figgy Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 This could be the best Christmas present she ever gave you. Only time will tell, you can't turn the clock back so look to your future and do the best for your kids as this won't be their best Christmas either. Chin up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clakk Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 It hurts and then some but life does go on happily remarried now 12 years .The pain will go as Nath said drink is the enemy .Your kids are now the important ones and will keep you sane whilst you sort it out atb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rupert Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 Is there a good time, are you gutted or relieved, one door closes and all that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fortune Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 Never being in this situation I don't understand how everyone gets so upset about the kids ect but seems to accept the situation as a done deal and just give up and not fight to save the marriage. After all the couple did work together to generate a home and A family. Goodness knows is long it would take to sort out my stuff. The wife of a bloke over the road left him (she just walked away and didn't want or took anything from him) and he is just an isolated loner now. Billy no mates comes to mind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuji Shooter Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 Sorry to hear that mate. Hope you only bought a crown. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laird Lugton Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 I would only add that Christmas is a very stressful time for families. Perhaps it can be saved? People say things in the heat of the moment and it tumbles on for a week or so. This is divorce lawyers busiest time of the year. What I am trying to say is perhaps it is a combination of things that can be salvaged? Been there, got the t-shirt & still married Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dougy Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 Fortune. You have said "never been in this situation" But given advice. Lol And that link is funny as in codswallop. There's more suicidal thoughts during a break up in.relationships than anything else. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rupert Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 Medallion, convertible and tinder Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scully Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 That's pretty much how I'm feeling at the moment, trying to be grown up about it. The length and tone of the post doesn't really show my true feelings, just wanted to save PW loads of emotional drivel 😉 We have 2 young children, I am absolutly gutted. Thimgs hadn't been great recently but what marriage is 100% perfect. It's a lot of years ago now and it wasn't Christmas, but I opened a letter from the local council in the mistake it was for me, only to find that my OH had been making inquiries about a council house back in her mothers hometown for her and our two very young children. We were going away on holiday later that day. We carried on through good and bad times for another 15 years or so, and now it's me who is leaving her. Work at it; only you will know if it's worth fighting for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archie-fox Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 I didn't drink for 6 months after my marriage fell apart.. Get advice from a solicitor on what to do...if she's gone for good get it all sorted with legal advice then you both know where you stand..I was devastated at the time but looking back it needed to happen..just be careful with your FAC and SGC put your guns with a RFD then there out of the way..saves any arguments that's what I did, got them back after my divorce was finalised.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craftycarper Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 Why am I giggling at this +1Sod the receipts just bang it all on eBay, her as well Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Livefast123 Posted December 25, 2016 Author Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 Thanks guys, brought a chuckle to me some of the the replies. I'll be fighting to save the marriage with all my heart and feel there are many hours of talking ahead. At least then, I know in my head i've tried. If that doesn't work, well there is plenty of good advice on the thread. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Footu Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 Do You have much holiday left, would you be allowed a couple of weeks compassionate leave? Have you ever been to thailand? its lovely weather this time of year and the fishing is great................ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mel b3 Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 Thanks guys, brought a chuckle to me some of the the replies. I'll be fighting to save the marriage with all my heart and feel there are many hours of talking ahead. At least then, I know in my head i've tried. If that doesn't work, well there is plenty of good advice on the thread. the best reply on the thread , and the very best way forward . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
herby Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 As already said get your refund for prezzies, put your guns away, someone has already kindly offered. You will be in a better place in less than 6 months. We have all been there and know if you do those things it will/could save you a lot more grief. There is a post from someone with no experience and the first reply is from a battle hardened social worker haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spandit Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 Will she go to couples counselling? Took us a long time but sorted a few things out and still together. Cheaper than going through a divorce too but it's hard work. Horrible thing to happen, especially at this time of year and I hope it's not irreconcilable Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mungler Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 (edited) I don't do divorce work (it's just not in me) but my guy who does, himself went through the mother of all divorces - it had everything; police, fighting in the streets, blackmail over the kids. The good news is 6 years on he's found an absolute stunner and recently remarried and his kids are old enough now to joke about what a psycho the mum is. However, at the time when it was happening his life was falling apart and the happy ending far from sight. The problem is that in 95% of cases there's another person. People are inherently insecure and like monkeys they don't let go of a branch until grabbing hold of another. It's that allure of the unreal in the new 'relationship' that squews everything. . Edited December 25, 2016 by Mungler Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted December 25, 2016 Report Share Posted December 25, 2016 What I will say is ..... If their is another man involved you'll have to walk away. I know so many that have tried after but it eats them inside and you'll never trust again . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archie-fox Posted December 26, 2016 Report Share Posted December 26, 2016 I don't do divorce work (it's just not in me) but my guy who does, himself went through the mother of all divorces - it had everything; police, fighting in the streets, blackmail over the kids. The good news is 6 years on he's found an absolute stunner and recently remarried and his kids are old enough now to joke about what a psycho the mum is. However, at the time when it was happening his life was falling apart and the happy ending far from sight. The problem is that in 95% of cases there's another person. People are inherently insecure and like monkeys they don't let go of a branch until grabbing hold of another. It's that allure of the unreal in the new 'relationship' that squews everything. . True... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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