ladyjack Posted January 13, 2016 Report Share Posted January 13, 2016 Thanks for the replies. Some really good advice, others not so much, but thanks for taking the time all the same I'm going away for a few days tomorrow, I may bring it up again at the end of the week and see how it goes. I have a feeling it won't go particularly well, but if I can get he to talk to me before her stubbornness kicks in then I may be in with a chance of getting though to her. tell her your going to thia land and bringing a lady boy back,at least then there will be someone in the house with a pair of balls Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
guzzicat Posted January 13, 2016 Report Share Posted January 13, 2016 Say you have changed your mind, you have met a great bunch of biker guys (&gals) & you are planning on buying a huge jap bike & going out for runs with them every night once the weather turns, I think I would do both (AGAIN ) anyway Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fenboy Posted January 13, 2016 Report Share Posted January 13, 2016 Crikey , I wonder how many of you chaps offering relationship advice are going to end up sad and lonely old men or all ready are I love my shooting and fishing , but would I put if before my marrage or children , not on your nelly . The issue is simple enough to get past anyway by keeping any gun elsewhere until such a time she may become a little more understanding . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted January 13, 2016 Report Share Posted January 13, 2016 (edited) Crikey , I wonder how many of you chaps offering relationship advice are going to end up sad and lonely old men or all ready are I love my shooting and fishing , but would I put if before my marrage or children , not on your nelly . The issue is simple enough to get past anyway by keeping any gun elsewhere until such a time she may become a little more understanding . Ive a few mates that are controlled by the wife and I'd rather be single and lonely. It's not the guns bit but the one sided arguments. My mates won't say boo to their wives but I have to say I've argued with my mrs and we both know where we stand and couldn't be happier We've got engaged and want another child next year . I wouldn't be without her but I'd never stop her doing anything unless we were skint and I've just bought her a new car as a present as we are that good. My Mrs goes shooting with me and I love it. I spoil her in return and go doing the rubbish bits like shopping together . It's give and take Edited January 13, 2016 by team tractor Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fenboy Posted January 13, 2016 Report Share Posted January 13, 2016 Ive a few mates that are controlled by the wife and I'd rather be single and lonely. It's not the guns bit but the one sided arguments. My mates won't say boo to their wives but I have to say I've argued with my mrs and we both know where we stand and couldn't be happier We've got engaged and want another child next year . I wouldn't be without her but I'd never stop her doing anything unless we were skint and I've just bought her a new car as a present as we are that good. Thing is she sounds more like a concerned wife than a controling one , their is a big difference . When issue's arise , they need working around / out , not the law laying down from one side or the other . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gemini52 Posted January 13, 2016 Report Share Posted January 13, 2016 Dont see why not. I lived away from home for about 4 years and it wasn't an issue. Moved from Norfolk to north wales to go to uni. The little flat I was renting had **** walls and tbh I didn't really have time for shooting anyways so left my guns at home/parents. Since I essentially was living in wales I had to get my SGC transferred to them but told them of the sitaution and it was all fine. I was registered with the welsh force at my little flats address but my safe/gun address was my parents. My parents aren't cert holders either. Did the same for two years with the cambridgeshire force. they were fine with it. Got a mate in cambridgeshire to hold one of my guns for me whilst I was there and the rest just stayed at home. Like i said we are under merseyside,when i applied for a sgc some eighteen years ago,my wife was summond to the local nick for a interview with the feo,one of the first questions was are you happy with firearms in the house,merseyside adjust the rules to suit themselves,they allways have done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davyo Posted January 13, 2016 Report Share Posted January 13, 2016 (edited) I wouldnt bring guns into the house if my wife felt uneasy with them & i certainly wouldnt attempt to compromise.Wouldnt feel comfortable knowing she really didnt want them but was keeping stumb just to keep the piece.And yes a FEO should be asking her how she feels flowing the Atherton Case.And only a man with something to hide would object. Edited January 13, 2016 by Davyo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HDAV Posted January 13, 2016 Report Share Posted January 13, 2016 (edited) And on the other side of the fence we see the totally rational http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/363941-to-tell-dh-that-he-can-t-keep-his-shotgun/AllOnOnePage Edited January 13, 2016 by HDAV Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted January 13, 2016 Report Share Posted January 13, 2016 (edited) And on the other side of the fence we see the totally rational http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/363941-to-tell-dh-that-he-can-t-keep-his-shotgun/AllOnOnePageHa ha what a load of muppets. People need educating These will be the same mums that will always say they will never take the kids away from the father if they split up but then refuse access. Edited January 13, 2016 by