ditchman Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 Well.............we have had a busy 10 days...nearly 2 weeks ago god and me had a little chat....sort of went like this.. "hi there ditchman ...hows it hangin ?"..says god "yeah..... not too bad...bit of a struggle,...mustnt grumble tho' "..............."look " says god..."ive been reading your threads on pigeonwatch...and you have too many running...quite simply your mind is making appointments , that you body cant keep "................"yes " says i.........."how are we going to sort this then...cause i cant let people down" "weelll says god " (scratching his long white beard)........"ive got and idea"........................... "goes like this.........................."normally i give people like you a lot of deseases over a period of a few years...it allows them to gently get used to the idea of mortality...puts them in the frame of mind of getting used to the idea of "standing outside gods waiting room".... "ok" says i ....."whats the catch" ? "weeelllll.....my idea is...so as to keep the grim reaper happy and so he can have a good larf.........im going to give you alll these deseases in 10 days....(bearing in mind it only took 7 days to make the world)...miricles are easily performed...but the impossible generally takes a bit longer" so folks........thats what he did... beginning of last week diagnosed with celiac's desease followed by trip to hostipital (mild heart problem...ecg and all that stuff)...loads of pills an' stuff then blood pressure gone stupid...pills for that.(to relax the arteries) blood tests piddle tests BIG CHOLESTROL PROBLEM........statins for that and continue gluten diet then diagnosed with anemia then finally diagnosed with diabetes ALL IN THE SPACE OF 10 DAYS...!!! so im going to take it easy for a while..........the funny thing is i am starting to feel soooo much better...got an app' with the docs to see the diabetes nurse on friday regards the management of it...and the main thing is my willy is fine...and my Doctor....Doctor Anna..(she is german and HOT ...very touchy feely)....was responsible for my high blood pressure...she has an AWSOME rear end...................but i digress now.......... i will continue to complete the threads... but in fits and starts "BETTER TO BURN OUT ..THAN FADE AWAY" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Longstrider Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 Strewth man ! Thank goodness the willy is still OK ! Sounds like its about the only bit that doesn't need a bit of help right now. Take it easy, do what the docs tell you to do, and keep taking the tablets. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
panoma1 Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 Just normal getting old stuff then! ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deny essex Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 Join the club ditchy ,more doctors and hospital visits than sitting in a field, hope it all balances out for you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rewulf Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 Chin up mate, sounds like god is being a bit of an ----. But at least Willy is OK , who is Willy ? Your dog , manservant ? ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ditchman Posted July 17, 2018 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 5 minutes ago, Rewulf said: Chin up mate, sounds like god is being a bit of an ----. But at least Willy is OK , who is Willy ? Your dog , manservant ? ? i didnt have any toys ..as a boy ...thats all i had ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Medic1281 Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 Sounds like they all go hand in hand. Sort out your diet and the rest will sort itself out. Best of luck with it all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Newbie to this Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 Hope it all sorts itself out Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Westley Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 20 minutes ago, ditchman said: i didnt have any toys ..as a boy ...thats all i had ! Careful then.....................I woke up blind in one eye due to detached retina ! Now sorted, thankfully. My old man once said to me, many years ago, "You will go blind if you don't stop that" , seems he was half right anyhow ! Chin up mate and keep hangin in there. Best wishes, W. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fse10 Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 52 minutes ago, ditchman said: Well.............we have had a busy 10 days...nearly 2 weeks ago god and me had a little chat....sort of went like this.. "hi there ditchman ...hows it hangin ?"..says god "yeah..... not too bad...bit of a struggle,...mustnt grumble tho' "..............."look " says god..."ive been reading your threads on pigeonwatch...and you have too many running...quite simply your mind is making appointments , that you body cant keep "................"yes " says i.........."how are we going to sort this then...cause i cant let people down" "weelll says god " (scratching his long white beard)........"ive got and idea"........................... "goes like this.........................."normally i give people like you a lot of deseases over a period of a few years...it allows them to gently get used to the idea of mortality...puts them in the frame of mind of getting used to the idea of "standing outside gods waiting room".... "ok" says i ....."whats the catch" ? "weeelllll.....my idea is...so as to keep the grim reaper happy and so he can have a good larf.........im going to give you alll these deseases in 10 days....(bearing in mind it only took 7 days to make the world)...miricles are easily performed...but the impossible generally takes a bit longer" so folks........thats what he did... beginning of last week diagnosed with celiac's desease followed by trip to hostipital (mild heart problem...ecg and all that stuff)...loads of pills an' stuff then blood pressure gone stupid...pills for that.