Lord Geordie Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 Sorry guys! I needed someone to talk to, Unfortunatley that means you lot! Jacki and Myself have decided after 10 years that we are no longer getting on, She is moving on and I am apparently no longer the guy she once new It hurts like hell and I finished work today and just walked for walkings sake, I just dont enjoy going home at the moment and need to get my head straight! I am not going to do anything stupid, I just hurt a lot emotionally and it will take some time for me to get back to being me! I have work to keep me busy tomorrow until mid day then I am going to just have a good mooch about the town and perhaps over gateshead centre for the afternoon to keep my mind off it! think tuesday I will crack on with my sticks and find some DIY or something to sort out! Best weight loss plan this malarky, I just cant face food today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luckyshot Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 **** news but that's life, if you can get to me SR7-8SB and fancy a day or nights shooting pm me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyefor Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 Hi. I don't know how old you are or if there are kids involved but you cannot force someone to do anything they don't want to so look upon it as an opportunity. At least Jacki likes (liked?) you enough to be straight and honest and did not **** on you behind your back. There are a lot of people far worse off than you so take a look at the upsides, plan the best for yourself and move on. I've been ridiculously lucky to have been married to a great woman since TV's were in black & white - but I'm a great believer in divorce if it ain't working. The sun will shine again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
panoma1 Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 Women.......they are attracted to you for what you are.........then they set about changing you....when they have changed you they no longer want you because you are no longer the man you were when they met you! Lesson learnt.....its your life, be happy and live it for yourself not for someone else........you share your life with a partner you don't give your life away to please them! If they can't accept that......bin em! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
grrclark Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 That is rotten to hear that LG and words from strangers will do little to change how you feel right now, only you can do that yourself with some honest thoughts and time to get over the body blow. Keeping yourself busy is a good plan as dwelling on thoughts for too long is never healthy, especially thoughts that you can never find an answer to, especially the "what if?" or "if only" type thoughts. You do need to give yourself time to think about what is important to you and your happiness in the future, sadly that won't include Jacki so no sense on lingering on those type of thoughts, there is no value to be had in looking backwards as you can't change that, you can only influence the future so make that is sure where you try to spend your time thinking. Think about the choices that you can make for yourself to arrive at a point where you feel content and happy and use those thoughts to work out a plan for you to help you plot your way through this point of emotional turmoil. I know all of that is easy said and much harder to do. Best wishes and hope you find the right way for you to get through this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drut Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 " It hurts like hell and I finished work today and just walked for walkings sake, I just dont enjoy going home at the moment and need to get my head straight!" My thoughts are with you.Some years ago but have been there,remember walking along the cycle path by the side of the Tyne at 01.30 thinking ***! Just my take but the female of the species seems to have stronger emotional armour.One day at a time was the only answer I ever found. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mungler Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 'homosexuals, I can't condone it but I can understand it'. The wise words of Terry the plumber Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JDog Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 I have always enjoyed your involvement with PW and am sorry to hear of your predicament. I wish you luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
.223 Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 (edited) Sorry to hear this mate, I have been there myself my ex left me after 10 years about 18 months ago. Lost my head completely didn't know how I would cope or what reason I had to carry on. Spent weeks just walking every night all night just to keep out the house couldn't eat or sleep. Found the best thing for me was to keep busy started helping on my friends shoot every evening after work. Took time out of work mid -week to go beating which helped break up the days. Being around good friends was the best thing for me. ( makes you realise how good they are) Slowly I came round now 6 months into a new realationship with a woman who has a lot more in common with me than the ex ever did. Honestly I am far happier now, than I ever have been in the last 10 years but 18 months ago I thought my world had ended. Keep busy, find a friend to listen and be honest and tell him everything it helps, Keep positive and who knows where you will be in 18 months. Edited October 25, 2015 by .223 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ditchman Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 sorry to hear that............but things will sort themselves out as you both are not at each others throats !.............time is a great healer and there might be some really good surprises around the corner best of luck boy........ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fortune Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 (edited) Only you know what the score is and if you want to party or not but it takes two to tango and you have got to look at the reasons and then decide if it can be mended or if you want to mend a broken link. I dont think that walking aimlessly around because you dont like being at home is going to solve or resolve the problem. I'm not being judgemental. Best wishes for you and the sun will come out again after the showers. Edited October 25, 2015 by fortune Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dougy Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 Lord George, Keep your chin up, get yourself out and get your dipstick damp. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spinach Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 Good luck. Give your self time. John. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