team tractor Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Breastman Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 And on the other side of the fence we see the totally rational http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/363941-to-tell-dh-that-he-can-t-keep-his-shotgun/AllOnOnePage You can always rely on Mumsnet to 'prove' female stereo types I like it how the phrase "you are not being unreasonable" is used so many times it has to have its own acronym!! http://www.mumsnet.com/info/acronyms Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Penelope Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 Jesus H. Christ! And on the other side of the fence we see the totally rational http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/363941-to-tell-dh-that-he-can-t-keep-his-shotgun/AllOnOnePage Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Westward Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 Christ almighty. Who are these harridans on mumsnet? Where do they come from? How did their brains get so messed up? They utterly fail to appreciate that power has responsibilties, these include not making decisions through knee jerk emotions or from a position of ignorance of the subject matter. These control freaks are the living proof that power corrupts! Some of them could even be in management positions under the "positive discrimination" regimes that employers are shamed into operating. No wonder our historic freedoms are being steadily stripped away if half the population thinks like them! Lemme (Motorhead) Kilmister said words to the effect of: If there was time travel and you could go back to the 70s for a week, you wouldn't want to come back here... I know exactly what he meant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bruno22rf Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 Christ on a bike-these half witted bints shooting off their unlocked mouths are far more damaging than any gun that I have seen-when push comes to shove its a fact that if you were to place a child and a gun in a room the more dangerous of the 2 would not be made of metal. All of my 3 kids have grown up around guns and I know for a fact that I could leave a firearm in any one of their rooms and it would not get touched. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Mighty Prawn Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 Loving the odd person in that mumsnet who tries to point out there is nothing dangerous about an unloaded gun locked in a cabinet, then the next ten all thinking it's going to be left in the cot with a bayonet fitted for good measure Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McSpredder Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 Is this about child safety, or is it about you? ...she doesn't want the kids thinking guns are normal...Regardless of where guns might be stored, will she be telling the children "Your father uses a gun. Guns are not normal." How soon before the word spreads around the school "Dad has a gun, and Mum says he is abnormal"? She has no issue with me shooting...Is this actually true? It is difficult to reconcile with the view that guns are not normal. If her concern is about safety of the children, would she be happy if they wanted to walk to school, ride bicycles or ponies, swim, play rugby, take up hill walking/climbing/winter sports, etc? Does she allow you to drive them in the car? Do you by any chance keep a box of matches in the kitchen, and can of petrol in the garage for the car or lawnmower? People who worry about danger from guns sometimes forget that on average there are about 1800 road deaths each year in UK (most due to reckless behaviour, but some deliberate), 400 drownings, several hundred deaths due to fire (of which about 100 result from deliberate arson attacks), 10 deaths from horse riding, around 600 cases of child abduction, etc, etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ehb102 Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 And on the other side of the fence we see the totally rational http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/363941-to-tell-dh-that-he-can-t-keep-his-shotgun/AllOnOnePage Ooh, that thread will be ten years old next year. Everyone who is scared of guns has a good reason for being that way, no matter how wrong they are or we think they are. It doesn't help when the attitude of gun owners is "We get to do what we want, and if you don't like it we'll do something you won't like." So now we've got two issues, the first is ignorance of guns and how they work, and the second is gun owners who are unable to cope with people who don't agree with them. Nice. Respect to every man on here who has said they would put their partner first, and communicate about the issue. Being pregnant makes you incredibly vulnerable. If you can't count on your partner to put you first then you've made a rotten choice of father for your children. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Westward Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 Ooh, that thread will be ten years old next year. I really hope that most of their comments are just internet bravado. If their comments are real then IMO they should spend less time controlling their partner and more time controlling their children. At least then there'd better behaved young people and a lot less single mothers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sian Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 I really hope that most of their comments are just internet bravado. If their comments are real then IMO they should spend less time controlling their partner and more time controlling their children. At least then there'd better behaved young people and a lot less single mothers. Internet bravado usually is a man thing. I do not agree with their comments at all but they will not be bravado they will actually believe and think that way and that is the problem - lots and lots of people will see it that way and ebh102 is right in stating that it does not help the way some 'gun owners' come across - its a vicious circle. I doubt the issues surrounding guns that we are discussing has much of an impact on how many single mothers there are or indeed the behaviour of children. