Babysitting the grandkids

[kyska]

I'm looking after them in their own home, 24 miles from me hence 48mile round trip,

So far it's been all good and a few proper funny moments.

 

I've told my sons partner that whilst I'm loving doing it this week, and for nothing more than diesel money to help them out whilst they make more suitable long term arrangements, but it is a full time job for someone and more responsibility than I can take on.

 

I've reiterated my willingness to help out on an add hoc basis or even just a couple of days a week.

 

Her HMP salary I believe is circa £26k,

But they both seem to be ill prepared for the cost of childcare, (or resentful of paying for it )

Can she not look at the 30 hour free care?

[Mice!]

Only applies once there 3years old.

[TaxiDriver]

Well,

I've been doing my bit and going over and looking after them a couple of days a week (3 days this week) and on the whole thoroughly enjoyed it

Can't do it now

Out of the blue I had a call from a chap who's wayward daughter is a mate of my son, luckily he likes my son as he's well mannered, polite and a good influence on his daughter)

He runs an independent local builders/plumbers merchant and was looking for a van driver for 2-3 weeks initially, I've done my induction on all the health n safety stuff, and I start Monday.

[Me matt]

Well,

I've been doing my bit and going over and looking after them a couple of days a week (3 days this week) and on the whole thoroughly enjoyed it

Can't do it now

Out of the blue I had a call from a chap who's wayward daughter is a mate of my son, luckily he likes my son as he's well mannered, polite and a good influence on his daughter)

He runs an independent local builders/plumbers merchant and was looking for a van driver for 2-3 weeks initially, I've done my induction on all the health n safety stuff, and I start Monday.

Ah congrats mate - you'll enjoy that amd the bants lol

[Mice!]

That's a result, you helped out but now you need to work, hope you job works out.

[stumfelter]

I'm glad to see the idea of helping family is alive and well on pigeon watch!

[geordieh]

I'm looking after them in their own home, 24 miles from me hence 48mile round trip,

So far it's been all good and a few proper funny moments.

 

I've told my sons partner that whilst I'm loving doing it this week, and for nothing more than diesel money to help them out whilst they make more suitable long term arrangements, but it is a full time job for someone and more responsibility than I can take on.

 

I've reiterated my willingness to help out on an add hoc basis or even just a couple of days a week.

 

Her HMP salary I believe is circa £26k,

But they both seem to be ill prepared for the cost of childcare, (or resentful of paying for it )

I'm looking after them in their own home, 24 miles from me hence 48mile round trip,

So far it's been all good and a few proper funny moments.

I've told my sons partner that whilst I'm loving doing it this week, and for nothing more than diesel money to help them out whilst they make more suitable long term arrangements, but it is a full time job for someone and more responsibility than I can take on.

I've reiterated my willingness to help out on an add hoc basis or even just a couple of days a week.

Her HMP salary I believe is circa £26k,

But they both seem to be ill prepared for the cost of childcare, (or resentful of paying for it )

Depends on what job she is doing doesn't sound like she is doing a Prison Officers job or she would be working shifts if she is doing an admin job money would be a lot less

Edited September 8, 2017 by geordieh

[TaxiDriver]

Depends on what job she is doing doesn't sound like she is doing a Prison Officers job or she would be working shifts if she is doing an admin job money would be a lot less

I'm not sure why you would suggest she's not doing a PO's job ??

She's currently at least 3 maybe 4 weeks into her training as a Prison Officer (I've seen her in uniform) Not an admin clerk

[shaun4860]

I'm glad to see the idea of helping family is alive and well on pigeon watch!

People do help family out but more and more it becomes expected that the parents/grandparents will do it......

 

My mother said from the start that if my 2 sisters had kids then she wouldn't be doing childcare duties and she stuck to her guns and IMO that was right.

 

Kids of any age are hard work and why should the older generation have to give up the time they worked all of their lives for to have off, then have to give that up to start looking after children again,

 

See it all the time up here, kids get dropped of at granny/grandads on a Friday night to picked up on a Sunday afternoon.

 

If people want to do it then fair enough but it shouldn't be expected....