100milesaway Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 Sorry to hear this mate, I have been there myself my ex left me after 10 years about 18 months ago. Lost my head completely didn't know how I would cope or what reason I had to carry on. Spent weeks just walking every night all night just to keep out the house couldn't eat or sleep. Found the best thing for me was to keep busy started helping on my friends shoot every evening after work. Took time out of work mid -week to go beating which helped break up the days. Being around good friends was the best thing for me. ( makes you realise how good they are) Slowly I came round now 6 months into a new realationship with a woman who has a lot more in common with me than the ex ever did. Honestly I am far happier now, than I ever have been in the last 10 years but 18 months ago I thought my world had ended. Keep busy, find a friend to listen and be honest and tell him everything it helps, Keep positive and who knows where you will be in 18 months. This is a very good post, it is always good to hear of someone else who has gone through the same horrors and is now coming out the other side, wiser, happier and healthier. You will feel more in control when all the emotions settle down, it just takes time.Good luck. from Auntie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul taylor Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 Lord Geordie. From your previous posts I see you have not had it easy what with losses of employment and struggling for funds. It's such a shame to hear your getting yet another kick in the nuts from life but you seem to have your head and heart in the right place and I sincerely hope your luck takes a turn for the better soon. As others have said I also have felt like I had ****** all to go on for and nothing to look forward to but life has a habit of surprising you for the better usually when you least expect it so keep on plodding along mate and have faith all will improve with time. All the best. P. T Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 I went through this 4 1/2 years ago . I was with my ex 7 years and had 2 children aged 2&5 and she left for another guy. She took my kids away for 8/9 weeks until I won at court costing my parents £3k as I was skint and on antidepressants to get me out of bed. Funny thing was the bloke dumped her after a week lol. After a month I joined plenty of fish ( smelly finger to my mates lol ) and had some fun until I met the Mrs in a club one night by accident . She's beautiful, awesome body, great with my kids and we've just had a baby and I thought my life had ended after the ex when infact its the best thing she ever did for me I'm only 33 I know but I'll never be scared of being single again. Keeping busy is the answer honestly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
digger Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 I echo all the above sentiments and add DON'T bottle it up. Share with a mate over a beer. It is what is is sadly, no amount of ifs buts or maybes will change it. It's hard but trust me day by day it gets easier. Thoughts are with you sir Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rodp Posted October 25, 2015 Report Share Posted October 25, 2015 Just a thought, and don't want to add to any stress. Don't fall out with her, and if you think it's heading that way lodge your guns with your RFD. Women can have a wicked sense of revenge. Sorry to hear of your troubles though buddy and wish you all the best. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mossy835 Posted October 26, 2015 Report Share Posted October 26, 2015 sorry to here this, a lot have been there even me 3 times,met a girl 18 years ago she been there 2 times we went out for a while got married, 15 years ago.and all is great you will get back on your feet again there is other life out there,all the best.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
loriusgarrulus Posted October 26, 2015 Report Share Posted October 26, 2015 This happened to me at 39. Traded in for a younger model who had been one of my friends. Felt like I was walking round with reject stamped on my forehead. Only being there for my children kept me level. Met OH after my divorce he had been divorced a couple of years. He was my first boyfriend at school, we fell out over something silly like you do as teenagers. We have been together 20 years now this time and married 18 years. There is light at the end of the tunnel. As others have said try to keep it calm, if you fall out with your ex only the solicitors benefit and it makes it worse for you and any children. Keep your chin up it does get better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katzenjammer Posted October 26, 2015 Report Share Posted October 26, 2015 Sorry to hear this and take comfort from the fact that you are not the first nor the last for this to happen to. (19 years ago now for me). People change, yes even you have changed though you may not think so, relationships grow stale for one partner or another or for both. Recognise this, accept this and meet it head on with your own goals of what you want out of this situation ( I wanted my house and my child and I got both). Sorry to sound harsh but moping around won't help. That's why you need goals because it is unlikely that the situation will change? Stay calm, stay amicable as has already been counselled. And when it is all done and settled you will find that you will move into calmer waters. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eyefor Posted October 26, 2015 Report Share Posted October 26, 2015 (edited) A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. All of a sudden, he said out loud, "Lord, grant me one wish." The sunny California sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice, the Lord said, "Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish." The man said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over anytime I want." The Lord said, "Your request is very materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take over thousands of miles! I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of another wish, a wish you think would honour and glorify me." The man thought about it for a very long time. Finally he said, "Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they are thinking when they give the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say " nothing!", and how I can make a woman truly happy." The Lord also thought for a long time and then replied, "You want two lanes or four lanes on that bridge! Edited October 26, 2015 by Eyefor Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
davewh100 Posted October 26, 2015 Report Share Posted October 26, 2015 sutch a lot of lovely comments chin up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ferguson_tom Posted October 26, 2015 Report Share Posted October 26, 2015 My parents reached the same conclusion when i was about 18 which was 8 years ago now they had been married 20 off years. Without shadow of a doubt it was the best thing to happen to both my parents as they come out of the relationship they werent happy and both found new ones they are. Granted its pretty **** for a while but that soon passes. As people grow older life makes you change, the person you were 10 years ago wont be the person you are now....but just as she was perfect for you ten years ago you will find someone new who is perfect for the person you are now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackpowder Posted October 26, 2015 Report Share Posted October 26, 2015 As other posters we know you have not had it easy of late and now this blow. You have got to look ahead, plan new thingsto do. Walking is actually quite a good idea, and it is inexpensive in to the bargain. Blackpowder Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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