Bloody southerners

[Benthejockey]

No offence to you lot what talk a bit apple and hunny (funny) but **** me jesus what happens when you move north of bloody oxford?! There's been an influx of southerners moving up this way recently because you get a lot more bricks to the pound in Shropshire than you do in Londonshire. Can't blame them for that. A few months ago the old neighbours moved out and the new neighbours arrived. In my typical antisocial fashion I hid from them but the girl child and Mrs BTJ went and made the introductions and all was well. After a couple of weeks we unusually left the terrier at home for a couple of hours and for some reason she yapped and whined. They flew out to moan. We apologised. No harm no foul. Fast forward a few more weeks and several pleasant if not prolonged conversations and although I said they were weird we concluded they were just trying to be over friendly since moving up from Laaaandaaaan. 3am one morning and the girl child wakes us up saying they're killing each other next door - her bedroom is right next to one of their upstairs rooms. I said forget about it and after half an hour all was wel again. A few days later lying in bed in postcoital bliss and the screaming and shouting started again this time around 1am. I looked out the window and she wasn't killing the husband it was apparently dog training time but the dog wasn't interested. Again I ignored it and went to sleep. Fast forward now to 3 weeks ago and I come home to find their kitchen in the communal courtyard, Mrs BTJ says oh you've got the trailer I'll offer for you to take it away for them and be neighbourly. Despite my protests the arrangements were made and I was seen to be loading up a whole kitchens worth of **** at 6am and taking it to burn.

Come home tonight after a bloody long day and driving to Warwick and back to help my mate move house in my lorry and picking the girl child up some showjumps for her birthday I backed my 7.5ton wagon into the court yard right to the door and tight into our house so it's not visible from their house. They were lurking in the dark like bloody vampires or something. We've got sister in laws dog for a couple of days whilst she's been away. Off they spouted about the dog barking all day after we left it at 9am this morning and it was 7pm at this point and it had been put for a run with me at 6am this morning so it's highly unlikely to have barked unless the postman or someone knocked the door. Then they moaned about the lorry. Mrs BTJ got a bit upset and gave a bit back and then stormed in the house. She's rung the other neighbours who are also connected and they didn't know we had another dog and they've been in all day. And the neighbours opposite and behind do have proper yappy dogs that bark all day as well as farm dogs about 200yds away that bark early and late.

I mean ********* I know barking dogs are annoying but even if it was barking today it's a rare one off and the same with the lorry I rarely bring it back and always park it right over and it comes in the dark and goes in the dark the next day!

[Adge Cutler]

You have my Sympathies...its just the same here in the heart of the Cotswolds....all the pseudo rich moving in from Middlesex and Surrey with their designer children Bruno and Tiggy.

 

One who really gets on my **** is comedian ( that's a joke in itself ) Dom Joly who writes a regular piece for the Cotswold life under the name of Cotswold Boy .... usually inane ramblings about his trips abroad...what he's got to do with or knows about the Cotswolds you could put on a postage stamp.

 

The publication has deteriorated over the years and now its no more than a glorified Estate Agents Brochure ...they ought to rename it Home Counties Life.

[Saltings]

some people can argue all night, shout, scream, party, bang doors, dogs bark, rev cars, etc but god help any one else who does . new to the area always want to join parish councils and change everything get every bodys back up then move on again

[digger]

When we take our wealth north of Oxford we meet oiks with yapping dogs.

However on the plus side some of them are simple enough to remove the "quaint" kitchens we rip out free of charge. No wonder northern types have small dogs and no money 😊

[vampire]

Thank god they moved up there.

[Benthejockey]

Digger it was a particularly big and stupid English setter barking 😉 I wonder if the neighbours will do some muck spreading soon? That's cow poo digger what the simpletons north of the M25 spread on the grass to make it grow 😜

[digger]

sounds like your neighbours spread their muck at silly o clock.

You have my sympathy ( for having idiot neighbours and also being northern )

Edited October 29, 2016 by digger

[welsh1]

Happens down here in Wales, in the picturesque village my wife comes from complete with local pub on village green.

Some old farm buildings were converted to 4 pretty little cottages and were subsequently bought by retiring couples from that london.
Their little courtyard faces the single track road, and on that road the cows have walked to their milking parlour for as long as anyone can remember,her uncle was 93 and he remembered them walking down the road.

Now cows being cows they tend to leave little messages everywhere,it's not that they don't care, just that no one has made toilets big enough for them.

Well the londoners didn't like the smell of bovine outside their nice new/old properties and started to complain, they went through the village council,no joy, so they went to the council,and complained and complained and complained,and the whinging idiots got their way.

So now the cows are taken a lot longer way round and gates have been made through walls just to appease a few people who thought the countryside smelt of lilacs and everyone was on a long holiday not making a living.
Not surprising not many people speak to them londoners.

[bluesj]

Happens down here in Wales, in the picturesque village my wife comes from complete with local pub on village green.

 

Some old farm buildings were converted to 4 pretty little cottages and were subsequently bought by retiring couples from that london.