 

My tuppence worth anyway

 

[Lloyd90]

I'm glad to see the idea of helping family is alive and well on pigeon watch!

7am - 5pm - 5x a week totally free? Are you mad? That's more than helping people out numpty

[stumfelter]

7am - 5pm - 5x a week totally free? Are you mad? That's more than helping people out numpty

Duh, I wasn't referring to the op, he's done his bit. Do try to keep up at the back....

[Penelope]

Great news!

 

Sorry the other thing didn't work out.

 

Well,
I've been doing my bit and going over and looking after them a couple of days a week (3 days this week) and on the whole thoroughly enjoyed it
Can't do it now
Out of the blue I had a call from a chap who's wayward daughter is a mate of my son, luckily he likes my son as he's well mannered, polite and a good influence on his daughter)
He runs an independent local builders/plumbers merchant and was looking for a van driver for 2-3 weeks initially, I've done my induction on all the health n safety stuff, and I start Monday.

[parapilot]

I would do a couple of days to get a bond with your grandkids but not the full week that's to much.

 

As a couple on here have already said, when we had our second kid, we decided there was no point the mrs going back to work, what she would earn, and the cost of childcare we would not be to much worse off, we can live happy on my wage, and she gets quality time with kids.

 

Grand parents are great and would help, but I wouldn't want to put it on them.

 

I wouldn't charge to look after them, but I would ask them to cover petrol due to the distance involved.

[chris1961]

It's just the thing end of the wedge starts of a couple of days then three then four before you know it its full time funny how kids take the ****

[daveboy]

I have my Grandson regular for a couple of hours at a time.

If they wanted me to have him full time I would fake a heart attack

[TaxiDriver]

I would do a couple of days to get a bond with your grandkids but not the full week that's to much.

that's a fairly close explanation as to why I did it, and to help them out in short term

 

I wouldn't charge to look after them, but I would ask them to cover petrol due to the distance involved.

Being paid didn't sit comfortably with me, but as I'm long term unemployed with no income (not even JSA) I embarrassingly had to ask them to pay towards diesel. Edited September 11, 2017 by TaxiDriver

[dead eye alan]

Thy need a live in nanny. you need to get a job to get your life back on track.

[TaxiDriver]

Thy need a live in nanny. you need to get a job to get your life back on track.

Your right to a degree, They need to sort out a proper longer term arrangement.

I was helping out happily in the short term whilst job hunting.

 

Have had to have a break as I have 2 weeks work at a local builders merchants, I'll earn a bit of £ and hopefully at least get a good reference out of it, Maybe employment in the future.

[Newbie to this]

My sister and brother in law (both in the army) have a live in Au pair, it doesn't cost that much as most of the payment is room and board.

 

Might be a solution.

[Pumpkin]

I did a day a week with my granddaughter.

 

Absolutely loved it!!!

 

But no chance I would do it full time. Been there done that!

[Wb123]

Sounds like a tricky spot.

 

If possible I'd say you are happy to help with costs reimbursed but need to be free to stop at 48h notice for job interviews/work as appropriate. Also make it clear this is a temporary measure whilst trying to get back into full time work. Naturally this is to all intents and purposes not compatible with both parents returning to full time work unless they have a highly flexible plan C (assuming you were plan B after paid childcare).

 

In essence the above is not a viable way for both parents to go back to work, and in all probability it won't be making immediate financial sense for both parents to be working beyond avoiding a large CV gap and maintaining pension contributions.

 

Nannys and aupairs can be a good solution where sufficient earning potential is present for both partners but can come with substantial liabilities if for instance the nanny gets pregnant. Agencies avoid much of this but significantly increase the cost by pricing in the risk and adding their own overheads to the bill.

 

My colleagues with children who don't have unlimited instant free childcare tell me you have to be mercilessly strict on working out what work to take or not take, to know exactly how much you have to be making a day for work to cover costs, and have a clear idea why you are at work. Most of my female colleagues with children are working to maintain their skills and career progression but not ultimately net contributors to the family finances.

 

An uncle ended up as a stay at home dad due to childcare costs and seemed to enjoy it eventually.