(to relax the arteries) blood tests piddle tests BIG CHOLESTROL PROBLEM........statins for that and continue gluten diet then diagnosed with anemia then finally diagnosed with diabetes ALL IN THE SPACE OF 10 DAYS...!!! so im going to take it easy for a while..........the funny thing is i am starting to feel soooo much better...got an app' with the docs to see the diabetes nurse on friday regards the management of it...and the main thing is my willy is fine...and my Doctor....Doctor Anna..(she is german and HOT ...very touchy feely)....was responsible for my high blood pressure...she has an AWSOME rear end...................but i digress now.......... i will continue to complete the threads... but in fits and starts "BETTER TO BURN OUT ..THAN FADE AWAY" There can be only one " Ditchman" . Hope it gets better for you sir. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vince Green Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 (edited) Always look on the bright side, I have said this very seriously to myself in the past. Its lucky you are not a horse...……. Actually, you are lucky you are not an American people think I'm being flippant but I'm not at all. The treatment we get here is amazing compared to anywhere else. Edited July 17, 2018 by Vince Green Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 Don't want to worry you, but erectile disfunction and diabetes are linked, so get your blood sugar under control asap Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vince Green Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 (edited) 4 minutes ago, amateur said: Don't want to worry you, but erectile disfunction and diabetes are linked, so get your blood sugar under control asap A lolly stick and two rubber bands will sort that that out. He's very practical Edited July 17, 2018 by Vince Green Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Westley Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 45 minutes ago, Medic1281 said: Sounds like they all go hand in hand. Sort out your diet and the rest will sort itself out. Best of luck with it all. I think you could be right there..........."99 times, change hands, don't care if I do go blind" ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harrycatcat1 Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 I hope that you can get all your "issues" sorted soon. Take it easy for a while at least. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TIGHTCHOKE Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 Bloody hell Simon, I've only just seen this, take it easy and get yourself sorted mate, PLEASE! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ditchman Posted July 17, 2018 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 1 hour ago, Medic1281 said: Sounds like they all go hand in hand. Sort out your diet and the rest will sort itself out. Best of luck with it all. you are not far wrong there...the reason i am feeling so much better is because of the strict diet i have imposed on myself...so hopefully as you say it will go some way to sorting it all out.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Winston72 Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 Cut your losses Ditchy get to Dignitas Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ditchman Posted July 17, 2018 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 2 minutes ago, Winston72 said: Cut your losses Ditchy get to Dignitas cruel swine..............anyway they are fully booked at the moment Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Winston72 Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 If they're doing buy one get one free take Harsner , he must be due to call it a day soon . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ditchman Posted July 17, 2018 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 (edited) 1 hour ago, Westley said: I think you could be right there..........."99 times, change hands, don't care if I do go blind" ! never get as far as 99...........changing hands...is that what "ambidicstrous" means. Edited July 17, 2018 by ditchman Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itchy trigger Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 1 hour ago, amateur said: Don't want to worry you, but erectile disfunction and diabetes are linked, so get your blood sugar under control asap have a pal with diabetes, gets his viagra on the nhs, should add a qualifier to that as not seen him for a couple of years as don't shoot there anymore, so it might not apply now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vince Green Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 36 minutes ago, itchy trigger said: have a pal with diabetes, gets his viagra on the nhs, should add a qualifier to that as not seen him for a couple of years as don't shoot there anymore, so it might not apply now. That could be taken two different ways Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted July 17, 2018 Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 This year as you know I’ve had my fingers sown back together and also had my appointment come through today for my vasectomy and I can get it for free now again Obviously it’s not my ticker or blood so I’m great full for that. hope you get sorted Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ditchman Posted July 17, 2018 Author Report Share Posted July 17, 2018 (edited) 56 minutes ago, team tractor said: This year as you know I’ve had my fingers sown back together and also had my appointment come through today for my vasectomy and I can get it for free now again Obviously it’s not my ticker or blood so I’m great full for that. hope you get sorted thank god for that....at least you can "milk the lizard"....again..................... every cloud has a silver lining eh........... Edited July 17, 2018 by ditchman Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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