Their little courtyard faces the single track road, and on that road the cows have walked to their milking parlour for as long as anyone can remember,her uncle was 93 and he remembered them walking down the road.

Now cows being cows they tend to leave little messages everywhere,it's not that they don't care, just that no one has made toilets big enough for them.

Well the londoners didn't like the smell of bovine outside their nice new/old properties and started to complain, they went through the village council,no joy, so they went to the council,and complained and complained and complained,and the whinging idiots got their way.

 

So now the cows are taken a lot longer way round and gates have been made through walls just to appease a few people who thought the countryside smelt of lilacs and everyone was on a long holiday not making a living.

Not surprising not many people speak to them londoners.

The same sort of thing happened to someone i know, an old barn at the end of HIS drive was converted a bought by some idiots who then kicked up a fuse about the cow poo on the drive getting on their car. So as he had only been letting them use his drive because it joined the road at a safer place than theirs he put up a fence across the access they had been using so they had to use their own It didn't go down well, threats of court action and all sorts

[955i]

I think its a shame us normal people have to put up with all you backward ******* who still think its the 18th century

[Mungler]

You have my Sympathies...its just the same here in the heart of the Cotswolds....all the pseudo rich moving in from Middlesex and Surrey with their designer children Bruno and Tiggy.

 

 

Range Rover, wife that looks like a hung over Sienna Miller (with obligatory sun glasse perched on head) and children with big hair

[Thunderbird]

Famously, (google it), the headline "One family's desperate search for a second pony" appeared on the front cover of Cotswold Life a while back.

[TIGHTCHOKE]

I think it's good that you northerners are getting some of our unwanted herberts!

 

 

Time to send some more!

[norfolk dumpling]

We moved from Norwich subburbs to Sth Norfolk a few years back and were treated like outcasts by the local inbreds. Even though my family background was farming - I took a different route in life as I wasn't going to inherit the acres - it was as if I had come from another planet with one smallholder. When we had some serious difference over his strange farming practises his favourite expression was "...why don't you go back to Norwich you ****". I have never actually lived in Norwich but this was a guy who was 45 before he first ventured out of Norfolk. Also this family really hated the fact that I took early retirement @ 53 but could still buy a new car every couple of years of so. So narrow minded and predjudiced to anything they didn't understand. New neighbours who arrived somewhat later, who are 'townies', also encountered similar problems. The village idiot decided to plant 50t of chicken muck near new neighbours fence early one summer and when asked nicely to move it "**** off" was the response. Public Health of course paid him a visit and then there was a campaign of minor intimidation against newby and me!!

 

You don't have to move North to South or visa versa to encounter childish predjudiced.

[Guest stevo]

Up the northerners ........ 🖕🏿

 

Lots of love from the south

 

Haha

[Benthejockey]

I'm fairly easy going really and don't care and really do try not to wind people up but these lot do just take the biscuit. I'm waiting for hem to moan about Gordon the cockerel who's been there for the last 12 months. Spring will come and the light mornings and so will Gordon's morning chorus.

[belly47]

[norfolk dumpling]

I actually love winding up the inbreds - all I have to do is to walk my dogs regularly in the neighbourhood. You can see the angst in them knowing I'm a gentleman of leisure!

[Wilksy II]

Just as long as all displaced oxfordoians don't bolt further north, like Yorkshire! Don't come it's rubbish,you wouldn't like it!

[Ollieollie]

I think it's good that you northerners are getting some of our unwanted herberts!

 

 

Time to send some more!

Making room for the new french people heading our way, keep them down there when they arrive will you

[TIGHTCHOKE]

Oh no, the pseudo french (gained by their duration in country) will be spread all over, with the most going to Yorkshire where diversification is most needed!

[JDog]

Having lived in the north, the south, the east, the west and Scotland I can say from my own limited experiences that such problems are created not geography but by human nature. We all have differing views and opinions. How strange would it be if we all thought along the same lines?

[islandgun]

Having lived in the north, the south, the east, the west and Scotland I can say from my own limited experiences that such problems are created not geography but by human nature. We all have differing views and opinions. How strange would it be if we all thought along the same lines?

 

my thoughts exactly !

[scotslad]

Having lived in the north, the south, the east, the west and Scotland I can say from my own limited experiences that such problems are created not geography but by human nature. We all have differing views and opinions. How strange would it be if we all thought along the same lines?

 

Aye but i bet if u move into an area u try to fit in with wot is already there and mix, not to moan and complain and to change everything about it that has happily existed for decades/centuries before.

And then when u don't get ur way go on to every local group/committee there is, fill more posts with other white settlers until u can change things the way they want.

 

Bloody white settlers, just force the price of rural housing up then local folk that actually ork in poorly paid rural jobs can neither afford to buy or rent houses

Edited October 30, 2016 by scotslad

[Chris Bb]

Bloody white settlers, just force the price of rural housing up then local folk that actually ork in poorly paid rural jobs can neither afford to buy or rent houses

 

I've nothing against people buying (rural) houses to live in as they'll be vacating another home elsewhere, it's the second homes that sit empty for 50 weeks a year that really get to me.