AVB Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 This post needs pictures. Simple. I got in before Mungler requests the same. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ferguson_tom Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 Smoking a bit of weed for the first time with her mates hardly means she will start on a 40 a day habit. I might be wrong but sounds like a group of mums got together and tried something they never had or havent had since they were teenagers for a bit of fun, no harm done or intended. However if it has put you on the sofa then like others have said it sounds like you are trying to find an excuse to end it. Be better all round to man up and admit your relationship has run its course as it currently stands, you cant keep holding on to the people you were. Your options are either call it a day or the harder choice is to try and work on the relationship and see if you can embrace the new people you have become. Your not alone by the way plenty of people have gone through these feelings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mungler Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 (edited) Maybe youve completely misunderstood her and have been projecting your idealised expectations on her and she has had enough, this being her way of kicking back. It sounds like you're resentful of her friends and fearful that they have more influence than you do. The biggest risk I can see is that the more you freak out on the basis of the person you wanted her to be the faster she will disappear over the horizon. This. What would your view be is she came home 6 pints to the wind after a night out with the girls? [bearing in mind that a spliff is just another route to 6 pints or thereabouts]. If your reaction is the same then I'm afraid the Stepford dream is over for you. Indeed, I doubt it's the "smoking or the drug thing" but more her doing something which she would have known you would have disapproved of, but went ahead and did it anyway. I really just can't see how her having a toke with her friends automatically means game over for your marriage unless there is much much more to this. Indeed, if that's all you have to worry about in your relationship.... You should try and relax. Get some old Bob Marley vinyl out, get down the garage for a stock of Pringles and Mars bars and get your Mrs to roll you one - if she rolls a perfect Camberwell carrot then you'll know it's not her second one :lol: . Edited August 22, 2017 by Mungler Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cranfield Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 What did she say when you discussed it with her ? If you haven't, then that should be the first thing you do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nobbyathome Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 matty married life is not always perfect and to be honest with you leaving her for having a spliff is the most stupid excuse to get out of a marriage I have heard for ages first of all you need to take a good look at yourself and your children are you perfect to live with I doubt it . if your marriage has gone west before this and it sounds like it has either sort it properly with her or get proper guidance from the professionals we at pw will always give you advice but at the end of the day you and only you have to man up and sort it out marriages can work if you try Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dougall Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 This. What would your view be is she came home 6 pints to the wind after a night out with the girls? [bearing in mind that a spliff is just another route to 6 pints or thereabouts]. If your reaction is the same then I'm afraid the Stepford dream is over for you. Indeed, I doubt it's the "smoking or the drug thing" but more her doing something which she would have known you would have disapproved of, but went ahead and did it anyway. I really just can't see how her having a toke with her friends automatically means game over for your marriage unless there is much much more to this. Indeed, if that's all you have to worry about in your relationship.... You should try and relax. Get some old Bob Marley vinyl out, get down the garage for a stock of Pringles and Mars bars and get your Mrs to roll you one - if she rolls a perfect Camberwell carrot then you'll know it's not her second one :lol: . on the money..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
walshie Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 The very fact you are thinking of leaving her over something so petty speaks volumes for how things were anyway. She's free to do as she pleases and doesn't need your permission or blessing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Me matt Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 I had a bird once that was a stoner.... most amazing intercourse ever, the things that girl wanted to do after joint hahaha Dowm side was- afterwards she'd eat every last bit of chocolate and bag of crisps in a 50 metre radius lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R1nut Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 I had a bird once that was a stoner.... most amazing intercourse ever, the things that girl wanted to do after joint hahaha Dowm side was- afterwards she'd eat every last bit of chocolate and bag of crisps in a 50 metre radius lol I laughed so hard snot came out my nose!!!! How to lighten the question Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vince Green Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 (edited) the faster she will disappear over the horizon. And re-appear with a lawyer in tow! Do you imagine men put on batman outfits and climb up cranes because they think it will be a laugh? For a man, leaving your wife if there are kids involved is financial suicide. She can screw you in every single way and then even more so in ways you couldn't even imagine existed. My mate Pete split up with his wife when his daughter Sally was 4 years old. He never ever saw her again. When he died last year Sally became a multi millionaire. He left everything to her, she never even came to his funeral. Edited August 22, 2017 by Vince Green Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Geordie Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 Pull her to one side and have a good word! Clowning with drugs, she is certainly no role model for your kids to follow! But then neither is quitting at the first sign of trouble. Sit down and talk about it! Find out WHY she started the drugs! Might be she is in need of a listening ear. Or close to a breakdown etc. Could be a number of reasons. But get talking first before you just quit! