrens classes but I suspect it is along the lines of

 

Business owners - 30%

City money - 20%

Family money - 20%

Professionals - Lawyers, doctors etc - 10%

Hard working grafters (builders etc.) - 10%

Dodgy characters - 10%

Fortunately Estate Agents and used car dealers are banned.

 

 

One word of advice for anybody considering putting their kids through is when to do it. We decided, and could afford, to do it from the age of 4. This gets them used to the environment and gradually introduces them to the pressures. I have seen kids come in at the age of 11 or 13 who have managed to pass the entrance exam (many don't) who just can't cope with the significant increase in pressure compared to the state school they came from. They go from being the top of their class to the bottom, long hours - 08:30-5:30, Saturdays, lots of prep etc. Quite a few fold.

 

Grammar schools are a good option of your are in a county that still has them (most don't) and your kids pass.

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I found that the more elite the school the better chance the kids have in life as the old boys networks still exist.

 

There is some truth to this. It's not that there's an old boys network because that suggests you could be a lazy idiot and still get a well paid gig simply because you know someone. Most people who are successful or who have money don't tend to spend it on engaging people who don't offer any value.

 

However, when you look at the contents of most private schools the common thread is that the children of the wealthy and successful go to school with the children of the wealthy and successful and that's where the common interest, connections and glue comes from.

 

Grammar school works the same way in that the common thread is academic intelligence and a desire to get on (well certaintly the desire on the part of the parents to see their children get on with the best that they can do).

 

As ME says, a good education doesn't guarantee anything in life, but it's the best start for your kids and they get something which will only help them - it's not something they can loose, spunk, gamble away, have stolen, mortgage etc. It's theirs for life and what they choose to do with it when older is entirely upto them.

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Not quite what the op asked but have you looked into moving house to an area where there is a good state school? I know it's still using your £ to gain a better education in a different way but possibly worth looking into.

 

My wife went to a posh girls school and hated it because she was the poorest girl in the class (no swimming pool etc) whereas I went to a towny comp after attending a nice village primary school and also hated it due to the inverted snobbery and the 'cool to be a failure' culture.

 

We decided to move from Bristol to the Cotswolds in 2010 and as I'm self employed location wasn't too much of an issue. We heard last week that our son has got into the local CofE school and we couldn't be more pleased. There is an excellent secondary school locally too.

 

I agree though that being happy is the important thing, if he is he'll find his way in life, whatever it is.

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Considered it for mine for a while - going as day pupils, but the best (and cheapest) alternative was to go the school near me (Snaith) that has an excellent reputation. That would've meant them moving to live with me.

 

In the end they had made such strong bonds at primary school they didn't want to break those ties with their classmates and now attend the local comp near to the ex-wife :angry: .

 

They briefly both went off the rails, but both are now firmly fixed on what they want to do when they leave so I'm sure it'll all work out.

 

I guess what I'm trying to say is if the kids want to go and it'll suit them, then go for it. If not, and you really don't like the local comp, then consider moving to an area in the catchment area of a better school.

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A big part of me wishes I'd not been sent to public school. I think the day-to-day troubles of a state school makes you mentally tougher and grow up with a bit more common sense/street cred.

 

Also, I resent the fact I had to endure years of going to an all-boys school. Please don't let your kid be constantly surrounded by boys, it's like a massive obstacle in the life of a public schoolboy.

Edited by Billy.
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A big part of me wishes I'd not been sent to public school. I think the day-to-day troubles of a state school makes you mentally tougher and grow up with a bit more common sense/street cred.

 

Also, I resent the fact I had to endure years of going to an all-boys school. Please don't let your kid be constantly surrounded by boys, it's like a massive obstacle in the life of a public schoolboy.

 

Gay-melt-down-tastic :lol::good:

 

Come on Billy it couldn't have been all that bad unless it was one of those "Catholic" all boys schools in Ireland.

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One of my close friends went to private school, he was more practical than academic and he just didnt put the work in and to be honest it was a waste of money. Like many others his parents sacrificed a lot for him to go. He is now in Uni but only by the skin of his teeth.r I think it all comes down to how the child responds to education and if takes all the opportunities open to them.

 

I have always said I would not send my children to a private school even if i could afford it, because if they want to do well in school they will do it wherever. The only time i would is if the local state school was very bad. Also some of my friends private school friends were just on a completely different planet ,from his group more of them seemed to have no concept of money or work ethic than those that did. This may not be the case in general maybe just his group but some of the rubbish they used to come out with was unbelievable :lol:

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Gay-melt-down-tastic :lol::good:

 

Come on Billy it couldn't have been all that bad unless it was one of those "Catholic" all boys schools in Ireland.

 

HZiBY.gif

 

Well, how to put this into perspective, I went to a prep school in Harpenden. The maths teacher was banned from the boys changing room due to a criminal offence and after the headmaster left, the new one decided to do a full check on all the staff and it turned out the chef who'd always be chatting to students was on the sex offenders register.

Edited by Billy.
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We paid for nursery and then private primary education.

 

After that, the College attached to the primary is free (for those who manage to get through their rigorous entrance exam), which is where he is now.

 

In my opinion, he's getting a better education than he'd get at most of the ****holes round here. <_<

 

The mistake that some of the Hooray Henrys make is to think that paying for an education is a replacement for responsible parenting.

 

There's no point in throwing money at education, if the kid is as thick as a board, but if you have an intelligent kid, it's a good move. In my opinion, they would be hopelessly held back in a comprehensive, where all kids have to slow down to the level of the no-hopers. This type of education is just a massive failure of the socialist **** system. :P

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There's no point in throwing money at education, if the kid is as thick as a board, but if you have an intelligent kid, it's a good move.

 

There's a simple way to determine that. If your child gets a scholarship, you pay less and know your child is going to make the most of what's been given to them.

 

Do I think private education benefited me, no. Would I tell my parents that, no. :rolleyes:

Edited by Billy.
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