fielddweller Posted May 14, 2014 Report Share Posted May 14, 2014 I was chatting with my pal at work this afternoon about changing one thing in life,and we came up with loads.Nothing too serious as third world or health issues more selfish ones. Any how after an hours drive home in the heat,and I am on a diet I chose my one. That god should have made BEER negative calories,go to work bacon sarnie and call in the pub on the way home to burn it off. Tab Fielddweller Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joknob Posted May 14, 2014 Report Share Posted May 14, 2014 if I could change a light bulb...!. craig Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fenboy Posted May 14, 2014 Report Share Posted May 14, 2014 (edited) I would ask him to take two inches from my waist and add two to my **** ! Edited May 14, 2014 by fenboy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
margun Posted May 14, 2014 Report Share Posted May 14, 2014 I would ask him not to let me be stupid enough to put the brand new (today) Raybans under the bonnet while changing the oil then forget to take them away before shutting it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ack-ack Posted May 14, 2014 Report Share Posted May 14, 2014 I would ask him for a can of canine infinity spray. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
woodcock11 Posted May 14, 2014 Report Share Posted May 14, 2014 Please let me not ache so much after a full on day's gardening...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phaedra1106 Posted May 15, 2014 Report Share Posted May 15, 2014 Someone once asked me, "If you could have one thing would you have your wife back" ? It took me about 2 seconds to think about it, I said no, I'd rather have my cat back RIP Mr Ginger T Cat 1985 - 2000 :( Sadly missed and an expert in the Geordie art of doing "Buggerall" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kes Posted May 15, 2014 Report Share Posted May 15, 2014 Wot is canine infinity spray? Selfish but I'd like to have flown a Spitfire and tried a bit of deflection shooting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fandango Posted May 15, 2014 Report Share Posted May 15, 2014 I would ask him to for the ability to understand women,,,,,, oh god the world would a better place if we could Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thunderbird Posted May 15, 2014 Report Share Posted May 15, 2014 Wot is canine infinity spray? I believe he means so your 'man's best friend' actually outlives you, as opposed to what usually happens. I would like it if God could make some of the nicest things in life that are bad for you such as drinking and eating fine rich food, good for you, a bit like the OPs post about 'negative calories.' Oh yeah and world peace, no hunger, war etc. But the food thing first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted May 15, 2014 Report Share Posted May 15, 2014 (edited) Unlimited money in my pocket My mrs back currently Get rid of my broken leg As silly as it sounds tho without sounding like a sissy as long as my parents have good health I'd be happy. Dad had a rafter land on his head 2years ago that brain damaged him so I'd be happy at that. Edited May 15, 2014 by team tractor Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted May 15, 2014 Report Share Posted May 15, 2014 Shame I don't believe in any god since I lost my sister at19 so I'll have some money instead Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ack-ack Posted May 15, 2014 Report Share Posted May 15, 2014 I believe he means so your 'man's best friend' actually outlives you, as opposed to what usually happens. t. That is correct D, i cant afford another can. I got one from a foreign chap in the market a while back, not cheap mind, i paid a monkey but it was worth it - hammered copper it was. You just spray the dog with it and it lives forever. Sadly i lost the can in a bizarre series of events and never got to use it. I went back to the market next week but he wasnt there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul T Posted May 16, 2014 Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 That is correct D, i cant afford another can. I got one from a foreign chap in the market a while back, not cheap mind, i paid a monkey but it was worth it - hammered copper it was. You just spray the dog with it and it lives forever. Sadly i lost the can in a bizarre series of events and never got to use it. I went back to the market next week but he wasnt there. Not quite the same thing, but there's a chap at my local car boot sells 'Wasp Resuscitator Spray'. If one day you find the wasp that's been buzzing round the front window is laying dead on the window sill, you just spray it with this stuff and 'Hey Presto!' it comes back to life. I know you need to wait for the dog to keel over first, but it might be worth a punt. You might need a couple of cans for a dog though. Send me a one-er by Paypal and I'll get you a couple. Oh, and the same bloke does 'Cat Invisibility Spray'. Don't like cats, but don't want to hurt them? Spray them with this and it makes them instantly invisible. I sprayed my neighbours with it, but it just legged it. I've not seen it since though so it must work... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bullet1747 Posted May 16, 2014 Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 to change the doctors diagnosis on my late father told him he didn't have prostate cancer long story short Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Big Al Posted May 16, 2014 Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 I'd like a job I enjoy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dead eye alan Posted May 16, 2014 Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 Not to get any older, cos at my age im having the best time of my life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
islandgun Posted May 16, 2014 Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 I would ask him to take two inches from my waist and add two to my **** ! Is that all I would ask him for a can of canine infinity spray. If it were god given it would have to be divinity spray Not to get any older, cos at my age im having the best time of my life. Amen to that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greymaster Posted May 16, 2014 Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 I would ask him for a can of canine infinity spray. Why not ask for two? I would ask him to man up and not require worshipping by mankind so that religions could not evolve. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
norfolk dumpling Posted May 16, 2014 Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 I'd ask him to convince the world there was no such thing as religion and that the bible was just a good read. And if we could backdate this just think how many wars, killings, suicide bombings, 9/11 etc etc would not have happened. And, if I'm not pushing my luck, could we have honest politicians and police. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penelope Posted May 16, 2014 Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 Ah, but which God? There are shed loads of them. I'd ask him to convince the world there was no such thing as religion and that the bible was just a good read. And if we could backdate this just think how many wars, killings, suicide bombings, 9/11 etc etc would not have happened.And, if I'm not pushing my luck, could we have honest politicians and police. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaptainBeaky Posted May 16, 2014 Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 Ah, but which God? There are shed loads of them.All of them!With the exception of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, of course (may you be touched by his noodly appendage). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
39TDS Posted May 16, 2014 Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 I would ask him to uninvent cyclists. Doesn't have to be all of them, the normal considerate ones can stay. The militant "it is my right to ride on the wrong side of the road" ones deffo need to go. Maybe God doesn't need to do anything, Darwin plays a bigger part. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
overandunder2012 Posted May 16, 2014 Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 to live until im at least 90 lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fielddweller Posted May 16, 2014 Author Report Share Posted May 16, 2014 And, if I'm not pushing my luck, could we have honest politicians and police.That might just be a tad too much even for the good lord himselfFielddweller Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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