panoma1 Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 This smacks of a battle of wills! Give in now and should you stay together you will be well and truly gelded in this relationship for the future! She will know she has you bested, and every time, from here on in she wants or doesn't want something, she knows she will have the final say!.......Your decision! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Duckandswing Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 My wife at the time was the same. I just printed off the guidelines for the safe possession of a firearm/shotgun and went through it with her. I took her to gun shops with me, went through the safety issues in the gun shop with her. Demonstrated that the gun itself couldn't hurt anyone, its the person holding it. I also went through how cartridges are not a danger in themselves. It then boiled down to the fact that I loved shooting and that no harm to anyone could come from my shotguns unless I did it. That then demonstrated that it came down to her trusting me. If she didn't trust me with a shotgun, then she didn't trust me. As for the kids, mine know all of the safety aspects of guns, and they are familiar with how they work. They respect them 100% and would never abuse them. They don't see Daddy having a gun as being weird. In my household, guns and shooting sports are the norm and I firmly believe every house should be like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rupert Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Find another primary hobby. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scully Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 My dear old Mam once told me 'you'll never bring a gun into this house'. I had to make two trips for them when I moved out. I can understand your OH's reluctance but there comes a time when you have to make a stand, and this sounds like that time to me. My OH told me that if I got a job working away she would leave, but she didn't ...... unfortunately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrowningB525 Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 What about using the cabinet for when you want the gun (say weekend) and storing it at an RFD for the rest of the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_G Posted January 10, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Thanks for the replies. Some really good advice, others not so much, but thanks for taking the time all the same I'm going away for a few days tomorrow, I may bring it up again at the end of the week and see how it goes. I have a feeling it won't go particularly well, but if I can get he to talk to me before her stubbornness kicks in then I may be in with a chance of getting though to her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evo Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 man up you wuss, get the cabinet fitted in the loft and tell her to "shut the **** up" good luck cos I wouldn,t dare tell my wife that as I,d end up with a sore jaw and on my backside :lol: little tip,,,,, wear a crash helmet when you tell her :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davyo Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Tell her your the boss in this house and if she don't like it then " she can make the beds on her own" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_G Posted January 10, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 man up you wuss, get the cabinet fitted in the loft and tell her to "shut the **** up" good luck cos I wouldn,t dare tell my wife that as I,d end up with a sore jaw and on my backside :lol: little tip,,,,, wear a crash helmet when you tell her :lol: Haha! Crash helmet and full American football padding... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rodp Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 I had the same when the kids were born. Up to you if you want to keep the peace. My dear wife gives me a lot of freedom to be honest, always has. It just wasn't worth causing hassle at the time, she never moaned about me going climbing / diving / 4x4 trials so I just laid off the guns for a while. As the kids grew a bit an airgun "appeared" in the house, it got used for plinking by me and the kids, then a shotgun "appeared", then another. All of a sudden it seems we have a rack or air rifles, a cabinet of shotguns and another for fac. More haste less speed, take your time and you'll get everything you want with no hassle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oowee Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Compromise or capitulation? Its late in the day for finding such differences in outlook between partners. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigbird Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 From a female perspective (who has incidentally shot all her life) many of my friends are frightened of guns because they don't understand them or understand that they can be safe. Take her clay shooting..... But be prepared to buy her a gun when she's smashed a few Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_G Posted January 10, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 I had the same when the kids were born. Up to you if you want to keep the peace. My dear wife gives me a lot of freedom to be honest, always has. It just wasn't worth causing hassle at the time, she never moaned about me going climbing / diving / 4x4 trials so I just laid off the guns for a while. As the kids grew a bit an airgun "appeared" in the house, it got used for plinking by me and the kids, then a shotgun "appeared", then another. All of a sudden it seems we have a rack or air rifles, a cabinet of shotguns and another for fac. More haste less speed, take your time and you'll get everything you want with no hassle No a bad idea, the problem is the wheels are already in motion. I can't just tell the FEO I want to stop the application without it throwing up questions can I? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BerettaSV10 Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Keeping it at your dad's house for the present time might be the best option, until you can talk her around if possible. One advantage of your dad getting a sgc is that he can borrow your gun while your working and keep it clean for you. I don't know what the shooting places are like up your place, but down here its female friendly and welcomes lady shooters or partners. If you have grounds like this and has ladies go their could be an opportunity for your partner to talk to the other ladies to see how they handle guns in and out of the house. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_G Posted January 10, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 From a female perspective (who has incidentally shot all her life) many of my friends are frightened of guns because they don't understand them or understand that they can be safe. Take her clay shooting..... But be prepared to buy her a gun when she's smashed a few I'd love her to come along with me, if only to show her evening is ok and no one is unsafe. Even better if she said let's have a go, but I think she is just scared of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JBS Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Grow a pair *** Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Imperfection Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Being realistic here,but you really only have two options-tell her this is how its gong to be or find another hobby. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hendrix's rifle Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Tell her how it is, my O/H said as long as you don't make me eat anything you've shot. She still ate a rabbit though :L should have seen her face :L Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Geordie Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Who pays the rent or mortgage? If you, then just have a cabinet fitted! Personally if I was given that I would walk! My new GF has no problems with me shooting nor having the cabinets, but then it's MY house, when or IF we move in together I will have the cabinets in before the furniture! If she ain't happy I will still have my own house! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kernel gadaffi Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 I was a shooter from the age of 7, I'll be 55 in a couple of weeks, mine isn't a fan of guns, but she knows they are a very big part of my life, has been with me clay and rabbit shooting, they put food on the table and whatever spare there is, gets traded for meals in the pub, fruit and veg from allotment holders and any other way I can trade them, if the day ever comes when she objects to the guns in the house, I'll be going with them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rupert Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 How about, the compromise you get the shotgun but no shells in the house, I know a few couples who started this way, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_G Posted January 10, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 That's what I'm hoping to do, Rupert. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nighteye Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Tell her you just want the sgc to make "borrowing" a gun a possibility and to buy cartridges , THEN , when she's out put the gun in the safe , every time you go to the safe you are just getting cartridges 😉, might want two safes whilst you are at it , "saved a fortune love!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old farrier Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Hi Get your certificate You don't have to buy a gun Put the cabinet in Then tell her it's a requirement You don't have to have a gun !!!! just means you can buy ammo to shoot your mates at the club and if you decide to have one you can get one later alot of the others have said what I would have done but that won't help you Now man up All the best Of Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
geordieh Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Being a stubborn little shot, any body trying to stop me doing something I wanted to do or make me do something I didn't want to do would get short thrift she would get the option of moving back to her mother or minding her own business.Probably why I am on wife number 4.Give her the option living with guns or living with her mother or on her own Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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