team tractor Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 I just feel the need to vent myself sorry. I take my boy every year to pay our respects as I believe it's only right. This year my boy has joined beavers. It was his first parade this morning and I'm left feeling destroyed inside. His step dad has taken him there and no one knew who I was :( they all think his step dad is dad . Talk about hurt. The ex's partner said he wouldn't of missed his first parade for nothing and has made out like I've never taken him and it feels like he's stolen my pride . The ex walked out 6 1/2 years ago for another bloke ( lasted 2 weeks) and she finally settled with my rfd lol . He was 18 months old and my daughter was 4. I get them both 12 days a month but I feel like I'm missing out on their lives so much . Cheer me up some please Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
winnie&bezza Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 Sorry to hear mate and I think that's something that frightens the life out of most dads. So you went along aswell and he took him? As long as your kids acknowledge you as dad and I'm sure they do then all you have to do is carry on doing the most for them you can do. Not a lot of dads build wooden carts for their kids like you have and your knowledge in that field enables you to do a lot of fun stuff with them. Your hobbies like shooting,fishing and motor biking etc can bring you brilliant times with them especially your son. Chin up and carry on being DAD. You can offer more to them than many. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reggiegun Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 You need a night out with Sparkie, Alix and I. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adge Cutler Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 You have it easy mate..its hard being a full time dad...believe me... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reggiegun Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 You have it easy mate..its hard being a full time dad...believe me... I don't think that's what he wants to hear, plus he is a full time dad! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adge Cutler Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 Crass comment ! Here we go... Wind you neck in mate.... my post was very much tongue in cheek...why the invidious acrimony all the time or are just trying to be deliberately confrontational. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
longspoon Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 Here we go... Wind you neck in mate.... my post was very much tongue in cheek...why the invidious acrimony all the time or are just trying to be deliberately confrontational. You, in my opinion my friend, come across as an opinionated, arrogant rather unpleasant person. I've followed some of your posts and your holier than thou attitude is quite sickening. Confrontational ? no, just naturally repulsed by your attitude, are you totally insulated from reality by stupidity....oh, and I'm not your mate ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wilksy II Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 Here we go... Wind you neck in mate.... my post was very much tongue in cheek...why the invidious acrimony all the time or are just trying to be deliberately confrontational. I read it as crass! Your the one that needs to wind your neck in, you seem live on here causing confrontation, go listen to some bats! All this does is take the thread of course. I have two daughters and I couldn't imagine what it's like to go through what the op has , all the best mate there will plenty of great days ahead of you and your kids! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adge Cutler Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 You, in my opinion my friend, come across as an opinionated, arrogant rather unpleasant person. I've followed some of your posts and your holier than thou attitude is quite sickening. Confrontational ? no, just naturally repulsed by your attitude, are you totally insulated from reality by stupidity....oh, and I'm not your mate ! Ooh vicious. a stalker as well. I'm well aware many are deliberately trolling and trying to be confrontational when I post thank you. OK I will re structure my post. Look on the Brightside TT... it could be a lot worse... Being a full time father is not easy either I can tell you. Happy now Longspoon. ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
39TDS Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 I just feel the need to vent myself sorry. I take my boy every year to pay our respects as I believe it's only right. This year my boy has joined beavers. It was his first parade this morning and I'm left feeling destroyed inside. His step dad has taken him there and no one knew who I was :( they all think his step dad is dad . Talk about hurt. The ex's partner said he wouldn't of missed his first parade for nothing and has made out like I've never taken him and it feels like he's stolen my pride . The ex walked out 6 1/2 years ago for another bloke ( lasted 2 weeks) and she finally settled with my rfd lol . He was 18 months old and my daughter was 4. I get them both 12 days a month but I feel like I'm missing out on their lives so much . Cheer me up some please Just keep doing everything you can to be a good dad and it will all work out in the end. Yes there will be hurt on the way but as a dad it's your job to make sure that hurt is yours and not his. Keep at it mate, I've been there and done that and know how you feel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sou'Wester Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 I just feel the need to vent myself sorry. I take my boy every year to pay our respects as I believe it's only right. This year my boy has joined beavers. It was his first parade this morning and I'm left feeling destroyed inside. His step dad has taken him there and no one knew who I was :( they all think his step dad is dad . Talk about hurt. The ex's partner said he wouldn't of missed his first parade for nothing and has made out like I've never taken him and it feels like he's stolen my pride . The ex walked out 6 1/2 years ago for another bloke ( lasted 2 weeks) and she finally settled with my rfd lol . He was 18 months old and my daughter was 4. I get them both 12 days a month but I feel like I'm missing out on their lives so much . Cheer me up some please Not sure if it will cheer you up mate but.... My