Lost Lives

[Scully]

It’s on BBC 2 as I type. I can’t watch it any longer as it’s totally depressing. I have a son and daughter, and just listened to a mother describe how she would get into her dead sons bed and cry herself to sleep.

I once heard an Irish writer ( playwright ?) say that as a young man there was many a cause he would have killed for, but as a mature adult and a father, was so pleased he hadn’t. 
Anyhow, am off to bed. 

Edited March 8, 2020 by Scully

[The Mighty Prawn]

Wife lost her brother and does talk about him but father in law hardly mentions, a week ago he sent a text to her out of the blue where he laid out how he feels with his lad “cold in the ground” can’t imagine what it feels like but he’s a tough guy and I’ve never known him to be so open with his feelings - I think it’s a good thing to talk though, the stiff upper lip is just tightening the lid, the pressure just builds up more until one day it pops

[TIGHTCHOKE]

Parents are meant to die before their offspring, I cannot begin to comprehend how difficult it must be to have to bury a child.

[pork chop]

I’ve never felt heart break n pain so much losing my son 

[figgy]

It's no wonder, when so many lost children to ww1 &ww2 they never talked about it much.

It's an awful thing to happen and to witness how hard it hits the parents.

[captainhastings]

It don't bare thinking about

[Taileron]

6 hours ago, TIGHTCHOKE said:

Parents are meant to die before their offspring, I cannot begin to comprehend how difficult it must be to have to bury a child.

It’s simply the worst thing imaginable. 

 

6 hours ago, pork chop said:

I’ve never felt heart break n pain so much losing my son 

I’m with you buddy. I lost my daughter 02-Sep-19, she was 18, died after contracting glandular fever. I watched the whole thing happen in front of me stood in casualty in utter disbelief. The funeral was terrible, I felt I was going out of my mind. If I didn’t have other children and a wife to look after, I wouldn’t be here now. The grief is unbearable but we have to endure and keep going for the other ones in our lives. 

[JohnfromUK]

I have attended two funerals - both in families I know very well indeed, where a child (and in one case a grandchild) were the departed.  Incurable illness in one case and motor accident in the other.

It was desperately hard as a friend and must have been much worse still for family.  The only thing I would say - is that in both cases the fact that the churches were packed to overflowing shows how many share the loss and how much real support there is in local communities.  Sometimes funerals for the elderly are a less attended as so many of the friends and relatives of the departed are no longer around themselves.

Almost all of my parents generation are now gone - and my generation is starting to see losses - a sign I'm getting old!

[FOXHUNTER1]

1 hour ago, captainhastings said:

It don't bare thinking about

Too true , impossible to imagine the pain and heart break. I nearly lost my wife and unborn daughter when she was rushed to hospital with preeclampsia,  luckily they both survived. 

[steve_b_wales]

I lost my son, 16 years ago, when he was 14 years old. There's not a day when he's not in my thoughts. During the first year that he had gone, I didn't touch his bedroom, not even moving the pair of socks that he had left on the floor. 

[JDog]

Life can be very cruel at times. How loss is dealt with is crucial.

When I lost someone very close to me I made the mistake of trying to be tough about it. Years later I realised that I should have mourned in a different way.

 

[Scully]

Without meaning to diminish by any means, the posts which have previously been posted ( I have lost a child also ) it was a programme about all the ‘lives lost’ ( innocents ) during ‘ the troubles’. I just seemed to pick up the programme at the point it was focussing in children caught up in bombings and killings, in particular two young sisters killed during a bombing by the UDF, and two young men abducted and murdered for whatever reason. One of them was in his late teens, whom doctors had described at the age of fourteen, as having a mental age of six. Despicable crimes by despicable people. 
Thoroughly grim viewing. 

[johnphilip]

1 hour ago, Scully said:

Without meaning to diminish by any means, the posts which have previously been posted ( I have lost a child also ) it was a programme about all the ‘lives lost’ ( innocents ) during ‘ the troubles’. I just seemed to pick up the programme at the point it was focussing in children caught up in bombings and killings, in particular two young sisters killed during a bombing by the UDF, and two young men abducted and murdered for whatever reason. One of them was in his late teens, whom doctors had described at the age of fourteen, as having a mental age of six. Despicable crimes by despicable people. 
Thoroughly grim viewing. 

There is a very sad , Irish folk song that sums  it all up,  the senseless  waste of lives on both sides . Set during the times  of " the troubles "  it  is called  " there were Rose's " . When I used to sing at the folk clubs  , I would often sing it . People would say , it does  , sum all the stupidity  of people not getting on , and this " eye for an eye  " . 

[oldypigeonpopper]

hello, i always thought in my life time there could be Peace in Northern Ireland,

[39TDS]

I am sorry for all your losses.

Thankfully I haven't lost a child but my missus lost her brother in a car accident. I have seen the hurt and devastation it brings to the family.

[islandgun]

6 hours ago, Scully said:

Without meaning to diminish by any means, the posts which have previously been posted ( I have lost a child also ) it was a programme about all the ‘lives lost’ ( innocents ) during ‘ the troubles’. I just seemed to pick up the programme at the point it was focussing in children caught up in bombings and killings, in particular two young sisters killed during a bombing by the UDF, and two young men abducted and murdered for whatever reason. One of them was in his late teens, whom doctors had described at the age of fourteen, as having a mental age of six. Despicable crimes by despicable people. 
Thoroughly grim viewing. 

As you say despicable, its hard for me to imagine what sort of person would  knowingly kill children for an ideal or money, I despair of humanity sometimes

[bavarianbrit]

My family are from Newry, last time I went there I was 7 in 1957, then when I was 18 the troubles started and I could never visit with my coventry accent and have never been able to go there since as I still do not believe that overnight the good friday agreement could / is possible. Terrible times they were and all sides claimed to be civilised. Misguided illegitimates.