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davyo Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 Ooh, that thread will be ten years old next year. Everyone who is scared of guns has a good reason for being that way, no matter how wrong they are or we think they are. It doesn't help when the attitude of gun owners is "We get to do what we want, and if you don't like it we'll do something you won't like." So now we've got two issues, the first is ignorance of guns and how they work, and the second is gun owners who are unable to cope with people who don't agree with them. Nice. Respect to every man on here who has said they would put their partner first, and communicate about the issue. Being pregnant makes you incredibly vulnerable. If you can't count on your partner to put you first then you've made a rotten choice of father for your children. Well said. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bostonmick Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 Can I ask.was the op aware of his partners position on keeping guns at home prior to application.was he aware from any of his shooting friends of his forces attitude to guns being kept at a different address. And was he a member of basc prior to application. If he was aware of the first two then to my mind he would have been well advised to join basc beforehand as they can and will help members with these type of problems.However if like a lot of people they do not join because it costs a few quid then well he is largely on his own against the authorities. regardless of any advice from this forum.And I would not give much for his chances. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CharlieT Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 This all goes to show what an intolerant society we have become and even more, what a great divide there is between those who have grown up the countryside and those who live in towns. I've just come back from lunch with my wife in a local pub. In the bar there was a small group of chaps that had obviously been shooting, I know that because their guns were propped up against their chairs. In a rack in the bar were todays newspapers and the latest copies of various shooting magazines, just a little service the pub offers to entertain their customers. This, with the roaring fire together with a couple of dogs and various children made for a very pleasant atmosphere and an enjoyable leisurely lunch. I wonder what Mumsnet, or the OP's girlfriend for that matter, would have made of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_G Posted January 14, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 This all goes to show what an intolerant society we have become and even more, what a great divide there is between those who have grown up the countryside and those who live in towns. I've just come back from lunch with my wife in a local pub. In the bar there was a small group of chaps that had obviously been shooting, I know that because their guns were propped up against their chairs. In a rack in the bar were todays newspapers and the latest copies of various shooting magazines, just a little service the pub offers to entertain their customers. This, with the roaring fire together with a couple of dogs and various children made for a very pleasant atmosphere and an enjoyable leisurely lunch. I wonder what Mumsnet, or the OP's girlfriend for that matter, would have made of it. She'd have been fine with it. You've completey missed the point of the issue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CharlieT Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 She'd have been fine with it. You've completey missed the point of the issue. So you are saying that she would be completly happy for herself and her children to enjoy lunch with shotguns leaning against the next table but not happy with the same guns locked in a safe in the home. I'm even more bemused ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_G Posted January 14, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 So you are saying that she would be completly happy for herself and her children to enjoy lunch with shotguns leaning against the next table but not happy with the same guns locked in a safe in the home. I'm even more bemused ! She's been around shotguns, air rifles with both me and my 7 yo daughter shooting. There wasn't a problem. She has decided she doesn't want one in the house, whether it's only during her pregnancy or at all, I'm yet to find out. It could come from the increased risk of break ins if any of the local scum find out there is a gun being kept locked up somewhere in the house. Like I said, I've not got to the bottom of it. For the time being I'm going to repect her wishes and I'm going to go though the FEO visit and discuss my options with him/her and go from there. There is never an issue with anything else I get up to, bike, climbing, motorcycles etc. She's pretty good as far as girlfriend's go. Just this time round she's got an issue. So I'll just wait and see. It'll work out in the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sian Posted January 14, 2016 Report Share Posted January 14, 2016 Mr G you will sort it eventually. I would really be interested to know after these exhausting ten pages whether you actually got any help whatsoever from us or whether you just felt it was a waste of time asking - that is a serious question. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts