Whacky theories, post them here!

[henry d]

Just for those who have too much time on their hands.

 

Love this a lot 💖

What size was the chainsaw, what size the lumberjack?

[TIGHTCHOKE]

Now where is all that left over mashed potato?

 

Edited January 1, 2021 by TIGHTCHOKE

[Dave-G]

Oooh.

Edited January 1, 2021 by Dave-G

[TIGHTCHOKE]

it's coming along nicely!

[Westward]

The whackiest theory that I can think of is the one about carbon dioxide emissions being the cause of climate change...

[Scully]

Tempting. Very. 

[strimmer_13]

8 minutes ago, Scully said:

Tempting. Very. 

It is 😂

[henry d]

Denver airport, HQ for NWO?

[henry d]

HAARP?

Phoebus cartel?

Tsunami bomb?

Deep state?

[Dave-G]

Under St Mawgan.

[powler]

Space termites

[strimmer_13]

Many years ago, my deeply religious mother was a little eccentric in a normal about way, it was verging on embarrassing whilst I was at school. Id genuinely be worried that I'd get branded of being a weirdo from being raised by her. These were the days before internet, her biggest book was the bible and a few other religious reads. Then came the said 'net'. Well **** me we didn't see this **** storm coming. Since the day she moved back to Wales and got a pc, our lifes have been filled with the most obscene and ridiculous theories I've heard, and I've heard them all. I've had enough this past few years and we've not spoken, I don't want my son having this **** forced down his throat (she even wrote in his Christmas card this year to make sure mummy and daddy don't get you to have the vaccination as it's mind control or some such)..... In the bin it went before I finished 

Regular rants were things like 

Harp and its earthquakes and the certain vibration of the atoms in the sky bla Bla Bla 

Nwo (big one, she has posters of that all over the house and how they are going to need to take out 2/3 of the population 

Bill Gates. Gonna kill us all. 

Tony Blair (this made me laugh like crazy and I nearly agree) is the devil reincarnated 

Chemtrails (why it always rains in Pembrokeshire and her veg don't grow, because of all the aluminium filings and suppressive chemicals they are spraying over you. (I tried teaching her geology and the fact that if you live on the side of a ******* great hill near the coast, it's going to rain a little more) 

Vladimir putin is a hero and nearly a god in her eyes. Again big photos of him and jesus beside each other. He's a very very nice man. 

WiFi. Definitely killing us. She won't use it and it's ethernet only from the WiFi box. Every time I'd walk past I'd turn the wifi on just to **** with her. Goverment see, trying to control you. 

Mobile phones will give me brain cancer. Obviously. Don't even start on 5g, she ain't finished with 4g yet. 

Drinking water (again another one) is full of suppressants to quell us from rising against the goverment 

There was one about Tv, along the lines of mk ultra but can't remember it all. 

Loads and loads more. 

Honestly this is all from easily the most intelligent woman I know, and that's not being biast from being my mother, I can't stand her, but she believes in all that whilst maintaining a pact with her religion. All this from gaining a pc (not a laptop, they have WiFi and Bluetooth....) and being introduced to the Internet. Anything she reads is gospel, has to be right, and fact checks it a million times against other lunatics on other sites before spreading the word (in her eyes). No she doesn't go round town with a billboard, but it is known for her to hang massive signs over her front gate if anybodys ever seen then driving around the preseilis... 

[Zapp]

There used to be rumours local to an army base I was at about there being ICBMs under the main camp car park, which would divide and roll back to allow them to launch in the event of nuclear war.

Presumably several hundred cars piling on them as the halves rolled back wouldnt have caused any problems.

[Scully]

1 hour ago, strimmer_13 said:

It is 😂

😂

[henry d]

31 minutes ago, Dave-G said:

Under St Mawgan.

There's one near anstruther/crail, except there are signposts telling you how to get there, we used to have a shoot around there every fortnight, great woodcock, too many fox.

[johnphilip]

12 hours ago, Zapp said:

There used to be rumours local to an army base I was at about there being ICBMs under the main camp car park, which would divide and roll back to allow them to launch in the event of nuclear war.

Presumably several hundred cars piling on them as the halves rolled back wouldnt have caused any problems.

Hey I belive you Vergil 😀😀

[TIGHTCHOKE]

Now where is Dave G?

[Guest cookoff013]

13 hours ago, strimmer_13 said:

Many years ago, my deeply religious mother was a little eccentric in a normal about way, it was verging on embarrassing whilst I was at school. Id genuinely be worried that I'd get branded of being a weirdo from being raised by her. These were the days before internet, her biggest book was the bible and a few other religious reads. Then came the said 'net'. Well **** me we didn't see this **** storm coming. Since the day she moved back to Wales and got a pc, our lifes have been filled with the most obscene and ridiculous theories I've heard, and I've heard them all. I've had enough this past few years and we've not spoken, I don't want my son having this **** forced down his throat (she even wrote in his Christmas card this year to make sure mummy and daddy don't get you to have the vaccination as it's mind control or some such)..... In the bin it went before I finished 

Regular rants were things like 

Harp and its earthquakes and the certain vibration of the atoms in the sky bla Bla Bla 

Nwo (big one, she has posters of that all over the house and how they are going to need to take out 2/3 of the population 

Bill Gates. Gonna kill us all. 