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rimfire4969 Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 When I go and watch the rugby I normally come home quite drunk, my misses does not like it but puts up with it and me. If she went out with a few mates and had a few too many I except it, if she had a joint it's up to her she is old enough to make the choice herself. Would I be pleased no, but would I consider leaving her HELL NO. This must be a final straw kind of thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smokersmith Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 Communication is the way forwards. Listen to her on what's changed, and made her do it .... tell her how it makes you feel (perhaps leave out divorce 1st time round!). Hopefully there will be some common ground, and you can have a couple of bottles of wine and have an early night. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davyo Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 (edited) You need a man shed mate.Mine gets off her tits on red wine.Its an opportunity to get things in like "I'm thinking about buying a new car/gun/fishing rod" Been married 30 years,as others say it's not a walk in the park.I think if you need to get a 3rd party involved then you obviously can't talk about stuff together.Sometimes you just need space,I fish and play in the man shed.She's in a running club so we're not both just plunked in front of TV all night 'just going through the mill' Edited August 22, 2017 by Davyo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
saddler Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 Forgot dope was now 100% legal... Remember the olden days when having a dope smoker under your roof was a valid reason to have your firearm and/or shotgun certificates pulled? Or when YOU could face charges for letting folk smoke da urb in your house? Dark distant days.....they even stopped stoners from driving on the public highways! Backwards thinking or wot? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gordon R Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 Pull her to one side and have a good word! Clowning with drugs, she is certainly no role model for your kids to follow! But then neither is quitting at the first sign of trouble. Sit down and talk about it! Find out WHY she started the drugs! Might be she is in need of a listening ear. Or close to a breakdown etc. Could be a number of reasons. But get talking first before you just quit! There is clearly more to this than posted, but I would take it badly if my wife suddenly started with drugs. She would be divorced rapidly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davyo Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 (edited) You get two different types of women.Those that are carp in bed but make a good sandwich & can't do enough for ya.Then there is those that are great in bed & let you do anything "go on son knock ya self out"But what runs parallel with this is shes bloody mental.Mine has her own mood swing in the front garden. Edited August 22, 2017 by Davyo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
team tractor Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 I'm only 6 years in again and with a little girl. I don't think she could ever do anything to make me hate her. She's amazing. The ex of 6 years and 2 kids stopped smoking for me/ our kids but a few years later she started again and wanted to party all the time. I still hate her now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ips Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 I was married to the first Mrs nutcase for seven years but we were on borrowed time for the last six years. I have been with current one for twenty years and wouldn't swap her for anyone in the world. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sian Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 I'm trying to get a sense of how old you are and the length of your relationship. Perhaps she is of an age where she doesn't want to have to live up to your expectations, perhaps you are a little more demanding of how you think she should be and behave and she doesn't want to be that way anymore. I have never taken weed myself but let's just put it into context. She may be rebelling, her friends may be trying to influence her to try things, do as she wants rather than always how she is expected to be. Did you put yourself on the sofa or did she? If you are honestly saying a spliff could signify the end of your time together and your family life then that is crazy - sorry. I suspect though there is a breakdown that has seeped into your lives gradually over the years. Good luck to you both whatever you decide. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mice! Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 (edited) How old are your kids fella? I'm guessing there only young but could be wrong obviously, might be she was just having a drink with her mates and one of them was passing the joint, I've never smoked not my thing been in the situation plenty were everyone else is getting stoned and looking at me funny for not joining in, maybe she was just wondering wot all the fuss was about? I wouldn't expect my misses to be smoking anything and it would definitely **** me off but wouldn't be grounds for divorce, every week then that's different. Another thought, probably much better having a vent on here, you don't have to live with us. Edited August 22, 2017 by Mice! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smokersmith Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 You get two different types of women.Those that are carp in bed but make a good sandwich & can't do enough for ya.Then there is those that are great in bed & let you do anything "go on son knock ya self out"But what runs parallel with this is shes bloody mental.Mine has her own mood swing in the front garden. Search for "Crazy hot matrix" on YouTube for more on this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gordon R Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 If the wife wants to take drugs (which she is aware that it will upset her husband), it would appear that she cares more about impressing / fitting in with her friends, than she cares about upsetting her husband. Half a tale at best, but the OP needs to find out what is behind this and if there is any marriage to salvage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mungler Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 I had a bird once that was a stoner.... most amazing intercourse ever, the things that girl wanted to do after joint hahaha Dowm side was- afterwards she'd eat every last bit of chocolate and bag of crisps in a 50 metre radius lol I laughed out loud at that. Good darts sir. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JDog Posted August 22, 2017 Report Share Posted August 22, 2017 I had a bird once that was a stoner.... most amazing intercourse ever, the things that girl wanted to do after joint hahaha Dowm side was- afterwards she'd eat every last bit of chocolate and bag of crisps in a 50 metre radius lol I had a bird once that was a stoner.... most amazing intercourse ever, the things that girl wanted to do after joint hahaha Dowm side was- afterwards she'd eat every last bit of chocolate and bag of crisps in a 50 metre radius lol Which year was it when you married her and how much does she weigh now? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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