Mr_G Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Hi all, I'm hoping to get some advice to help with a situation I have at home. I applied for my SGC about 8 weeks ago and currently I'm still waiting for Police to finish their checks etc. While all that is going on I spoke to my girlfriend/partner about getting a cabinet installed in the loft and it has been met with a fair bit of resistance. She basically doesn't want a gun in the house. She has no issue with me shooting, but as far as keeping a shotgun in the house she is having non of it. I have asked her why is she so against it and I get answers such as 'because she doesn't want the kids thinking guns are normal', or it's not safe. I grew up around guns, and I'm a perfectly well adjusted human being with a decent moral compass. Now as far as I'm concerned the shotgun will be locked away in the loft out of reach of any kids, or anyone else for that matter. I've tried to compromise with her explaining I genuinely will not keep ammunition in the house, but that was no use. Once the police come round to the house to speak to the pair of us, as soon as she says anything to them about her feelings then I've lost my chance. She seems to think we live in America and it's like the wild west out on the streets. It's so frustrating trying to reason with her as she is being so stubborn about it she won't stop to consider the facts and whether what she is saying makes any sense. I honestly can't get to the root of the issue without a big kick off. It's worth noting she is heavily pregnant and it could be her maternal instinct kicking in. It's a shame because I really enjoy the sport but I feel its going to be a short term enjoyment.. Has anybody been in a similar situation or can anybody offer any reasonable advice please? Thanks G (I have spoken to my Dad (who can't understand her issue either) who said he will get a SGC so I can keep the gun at his house. But that's another 12-15 weeks waiting on top of my already 8 weeks. However it's the only way fwd I can see at this time) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matth12321 Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Tried getting her to try clay shooting? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Browning 425 clay hunter Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 New girlfriend ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snow white Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Yep new girl friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fuzzypigeon Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 As above Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fisheruk Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 New girlfriend ? +1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bullet1747 Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 +1 +2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_G Posted January 10, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Tried getting her to try clay shooting? I've tried to take her to meet people and show her what's going on and all that but she just isn't interested. I wish she would as she'd have a better understanding. To the rest of you, new GF isn't the answer guys. More of a partner of 8 years and 2 children than just a girlfriend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dougy Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 (edited) She likes you but does not like you shooting. Trust age and wisdom. You will do one of 3 thing's. 1 stop shooting 2 carry on shooting and she will dump you 3 Get one that wants to be with you the way you are, and not want to change you. Incedently once she's changed you to what she wants you will be different from when you first met and she will dump you. Time will tell and you will remember advice given. Lol edit for spelling Edited January 10, 2016 by Dougy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dannyboy220 Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Your dad hasn't got to have a certificate. My feo says that as long as you only have the keys the cabinet can be anywhere as long as you're the only one with access. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BRYAN3 Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 I've tried to take her to meet people and show her what's going on and all that but she just isn't interested. I wish she would as she'd have a better understanding. To the rest of you, new GF isn't the answer guys. More of a partner of 8 years and 2 children than just a girlfriend. So she has already experienced your "shooting" then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
motty Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 I think you need to take the trousers off your girlfriend, and put them on yourself. I couldn't be with a woman who would try to stop me shooting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twistedsanity Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Yep, unless she bonks like a professional and cooks like a Ramsey kick her to the kerb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_G Posted January 10, 2016 Author Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Your dad hasn't got to have a certificate. My feo says that as long as you only have the keys the cabinet can be anywhere as long as you're the only one with access. Interesting! Cheers. Can anyone confirm this? I'll call on Monday either way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
la bala Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 This looks a bit one sided Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JDog Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Tinder is pretty good I hear. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bullet1747 Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Have to see how it pans out mate , good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FalconFN Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Your dad hasn't got to have a certificate. My feo says that as long as you only have the keys the cabinet can be anywhere as long as you're the only one with access.This is the only helpful post so far. I know from experience that having a logical conversation with a pregnant partner is very, very difficult especially if they already have their mind made up. My advice would be to look at storing it at your dad's house, but if that isn't possible then perhaps hold off for a year and try again when things settle down. Good luck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kent Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Ok what she really needs to do is meet families like mine Get her out among the shooting people and families I have a 16 yr old and a 10 yr old both girls Two very balanced girls Both exposed to guns from birth. One used to shout at the TV as a little one when she saw an actor handle a gun badly it was quite funny Honestly if she won't get involved and wants to mold you to her wishes she will just dump you saying " your not the man I met " in a few more years otherwise If the plan fails dump her! BTW if the feo gets wind of this you will likely get turned down. If she fears your likely to do bad things she is either correct or totally lacking trust in you Don't bode well does it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozzy518 Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Install the cabinet in the loft. Get ur gun n put it in there. There is no reason for her to ever see it, or the kids. It's a sort of compromise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Browning 425 clay hunter Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Tinder is pretty good I hear. +1 I'm doing quite well on there Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robbiep Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Install the cabinet in the loft. Get ur gun n put it in there. There is no reason for her to ever see it, or the kids. It's a sort of compromise. The FEO will still almost certainly want to speak to her when the visit happens (they do these days, and entirely correctly in my opinion), and will ask her how she feels about guns in the house. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
novice cushie shooter Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 You have a tough one here mate. I wouldnt be keeping it at your dads. If you want to go early doors shooting and paranoid about waking him up. I would sit down with you mrs (on a good day) and explain the pros and cons and how to find a compramise. Try the angle that guns in the right hands are safe and not dangerous and vital tools. My 7 yo daughter loves learning about it so using the kids as a negative isnt right. If all else fails bin her! ;-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beagle boy Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 Leave her keep then guns at home. Depending on your up bringing guns are normal as they are for thousands of family's. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eieieio Posted January 10, 2016 Report Share Posted January 10, 2016 My mrs didn't want a gun in the house either - I now have one. The mrs didn't want a dog - I now have one. The mrs definitely didn't want a second dog - i'm picking it up next month. To keep her sweet I paid for a weekend away and an overpriced handbag from House of Fraser. Three options (although it looks like you may have to settle for number 1) 1) Dads house. Depends how much ear ache you are going to get from the mrs and how laid back your dad is with any early morning visits to collect the gun. 2) Install the cabinet in the loft and out of her and the kids sight. When the feo came to my house my mrs was out. The feo just asked if anyone else lived in the house, I said yes, he said ok. That was it. 3) Install a cabinet where you like and just let the mrs deal with it but book for the feo to come round when she is out for the day. This depends on your relationship with her though and how she is likely to react. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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