Tony Blair (this made me laugh like crazy and I nearly agree) is the devil reincarnated 

Chemtrails (why it always rains in Pembrokeshire and her veg don't grow, because of all the aluminium filings and suppressive chemicals they are spraying over you. (I tried teaching her geology and the fact that if you live on the side of a ******* great hill near the coast, it's going to rain a little more) 

Vladimir putin is a hero and nearly a god in her eyes. Again big photos of him and jesus beside each other. He's a very very nice man. 

WiFi. Definitely killing us. She won't use it and it's ethernet only from the WiFi box. Every time I'd walk past I'd turn the wifi on just to **** with her. Goverment see, trying to control you. 

Mobile phones will give me brain cancer. Obviously. Don't even start on 5g, she ain't finished with 4g yet. 

Drinking water (again another one) is full of suppressants to quell us from rising against the goverment 

There was one about Tv, along the lines of mk ultra but can't remember it all. 

Loads and loads more. 

Honestly this is all from easily the most intelligent woman I know, and that's not being biast from being my mother, I can't stand her, but she believes in all that whilst maintaining a pact with her religion. All this from gaining a pc (not a laptop, they have WiFi and Bluetooth....) and being introduced to the Internet. Anything she reads is gospel, has to be right, and fact checks it a million times against other lunatics on other sites before spreading the word (in her eyes). No she doesn't go round town with a billboard, but it is known for her to hang massive signs over her front gate if anybodys ever seen then driving around the preseilis... 

I feel sorry. Ive known a few fruitcakes. But its the same. My friend and i randomly met one of his friends. He ran away because he thought we were tracking him. He read a "religous book" claimed he was god. Then passed out because he refused to eat food.

[henry d]

14 hours ago, strimmer_13 said:

Many years ago, my deeply religious mother was a little eccentric in a normal about way, it was verging on embarrassing whilst I was at school. Id genuinely be worried that I'd get branded of being a weirdo from being raised by her. These were the days before internet, her biggest book was the bible and a few other religious reads. Then came the said 'net'. Well **** me we didn't see this **** storm coming. Since the day she moved back to Wales and got a pc, our lifes have been filled with the most obscene and ridiculous theories I've heard, and I've heard them all. I've had enough this past few years and we've not spoken, I don't want my son having this **** forced down his throat (she even wrote in his Christmas card this year to make sure mummy and daddy don't get you to have the vaccination as it's mind control or some such)..... In the bin it went before I finished 

Regular rants were things like 

Harp and its earthquakes and the certain vibration of the atoms in the sky bla Bla Bla 

Nwo (big one, she has posters of that all over the house and how they are going to need to take out 2/3 of the population 

Bill Gates. Gonna kill us all. 

Tony Blair (this made me laugh like crazy and I nearly agree) is the devil reincarnated 

Chemtrails (why it always rains in Pembrokeshire and her veg don't grow, because of all the aluminium filings and suppressive chemicals they are spraying over you. (I tried teaching her geology and the fact that if you live on the side of a ******* great hill near the coast, it's going to rain a little more) 

Vladimir putin is a hero and nearly a god in her eyes. Again big photos of him and jesus beside each other. He's a very very nice man. 

WiFi. Definitely killing us. She won't use it and it's ethernet only from the WiFi box. Every time I'd walk past I'd turn the wifi on just to **** with her. Goverment see, trying to control you. 

Mobile phones will give me brain cancer. Obviously. Don't even start on 5g, she ain't finished with 4g yet. 

Drinking water (again another one) is full of suppressants to quell us from rising against the goverment 

There was one about Tv, along the lines of mk ultra but can't remember it all. 

Loads and loads more. 

Honestly this is all from easily the most intelligent woman I know, and that's not being biast from being my mother, I can't stand her, but she believes in all that whilst maintaining a pact with her religion. All this from gaining a pc (not a laptop, they have WiFi and Bluetooth....) and being introduced to the Internet. Anything she reads is gospel, has to be right, and fact checks it a million times against other lunatics on other sites before spreading the word (in her eyes). No she doesn't go round town with a billboard, but it is known for her to hang massive signs over her front gate if anybodys ever seen then driving around the preseilis... 

That, apart from the intelligence, is a similar story to one of the people I know. The internet is a Pandora's box and those who want a laugh or to boost their ego have a lot to answer for.

[loriusgarrulus]

There is often a very thin line between genius and insanity. 

[TIGHTCHOKE]

49 minutes ago, loriusgarrulus said:

There is often a very thin line between genius and insanity. 

But the ability to differentiate is key here!

[old man]

Teflon, Liar Bliar for a Knighthood?

[TIGHTCHOKE]

18 minutes ago, old man said:

Teflon, Liar Bliar for a Knighthood?

If he was going to get one it would have been an automatic move when he left parliament.

You can work out why he will NEVER be honoured!

[enfieldspares]

16 hours ago, strimmer_13 said:

 

Mobile phones will give me brain cancer. Obviously. Don't even start on 5g, she ain't finished with 4g yet. 

 

This is true. Using a mobile held close against you head can cause brain cancer. It is the microwaves that the device emits.

Edited January 2, 2021 by enfieldspares

[old man]

1 hour ago, TIGHTCHOKE said:

If he was going to get one it would have been an automatic move when he left parliament.

You can work out why he will NEVER be honoured!

Tis a wacky theory, just wait a mo?

Just a bit too toxic at the time, the constant waft of expenses will eventually addle the tiny cells and it will happen?