parents separated when I was very young. Didn't see much of my father growing up, my step dad was good to me. Fast forward 25 years and I got married in May. I was proud to have both my Step-dad and father at the table with me. Having seen some of your posts and the effort you put in, I don't think your in danger of missing out. If I can build a relationship with my father who wasn't the best then just think how your kids will feel about you. All you can do is be there for them and while it might not be easy kids are pretty bright, they'll always know your their dad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bullet1747 Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 Tell what I'd do change my RFD Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TIGHTCHOKE Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 TT I have no idea just how hard this morning must have been for you. But I wish you well and hope you can continue to be there for him. It will all make sense to him eventually. Good luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted November 13, 2016 Author Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 I am a full time father to an 18 month old . I can control what happens in her life tho to which I know I'm a lucky man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted November 13, 2016 Author Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 You need a night out with Sparkie, Alix and I. Ok but you've got to leave the duck tape at home Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted November 13, 2016 Author Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 Sorry to hear mate and I think that's something that frightens the life out of most dads. So you went along aswell and he took him? As long as your kids acknowledge you as dad and I'm sure they do then all you have to do is carry on doing the most for them you can do. Not a lot of dads build wooden carts for their kids like you have and your knowledge in that field enables you to do a lot of fun stuff with them. Your hobbies like shooting,fishing and motor biking etc can bring you brilliant times with them especially your son. Chin up and carry on being DAD. You can offer more to them than many. Cheers dude. The garage is full of projects used less than 10 times because of my limited times. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted November 13, 2016 Author Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 Thank you everyone for you comments I'm hoping my son will work with me in 9 years and we will get our bond back properly. The ex says he won't but here's hoping. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keg Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 Here we go... Wind you neck in mate.... my post was very much tongue in cheek...why the invidious acrimony all the time or are just trying to be deliberately confrontational. And completely uncalled for and insensitive. I don't think anyone read as tongue in cheek. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted November 13, 2016 Author Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 And completely uncalled for and insensitive. I don't think anyone read as tongue in cheek. He's pmd me just to check I knew he was joking . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Konnie Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 Keep your chin up fella, had a chap at work in this boat, Kids are not daft and grow up, and make their own judgements about life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Me matt Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 Separation is never easy where young kids are concerned 😕 My youngest was 3 when my marriage ended, she's 17 now. No idea where the time has gone. Have you found another partner? Took me a few years but did me the world of good. From experience I can honestly say- there will be good and bad times ahead, don't dwell on the bad stuff too much, it's no good for your health, focus more on the happy stuff. I found planning things in advance helped, book up a day out @ legoland/zoo or the like, kids love counting down the days to events like that- well mine did anyway lol Hope that helps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
motty Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 TT, think yourself lucky, there are people in worse situations than yours. A mate of mine is forbidden from seeing his son, all through lies made up by his ex wife. He has been through the courts. He has not seen his son for around two years. Imagine the anguish he has had to put up with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lloyd90 Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 On the bright side mate take a moment to be thankful that you have a bloke who takes care of your children. It appears he's making an effort to make sure they have a good life etc and personally I couldn't knock him for that. Going into social work the amount of people who are horrible/mistreat their own biological children is horrendous, let alone their step kids. I doubt this will make it any better but hope you get some happiness by proxy of your kids getting a good upbringing it's tough on kids when parents split up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldypigeonpopper Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 hello TT, i am not going into my circumstances but i know how this goes with my 2 sons, it does come with a lot of heart ache and missed times that are important to you and good times when you are together having a dad and son time, and do not take any notice of what Xs say as when your son is older say 12/13 it will be up to him how much time he spends with dad, then bear in mind at 13/14/15 its mates or even girlfriend time plus exams, i always said to my boys now in their 40s i am here if you need me or just want to hang out best wishes with you new family and hope the future is good for you ALL !!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archie-fox Posted November 13, 2016 Report Share Posted November 13, 2016 (edited) You, in my opinion my friend, come across as an opinionated, arrogant rather unpleasant person. I've followed some of your posts and your holier than thou attitude is quite sickening. Confrontational ? no, just naturally repulsed by your attitude, are you totally insulated from reality by stupidity....oh, and I'm not your mate ! +1 Edited November 13, 2016 by Archie-fox Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.